Joined 31.05.16

System

Hello lovely.
Sorry I have been quiet for a few days. Sounds like you are still working HARD - that means you can do whatever you like at the weekend as you have earned it! and enjoy your lovely well stocked fridge, sounds delish.

Had a week of seeing friends and therefore drank lots - much much more than usual. Looking forward to soberdom, as it definitely makes me feel rubbish and put on weight. Well done you for your week of abstinence - do you think it is becoming easier for you to say no? or that people at work have got more used to you saying no, so don't nag you as much to go out? Either way, it's all going to help you make a massive difference to your debt.

How are you doing against your signature targets - did you hit £14,000 on the 25th? Are you on track for your November target?

Anyway, lovely to be back. Catch up with you soon. Ramble x

Poor_Single_lady

Hi Ramble. Glad you enjoyed your time away. We all need a little bit of indulgence sometimes. We are people and not robots. I work with some people who seem to be robots and personally I think they are heading for major midlife crisis when they realise they have the power to.make their own choices and think for themselves. Its like thier brains are asleep.

Anyway im going off track. I didn't make my target but it was majorly ambitious! Im just all or.nothing so I find it easier setting near impossible targets. All the debt is coming down, its just slow but I do see a big improvement in november and i am on top of christmas so that shouldn't derail me.

I think my colleagues just think I am being strange. It is getting easier tho. Personally i could not manage 3 nights a week of drinking after work. One is enough but none is better! I think they think I am a bit antisocial but its how it needs to be right now.

Current totals
Credit card £4480
Credit card £3550
Credit card £3080
Credit card £1750 going first/second
Loan £1991 going first/second

Money in bank £140 (mostly allocated)
Money in purse £100 (not sure how this happened)
Plus money in draw £120 for big expenses

Still to pay for quite a lot this month. 23 days left after today. Going to make a few meals today and put in the freezer. That should help food wise. Very pleased with yesterdays shop although it was a bit of a dent in the finances and i didn't get everything.
The debt thing is one day at a time but we will all get there. xxx

Uhtred_Ragnarsson

I feel your pain on this one - as you know I suffer a little bit of this from friends but interestingly enough, not from colleagues. For me, constantly saying no (most times) has been enough to set the tone so now, although I will always be invited, it's just the general invitation that everyone gets. I no longer get the pushing and pleading which is so good .

You are doing really well; small things like topping up your Oyster card without putting it on a credit card, that's real progress.

Keep your chin up!

hannahroberts1985

Hey, quick pop in now I'm back after being AWOL. Sounds like a tough week. You are doing great at saying no to the social aspects though! I am have a friend who has just started a dryathone a month no drink. If you really want to knuckle down for a month and are sick of making excuses to people maybe start one so they all back off. Xx

reality_check

I have friends who all work in the city centre and they have constant never ending after work drinks so I can imagine it's hard to say no! Luckily for me I work outside the city and most people drive to work so work nights out are always planned and never spontaneous. Thankfully as I can just about make the annual Christmas night out but that is mainly because 98% of them are not my cup of tea and being around them in work whilst I am being paid is bad enough never mind in my free time! But I am sure working in a place where people actually like each other is nicer than my situation lol

Why don't you just tell colleagues at work that you are challenging yourself with a certain amount of weeks/month going sober for a detox? I personally get easily irritated with people around me drunk and I am sober but could you pop by the pub after work and have a few soft drinks? Then you won't feel like you're missing out as much?! Even if you are having a few drinks at home/weekend with friends a little white lie won't hurt with what you tell everyone at work....

When you start to shop in Lidl anywhere else after that seems expensive! You might have went over what you would have spent in Lidl but sometimes a change is good and like you said you will eat it so not the end of the world.

Hope you have a good weekend xxx

lulu650

Hi PSL, I think you've done well to acknowledge the debt you're in and it looks like you've reined your spending in so that you are not adding to the debt, but you don't seem to be in a postion yet to make serious inroads into paying it off and it looks like a very long journey for you.

It might be worth stepping back and thinking where you will in the year and then the next five years. How long will it take to pay all of your debt off for instance?

Are you ready for hardcore saving yet? Food reductions at the end of the day to freeze? Clothes shopping in charity shops? Can you earn money elsewhere?

Best of luck to you

Poor_Single_lady

Thank you everyone for dropping in. I am finding it so hard right now. Just need to take each day one challenge at a time.
Going to do some cooking now and focus.

Reality you are so right. Everywhere is expensive after lidl. And lidl is brilliant but i think you need the odd Sainsbury's shop as well.

I have no idea of my debt free date, im planning a new job next year which may mean slightly lower imcome which may slow things down. If things stay the same I imagine around 4 years but could be less or more. 4 years is ok.

The colleagues love getting together, I love my team which is a good position to be in but a lot of the rest of the office i would not choose to spend time with to put it mildly! So its hard when its just a team thing and its people that I am genuinely glad to have in my life. Im hoping it will get easier. Been working so hard recently with hardly any time for fun.
One pub visit this week with my very much neglected bff. Looking forward to it.

In tonight. Gold star for effort. Wake up tomorrow clean kitchen and food cooked.
A day of study and no spending.
Then onto monday.

louby40

PSL, you are doing so well. It must be hard to have those social pressures. I'm old now (47) and work in a small village primary school so nights out are Christmas, end of term in the summer and a few of us go out for each others birthdays every couple of months.

Just keep plodding on - cut down where you can and remember to live too!

Poor_Single_lady

louby 47 is not old. Plus in all your posts you sound young and not remotely old! Surely teachers are the very ones that need the socialising more than anyone. Spending all day with children would leave me wanting a drink at 3.30 for sure.

On monday payment to last credit card to make the position as follows -
2x credit card £3550 +£4450 =£8,000
£3080
£1750
£1991

Cant believe it is over 3 weeks to pay day. Feels like a long time.

Still to pay
£8 love film
£20 phone
£30 travel
3 weeks of eating
Minimum 1work lunch
1 work night out (maybe just one or soft drink)
1 x pub visit bff
1 x family pub visit
1 x dentist - money in draw
Possible pub visit w/ friend in london

One day at a time but I know its going to be tight this month.
Need to stay out of the overdraft and watch credit card spending and push all non essential spending into october.
Good luck to everyone. xxx

[Deleted User]

You can defo accomplish that list PSL.

Will take hard work & determination which you have!

We will do this one day at a time, one £ at a time until we are free.

Dxxx