Losing my rag with our vendor

franklee

bambi1980 wrote: »

Why can't this vendor agree to a date and stick to it. We have been repeatedly assured by her estate agent that she can vacate when we're ready and that she won't let her onward purchase delay the sale.

She probably hasn't got anyone to stay with like you have and doesn't want to be homeless. If she rents an AST is usually a minimum six months - which will be expensive.

An estate agent will say anything to keep a sale so their assurances are pretty much worthless. You should pay heed to what the vendor's solicitor tells your solicitor and perhaps if you have a good rapport to what the vendor says. However until exchange of contracts it's all up for grabs anyway. Best you can do is strike up a conversation with the vendor and also understand exactly what your solicitor is waiting for and chivy vendor/vendor's EA to sort that element.

Meanwhile your waiting position while annoying isn't really that bad and the extra costs not that much in the scheme of house buying. So perhaps chill a bit and be thankful you're not in a long chain - you have checked your vendor's purchase is the end of the chain ... if not make sure you know how any upward chain stands!

warby68

Best advice really is to calm down, dig deep and find some tolerance and stop viewing the vendor as the enemy.

She may have said things in what she considers to be good faith and hit legal questions and snags she wasn't expecting. She may not have realised what it would cost or mean to take temporary accommodation. The delays could easily be with solicitors and she is getting the blame.

Your orginal timescales were probably unrealistic and it was unwise to commit yourselves to a date until ALL parties solicitors in the chain had agreed. You did it while early stage paperwork was still flying (or rather drifting at a typical snail's pace) backwards and forwards - that really was unwise whatever your vendor said. If the solicitors are not ready to go it really doesn't matter what everyone else says. Its harder to get solicitors to speed up in my experience than vendors etc. You wanted it all quicker than the 'norm' but very hard to get a full chain to actually hear that.

The hostility you are currently showing does not bode well for keeping EVERYONE (and there a lot of parties to house chain) on side until completion. I know you feel 'messed about' but to others this is simply the reality of a somewhat complex process where a lot of the parties have their own interests/agendas and may simply not be experienced enough to anticipate the snags.

I know you want to 'punish' her or someone, anyone, to get your frustration out but unfortunately its rarely the best way. Getting a house move done often involves a bit of 'sucking it up'

We've done 5 moves - seen plenty

AnotherJoe

In contrast to pretty much everyone else here I do think the vendor is messing the OP around and wouldn't be surprised if there were further delays or even it fell through. She has gone back on what she originally stated twice from what the OP has said.

Whilst upon reflection asking for a bit off might annoy the vendor and cause them to withdraw, I would start looking around as a precaution and I'd let the EA know that you are worried about the seriousness of the vendor and that's why you are looking at other properties.

By doing this you make it clear you are genuinely concerned. If the vendor really is now close to concluding this might help her define some dates, if she isn't, well at least you'll know.

laneycakes

Hey Bambi. I completely get your position. We are having similar problems. We were told by the EA when we offered back in January that the vendors had to complete their onward purchase by 31st March, and thus our purchase of their place had to be done by then. We are their second buyers (first lot pulled out three weeks in so they ShOULD have been several weeks ahead of us on their purchase) I moved heaven and earth to get everything done, making a pain of myself with surveyors, solicitors etc and agreeing to things I may not have done had this deadline not been imposed on us. As late as mid March we were told by their solicitor via EA that exchange and completion was still on for end of the month....guess what. It's the third of May and we are still in our rental and their purchase is holding everything up. Basically nothing had been done on their purchase for the first two months, their solicitor is useless, and now there are "very difficult" queries on their new house to resolve...all of which means we have no option but to wait, and wait and wait. Like you we are heavily invested but it does feel unfair when you've kept to your side of the bargain but the other side don't (in your case saying the vendor was good to go ASAP, and in our case the vendors onward purchase imposed exchange/completion date).

The only thing that's speeded ours up in any way was the fact we saw an alternative property on with the same agent in April, and due to the delays we requested a viewing...that day lots happened, so in the end we decided not to view it as things seemed to be moving...kinda regretting that now and are actively searching Rightmove again just in case. Mortgage offer (we've paid £1499 non refundable fee) only lasts 6 months so if their queries aren't resolve able we need to think of plan b. I don't think it's our actual vendors fault-it's their solicitors for being so rubbish, and poss the EA on their onward purchase not progressing the sale.

So-you are not alone, if that makes you feel any better. All I would say is that we've now decided to be a bit firmer and on our solicitors advice will only agree to dates that suit us as we've been messed around so much. Good luck!

Doozergirl

bambi1980 wrote: »

I totally agree that it's not the vendor's fault that we moved out etc but we were told a couple of weeks ago that she wouldn't let her onward purchase affect our sale and that's exactly what she's doing. Anyone would be annoyed at that! The date was agreed and now she's reneged on it. I had to book time off work otherwise I ran the risk of not being available if it had gone through on that date.

I don't want to start messing about with money as its not my style we just want to show them that they're messing us about now. It's unfair that we've not got a leg to stand on!

Given that you are probably telling her what hell it is to live with family and have your belongings in storage, do you think she'd be excited to do the same to herself?

I do feel for you, but the only rule that can possibly apply to buying and selling a house is to 'go with it'. We don't have control in these situations. The more we try to exert control or demands, the more stressful it gets.

It was your decision to move out, presumably because you felt you'd be financially better off somewhere down the line, and you're eight weeks in to a new process, which isn't unusual.

You can only agree a completion date via solicitors and shouldn't make arrangements that cost money without that. I presume your first purchase was easy, as this is usually a FTB error of judgement.

It is genuinely your choice to decide how to deal with this emotionally. You can 'lose your rag' at people and make yourself miserable, or you can look realistically at the chain and the amount of time it may take from here and look forward to your new home and accept that this is temporary.

You can stamp your feet, shout at estate agent's etc. but it won't do any better than being reasonable with them, and your own emotions. To me, it would be better to accept that you weren't being all that sensible when you made yourselves homeless and that this woman is probably quite genuine about selling her house and that it will happen.

Hopefully whatever you are doing for two weeks at the end of May is something worth holding back on moving day for.

Deep breathing.