a theory of relationships

justme111

I have a theory on why good looking people seem to be more often unlucky in love than the average looking ones. It is because they attract more people who are interested in looks rather than in personality and this is not a sound basis for successful relationship . What does the board think ?

gettingtheresometime

Or perhaps they know they're attractive (what ever that means) and a) have high expectations of how they should be treated without giving a moments thought on how to treat people themselves b) are subsequently high maintenance and c) people can't be asked to put up with their behaviour for any length of time

pendragon_arther

There may be some truth in that, however the main point is we gather vast amounts of information unconsciously very quickly and assess our likes and dislikes from that. Women are better at it than men, hence women's intuition. There is a phenomina known as transference, where someone reminds us of a significant other from our past, either physically or psychologically. Within this complexity is the way in which the other person could remind us of certain aspects of ourselves too. Take for instance Rod Stewart who always picks females who look like himself, so a bit of narcissism could be going on.

So to some extent your theory could be correct in some ways but there are more complex issues also going on.

dirty_magic

I think it could be partly because a lot of people won't approach very attractive people in the first place because they think they're out of their league.

There seems to be an assumption that very attractive people will be high maintenance and self obsessed, and I think this puts some people off too.

Person_one

justme111 wrote: »

good looking people seem to be more often unlucky in love than the average looking ones.

What makes you think that's the case?

PasturesNew

The more attractive you are, the easier it is to move on/out because you feel confident you'll quickly find another.

Fat/ugly people have to put up with what they've got as they know they can't get another. So they will go out of their way to be nice, play nice and hold onto what they've got

Jagraf

justme111 wrote: »

I have a theory on why good looking people seem to be more often unlucky in love than the average looking ones. It is because they attract more people who are interested in looks rather than in personality and this is not a sound basis for successful relationship . What does the board think ?

"Good looking" is so subjective that your theory can never be proven. Actually personality is too. And I have no idea how you work out "average looking ones".

Sorry

pigpen

I think your theory is severely flawed.. Some people are horrible regardless of what they look like!

Gloomendoom

Hmmm... I'm no oil painting but it didn't stop my first marriage ending in divorce.

mikeeboy

The problem is that people hook up with people they 'fancy', and then realise 10 years later that they've got nothing in common and get on each others nerves.

They'd be better off making their best mate their life partner.

mellymoo74

I must be hideous then