Two kids,two dogs and a marriage break up.

Pollycat

emzky wrote: »

Thsnkyou all again for such lovely, supportive responses. He's said he's willing to be ammicable about everything. As Ive got a 6month old I'd ideally want to care for her myself than ship her off for someone else to look after so wouldn't be able to pay a mortgage. Not sure if I'd even be able to get benefits when I've got equity in a property. Its only a small amount of equity.He's on a good wage. Over 37pa

Oh yes you will.

Equity in a property is not the same as having savings.
TBH, I don't know the rules about the type of benefits you'll possibly be eligible for and how/if they affect any savings as my friend had no savings at all.
Do you have any savings?

At £37k your husband will probably have to pay a fair amount of child maintenance.

I hope you can manage to keep this amicable.

Do take a look at the benefit/maintenance calculators I gave you the link to - it might set your mind at rest and they're very easy to go through.
I think you may be surprised - you could be entitled to child tax credits, income support, council tax benefit, maybe more.
And there is your child benefit and child maintenance.

elsien

With the best will in the world, these things sometimes only stay amicable until the departing partner realises how much of a chunk of their income and assets they might need to part with.
With a bit of will on both sides you might both be able to manage that, but knowledge is power so find out your rights and entitlement for yourself rather than rely on information from OH which may or may not be entirely correct. As others have said, you may well not need to go down the solicitors route ref negotiating, but they're a good starting point to find out exactly where you stand.

duchy

This is very true

At the moment he feels guilty and wants to do the right thing - by you....and the children.

Fast forward a year and he sees a big chunk of his money going to child support - and you not working and having a comfortable life - whilst he is stuck alone in a flat .....or even meets someone else and wants a bigger home /money to spend and gets quite resentful. Can also happen if you are the first to "move on" and starting dating too (that probably sounds so unlikely to you at the moment - but the time will come)

Far better to settle everything early on whilst everything is at its most co-operative. Trying to find a rental property that welcomes kids , dogs and benefits can be almost impossible so look at staying in the home if you can.

emzky

Thank you so much. I truly am overwhelmed by the help and support of these responses. It means a lot. I certainly have a lot to look into. Which I fully intend to do. I've applied today to a housing association to get on a council housing list as feel this is my only option whilst staying in the property until I've found somewhere. We are both in agreement that the house needs to be sold. Its best for us all as I would like to move closer to my daughter's school so it's within walking distance. Absolutley not prepared to swap her schools. Want to keep something normal to this mess I've found myself in. Thank you again for all the help and advice. You're all amazing x