Would you put up with this from neighbours?

Mardle

http://www.netmums.com/baby/sleep/repetitive-or-rhythmic-behaviour-at-bedtime

Some children unfortunately do bang their cots against the wall. Keep a diary of when the noise occurs as you may then spot a pattern.

AnnieO1234

If the parents were middle class professionals would you have the same opinion? Would you instead consider that they might have been using the "Cry It Out" method? Or indeed that the child isn't suffering from colic or some other such problem?

This is why flats are such a PITA imho. If you are concerned for the welfare of the child, for example if you can see that both it's parents are outside smoking while their child is crying it's heart out for hours on end, then yes call social services or even the police. However if there's the chance that this is simply a couple who are experiencing what it can be like to have a difficult, colicky or otherwise child, then I would maybe suck it up, accept that you live in a flat and invest in some earplugs or white noise machines. xxx

drbluebox

Leo2020 wrote: »

How do you know that they are not trying to console the child? My sister has great difficulty getting her now 10 month old to sleep. I have 2 children and have trouble getting him to sleep - he can scream and scream totally consolable. It is obvious he is tired but he will not admit it and can be a right pain to get him to sleep and then when you do 20 mins later tops he is screaming his head off again. She can spends hours in the evenings with him like that until he finally falls asleep properly.

She has even seen specialist at hospital because she thought he had severe reflux, tried changing his diet, he is on medically prescribed milk for babies with milk allergies and yet he still has trouble sleeping.

In regards to the others noises, could it be maybe a swinging crib? Could bang on the floor if slightly off balance. Maybe pushing the baby back and forth in a pram? You can get seats which vibrate. Swings which swing of course. All these make noises.

It sounds like rocking so maybe right and goes through phases and to be fair the baby rarely cries during the day, but sometimes does sound like someone is dragging furniture about sometimes, and heard drilling a few times over the last few weeks so maybe building baby furniture as the noise came from the living room but other sounds are like something getting dropped, and other times sounds like someone hammering a nail into a wall so thats why I thought it way diy, it may even be diy and its disturbing the child and its crying for attention but one thing is clear it lasts a few hours a day then all of a sudden no noise at all, no cries, no rocking and that just happens to be around 6pm which I assume would be babies bed time?

I wanted to go up and gauge their reactions and be polite so I can see if they are in for one and to mention I can hear the noise as they may not know.

AnnieO1234 wrote: »

If the parents were middle class professionals would you have the same opinion? Would you instead consider that they might have been using the "Cry It Out" method? Or indeed that the child isn't suffering from colic or some other such problem?

This is why flats are such a PITA imho. If you are concerned for the welfare of the child, for example if you can see that both it's parents are outside smoking while their child is crying it's heart out for hours on end, then yes call social services or even the police. However if there's the chance that this is simply a couple who are experiencing what it can be like to have a difficult, colicky or otherwise child, then I would maybe suck it up, accept that you live in a flat and invest in some earplugs or white noise machines. xxx

I did assume that, thats why I didn't go straight round and complain nor report them just in case, I come from a very poor family so know apperances can be decieving, I have lived in properties where the middle class neighbours have been the worst, or on a train when a couple wearing expensive clothes, kid on one Ipad, dad on Iphone and mother on another Ipad alll blasting out music loud as they could whilst laughing and when passing a poorer town they talked about the sort of people who lived there.

They have been there 3 weeks and its the same noises every night though they are far more muffled at night (but that may be because the bedroom walls are thicker or the room being so small)

I came back 10 mintues ago and the light is on not a single sound from baby, sounds like parents are walking about and a car in the parking space that wasn't there when I left.

I assumed the baby was feeding as asked my parents because the noise escalates every 2 hours before it gradually gets clamer then louder again at the 2 hour mark.

But what I noticed is the nights when I struggle to sleep I can hear the baby (muffled) crying the entire time I am trying to sleep, if I wake up in middle of night I hear it crying.

The only time I may of heart comfort by the parents was yesterday when I heard a muffled male voice laughing and saying "calm down" when the noise was as its highest.

To put it into perspective the walls here are thick enough I can put my tv or computer on high, close living room door and barely hear a sound if anything standing outside the door, if I put on washing machine on in kitchen and close the door you only hear a very muffled sound when its on the fastest part of spin at end, even one time I did drink and had music on loud enough I thought the neighbours would hear(as in months ago) I closed the living room door and just heard muffled sounds.

missbiggles1

drbluebox wrote: »

Yes I was thinking maybe I was overreacting, as not to spread stereotypes but they seem to be the type that wear tracksuits all the time and smoke cigarettes and heard them shout at each other on the stairs twice, but at least they smoke outside.

But I was worried if I did report them even if they are neglecting the child they will blame me and get agressive.

Do you actually mean that?:eek:

nubbins

I would ring Jeremy Kyle immediately, he'll know what to do.

drbluebox

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Do you actually mean that?:eek:

In what context? If they were bad to their child I would be more careful about getting them a visit so they didn't suspect me as if I went up to ask about noise and a few days later they get a visit from social services they may get agressive with me and I am classed as a vulnerable person.

I would not ignore a child in danger that being said I am unsure of how social services would work, such as go straight round or send someone to spy on the property.

Kynthia

How young a baby are we talking here? Babies tend to get worse in the evening and cry a lot more. They don't necessarily stop when you try to comfort them as I remember pacing fir ages with my daughter. Some babies have unexplained crying (colic) and the medical definition is where they cry for at least 3 hours a time, at least 3 times a week for at least 3 weeks. Sounds like fun doesn't it, and it's usually in the evenings.

So could they have the baby in a rocking crib or an electric swing which is is explaining the noise? Does the noise accompany the crying? I'd not and the child is actually 6 months plus could they be using a jumperoo which might be noisy through your ceiling?

drbluebox

No idea but under a year as its tiny and has no hair maybe newborn hence them taking the first flat they found (its a awful landlord, manky flat)

I never notice much actual crying during the day just other noises it seems to mostly be when its in bed/night when that just sounds like purely rocking and constant crying.

But the floorboards are creaky enough that you would hear people walking about which I don't hear.

[Deleted User]

If you are concerned enough, call social services. If there is abuse and you go up and register your concern, it won't be taken kindly, particularly if there is an abusive situation.

I had two babies who hardly slept at all, one slept for 30 mins in 48 hours. Both have since been diagnosed with ASD. It didn't matter what I did, and god knows I did everything anyone could think of.., they just didn't sleep well. The noises you are hearing don't necessarily mean the child is being ignored or abused.., but if you are concerned enough, you should phone social services so they can check.

MERFE

I had neighbours that had a crier. 9pm everynight and would go on till passed 11pm, they often took him into their bed which was the other side of the wall from my bed. Before I moved next door to them I already knew them as a family as my daughter and their older son had gone to the same preschool. This helped as I could be pretty sure they were good parents doing their best. My oldest cried herself to sleep for 3 years, no amount of comforting made any difference and now she reads till very late and finds falling to sleep difficult. My other 2 aren't like that. If you are concerned you can ring social services if you aren't concerned then the answer is yes some babies right up to toddlers can cry a lot especially at night. If he doesn't cry during the day I would say the parents must be meeting his needs then, I wouldn't have thought many parents just stop doing that at night if the childs crying but sometimes there is nothing they can do. He could even be particularly
bad atm because of the move, some children, even babies don't handle these well. Maybe go up to welcome them in and do a proper introduction then you may get a feel for what type of person they are.