My LO will only settle on her mum at night

dexterwolf

My 7 month old only settles on mum at night. If I try and comfort her when she stirs then she screams until mum holds her. It gets me down as I would like to get her to sleep and give mum a rest . Any ideas ?

dexterwolf

I will add that in the day she is fine with me holding her.

SmlSave

This sounds very familiar to me!

Can you take over the bedtime routine? It won't be easy and it will probably take weeks but if you can persevere your lo will get used to it.

I'd feed them and then DH would do bedtime and try till our kids got distressed/he got angry and then I'd take over. Slowly, very slowly the period he had them got longer and now I'm the one who gets him when they are playing up at night!

No magic fix I'm afraid. Cuddle, hum, walk, rock, offer water, basically keep at it.

kingfisherblue

My granddaughter was the same, and she was waking overnight as well. My poor daughter was exhausted (she leaves for work at 6.30am, so no lie in either!).

Very reluctantly, she tried controlled crying, with her partner doing the bedtime routine first. It was dreadful for them listening to their daughter cry. But....four nights later, my granddaughter was able to settle herself to sleep in her cot, and stopped waking overnight. She was around seven months old at the time. Now, apart from a few odd nights when she has been teething, the little one has been fine.

It's a really difficult time, and as a mum of three non-sleepers, I fully understand. One of my children is disabled and I still get up in the night to see to his needs (every night), but these days, it's only once a night most of the time. Up to a couple of years ago, I was up four times a night, every night, as his medical needs were so great. Fortunately, he does settle quickly and without me being in his room.

Hope it all sorts out quickly for you.

VfM4meplse

dexterwolf wrote: »

My 7 month old only settles on mum at night. If I try and comfort her when she stirs then she screams until mum holds her. It gets me down as I would like to get her to sleep and give mum a rest . Any ideas ?

I've noticed this as well, they seem to like women more.

A soft pillow under your jumper should do the trick, because babies love "boobs". Either that or grow a beer gut pronto and stick your LO on your tum.

olgadapolga

All four of my children went through this at about 7-9 months of age. With mine, it was just a stage that they went through and we found it easier and less distressing to let the parent the child wanted to deal with it and settle them down again. It doesn't last forever, children soon change "allegiance" - my three year old is going through a stage of wanting just Daddy (after three years of just wanting Mummy) so I'm letting them get on with it whilst I attend to other things.

ALIBOBSY

olgadapolga wrote: »

All four of my children went through this at about 7-9 months of age. With mine, it was just a stage that they went through and we found it easier and less distressing to let the parent the child wanted to deal with it and settle them down again. It doesn't last forever, children soon change "allegiance" - my three year old is going through a stage of wanting just Daddy (after three years of just wanting Mummy) so I'm letting them get on with it whilst I attend to other things.

After having 4 one boy 3 girls now aged 5 to 17 we just went with whoever they wanted at the time as it will change and vary over the years. Mind you even tho now they want their dad alot of the time, when they are sick its still mum they want.

TBH its part of parenting you work things between yourselves and as the kids get older things will change naturally, just wait till they want to run around the garden and play stupid games all mums know dads are much better at those

Ali x

giddypenguin

Have you tried some of her clothing? It sounds really silly, but my LO loves being wrapped up in my soft dressing gown and my husband holds her - could be a way to calm things down?

But as others have said don't be offended, it's just a phase :-) x

Kynthia

Is she breastfed as it might be an instinct thing to be near the food supply during the 'long' night? I know one mum would put her t-shirt in the cot to get her baby to settle in there as it had her scent. Does mum usually do the bedtime routine as during the night they like to replicate part of the routine to get back to sleep, so you doing bedtime more would help? Or it could be a temporary preference.