Stop step grandchildren inheriting

System

The only safe way that I can think of is to bequeath the money directly to the grandchildren missing out yourself and your brother.

Keep_pedalling

You mother can simple leave all her estate to you in the event of your brother pre decreasing her, but in reality she is likely to go first and who he leaves his money too is his buisiness.

The comment about spending her money before the care system gets it is highly misguided, people like your mother are going to be able to get the best care that is available because she can afford it when she feels she needs its, and not have to rely on a cash strapped LA to provide the funds for it, and believe me you have now got to be pretty decrepit before you can get residential care paid for.

getmore4less

2stixoftwix wrote: »

Leaving it to me isn't an option - thats unfair

Trying to put restriction on what he does once it is his is also unfair.

How do you keep it separate from his own wealth without restricting what he does with it?

Why should his chosen partner not be able to benefit from this like you expect yours to.

margaretclare

I don't know your mum's life history, obviously, but it's possible that she grew up with very little and - as you say - likes having money in the bank.

I'm a little older than your mum. No one in my family had one penny-piece to leave anyone, in fact, it was a struggle for some of them to get their funerals paid for.

I like the feeling of having some money in reserve, the feeling that money is there as a back-up. However, that doesn't mean I'm unwilling to spend on things that I want.

About the will, the only thing is to write it in such a way that all the people she wants to inherit are specifically named.

74jax

What if you die, your husband remarries to someone with kids and then leaves any money to them also?

I'm confused.

Your mum leaves her inheritance to who she wants. Her son then leaves his, if any, to who he wants.

iammumtoone

I can see where your Mum is coming from but she is looking at it the wrong way.

Once she has left it/given it to someone, it is no longer her money what that person does with it is up to them.

If she is not happy with what she thinks that person may do with it, then don't leave any to that person. What she has to ask herself is does she trust your brother to write his own will once he receives his inheritance (leaving out his wife!)? if not she either takes her chances that he will spend it all before he dies or doesn't give it to him in the first place.

peachyprice

2stixoftwix wrote: »

Leaving it to me isn't an option - thats unfair
I would be happy for him to a) leave it to a cats home, b) blow it in vegas

Surely it's wrong for step grandchildren to inherit if my mother doesn't want them to

By the time the step grand children would inherit it would no longer be your mother's money. It ceases to be hers the day she dies and she has no control once it becomes your brothers. It's up to HIM what he does with it. It's not difficult to grasp really.

Savvy_Sue

Suggest that your mother goes to speak to a STEP solicitor. I suspect that it's possible to do what she wants, but only by doing something extremely complicated, like setting up a trust for your brother on which he only enjoys the life interest, and when he dies it goes to you / your child(ren). But it won't be cheap, and it won't be easy.

What she CAN do fairly simply is make provision in her will for the potential situation where she lives longer than your brother: "if my son dies before me then his share goes to my daughter." Actually I suspect that even if she doesn't make that explicit, that's where his share would go in the absence of other instructions. But really, your mother needs advice she can rely on.

Incidentally, my parents had clauses in their wills which meant that if any of us had died before them, our children were specifically excluded from inheriting our share. As I understand it, that's not the default position. And these were full-blood grandchildren, who they saw reasonably frequently in some cases, and got regular news about them in other cases. But as pointed out, once the money had passed to each of us, we could do as we liked, and one of my siblings who doesn't have children insisted on making a small gift out of their own share to each nephew and niece when Dad died (before Mum). I'm sure Mum didn't know this had happened: I wasn't about to tell her!

Keep_pedalling

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Suggest that your mother goes to speak to a STEP solicitor. I suspect that it's possible to do what she wants, but only by doing something extremely complicated, like setting up a trust for your brother on which he only enjoys the life interest, and when he dies it goes to you / your child(ren). But it won't be cheap, and it won't be easy.

What she CAN do fairly simply is make provision in her will for the potential situation where she lives longer than your brother: "if my son dies before me then his share goes to my daughter." Actually I suspect that even if she doesn't make that explicit, that's where his share would go in the absence of other instructions. But really, your mother needs advice she can rely on.

Incidentally, my parents had clauses in their wills which meant that if any of us had died before them, our children were specifically excluded from inheriting our share. As I understand it, that's not the default position. And these were full-blood grandchildren, who they saw reasonably frequently in some cases, and got regular news about them in other cases. But as pointed out, once the money had passed to each of us, we could do as we liked, and one of my siblings who doesn't have children insisted on making a small gift out of their own share to each nephew and niece when Dad died (before Mum). I'm sure Mum didn't know this had happened: I wasn't about to tell her!

That might work financially, but goodness knows what impact this would have on family relationships. The OPs brother is certainly not going to be very happy about this and the chances of him blaming his sibling for being behind such a cruel will are very high indeed, and I would not rule out an expensive legal challenge over this.

If I was the OP I would tell my mother to do no such thing and that you are perfectly happy to split the money without reservation. We see enough stupid family disputes over wills on this forum, and this has the potencial to be another one, but at least it is at the stage where it can be prevented.

getmore4less

I think if there is any beyond the grave control to make it fair it should apply to all the money not just some/half of it.

Put the full amount into a trust with blood line beneficiaries fully discretionary is probably best.

But then who are the trustees?

To avoid the money falling into the wrong hands only loans to the children so they have to be paid back on death, or some other trigger.

The more control you put on the trust(ie not full discretionary) the easier it is to get silly situations where there is money needed for something but cannot be accessed.


Of course the real crazy thing here is they are only thinking one generation down.

What happens when the grandkid(OP daughter) goes roage and marries someone with kids.