Pregnant University Student - Partner on Low Income

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kay159 wrote: »

Her boyfriend moved in with us around 5 months ago and my partner hates the situation. He has asked that I tell him to move out on many occasions. I told him if he has a problem he should tell him himself
The issues we have is that my daughter has highly unstable BP and was told that this could cause problems with any preganacy until it was stabilised. We have tried many drugs over the years and have one last one to try which has just been approved but isnt approved during pregnancy. Its all very much a catch 22. I cant begin to explain how I feel. Im a mixed bag of emotions but mostly worried sick for her and the baby. Her dad will not take things well. He doensnt handle anything well and has never really handled her being ill for the last 10 years so all I can see is massive arguements. She thinks I should be happy but I want her to be realistic about how much strain this places on relationships, jobs, studying etc let alone without throwing the illness into the mix. I actually feel like the big bad wolf at the moment huffing and puffing but I want her to explore all options open to her, not just about the pregnancy but health, studying and where she will live
Our house would definitely be out of the question. Her dad works 4am days and hates them having the tv on past 11 when hes trying to get to sleep so a crying baby wont work - I keep telling myself he will feel different because its his grandchild but realistically Im fooling myself and Im sure once the news is public he will not respond well as he wanted so much more for her after everything she has been through
Ive suggested she gets past the 12 weeks scan before telling him but the pressure of it all is really getting to me at the moment
I will tell her to go and speak to the university and see what advice they have - this seems the best place to start as she is adamant she wants to finish the course and maybe do her masters too
Thanks everyone

She's never lived on her own and is now going to be setting up home with a baby.


I think that you need to gently settle her into the idea. (moving before baby born would be a good start)


Whilst I'm quite keen on the sink or swim idea, with the added medical issues - I'd probably not suggest that in this case.