Putting up a taller fence.. How to tell neighbours?

Davesnave

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

On your comment of this being a "cultural gap" - I'm interested to know where this gap lies.

Do you think it's an age thing - ie oldest generation not bothered about garden privacy and our generation (Baby Boomers) downwards does expect privacy? If not - where do you think this gap lies (eg maybe its a Southern English expectation)?

I'm no authority on this, but I'd say it is now a class thing in most cases.

Older Indian members of my extended family might also be seen as over-friendly from a Western perspective. They're used to being in and out of each others houses all day, every day, rather like the close-knit communities in, say, mining villages, in the days when we had those.

People with a higher education are usually competent at taking cues from both speech and body language, just as they are in taking turns, listening and so on. (politicians excepted! )

Davesnave

Snuggles wrote: »

. The neighbours came out, and were hanging over the fence while we were eating and butting in on our conversation. To me that's not a cultural gap - it's just plain rude.

Sounds like a great sketch for Monty Python or The Fast Show, but they'd probably be the last people to enjoy that sort of humour.

moneyistooshorttomention

Davesnave wrote: »

I'm no authority on this, but I'd say it is now a class thing in most cases.

Older Indian members of my extended family might also be seen as over-friendly from a Western perspective. They're used to being in and out of each others houses all day, every day, rather like the close-knit communities in, say, mining villages, in the days when we had those.

People with a higher education are usually competent at taking cues from both speech and body language, just as they are in taking turns, listening and so on. (politicians excepted! )

Ah.....gotcha....down to "If you have the money, then you can afford the privacy". Closely followed by "Even if you haven't got the money - if you have come to expect privacy = you will still be trying to get it".

Not much chance of privacy in closely-packed little houses etc.

bouicca21

I suspect it is a cultural shift. When was I was young, living in what I suppose you'd call an upper working class/lower middle class area, the gardens had 6 foot fences near the house, then the rest of the fences were 2-3 foot chain link. No one really used their gardens in the way we do now. There was a bit of concrete, then a bit of lawn with maybe a swing if the owners had children, but most of the garden was given over to fruit and veg (and at one stage some had had a chicken run).

I was staggered recently to find my old house on zoopla. Nearly half a century on the garden has a lovely patio, and is beautifully and lovingly landscaped. It's a different kind of garden altogether - it's one in which to relax, a garden to be be enjoyed, certainly no longer suitable for Mr Gradgrind.

Jhoney_2

Drew210385 wrote: »

We bought a house about 18 months ago and the garden has a very low 3 ft wall on all 3 sides, making it very open to the 3 neighbouring properties.

We would like to put a fence on top of the walls to give us some privacy (3 ft fence to make a 6 ft height) however, the person who lived in the house before us had been here for 50 years, and the neighbours on either side have been here 35 years and 20 years. I feel terrible for moving in and putting up a big fence when it’s been like this for the past 50 years at least, however we would like some privacy. I’d like to go in the garden and have a quiet drink, and not have to make small talk! Sometimes when other people are in their gardens I don’t even feel like I can go out, I almost feel like I’m intruding as it's so open. Looking down the street from upstairs I can see most gardens have fences, it’s just this 3 in a row do not, which we’re right in the middle of!

I am a sociable person, it’s not about that, and we are very friendly with one side, but after seeing them and chatting almost every single day in the summer it got a bit much. They were outside nearly all the time. I swear I saw them more often than my partner! We don’t want to plant bushes as the garden is not huge and we want to make the best use of the space, and there is concrete/patio around the edges anyway.

We are happy to pay, we are not going to ask anyone to contribute unless someone offers to. Solicitors and land registry had no info re boundaries anyway and said we would need to figure it ourselves.

Even if we just put some trellis and climbers up or something we should still let the neighbours know so we feel like we may as well just put a fence up if we are going to have to have that chat.

But what do you even say? ‘Hiya, we live next door, do you mind if we put a big fence up as we want some privacy. OK thanks, bye.’ Arghh!

Sorry for the ranting. I just don't want anyone to be upset or annoyed with us, I'd hate for that. I love where we live.

I'm with you on this too OP.

When I moved in to my home there was 3ft of what I call chicken wire(?) on each side and a dilapidated low brick wall to the back. No-one was sure who owned which fence.

My neighbour to the left wasn't the erm..... gardening/home maintenance type. There was no way money was going to be forthcoming to erect a fence for her privacy, let alone mine. To the left a well kept garden and a neighbour who wasn't fussed (pensioner).

I elected to put fences on all 3 sides (landscaper put 5ft:mad:) and adopt the right hand side to ensure it was maintained as I would wish it to be. The other neighbour is a keen handyman as well, but I was happy to maintain that one as well without ownership, but he declined.

The only caveat is the age of the neighbours, but that is tempered by the fact that after 20+ years, they can find each other's front door well enough.

Worth mentioning that my actions would have been very different if e.g the RH fence didn't belong to me legally and that could be established.

mumps

We live in a row of 3 detached houses. We are in the middle one, the fence on our left is the responsibility of the neighbour, the fence on the right is the responsibility of the neighbour. They are both responsible for the fences on the otherside of their gardens as there is no one else to be responsible. They both get really huffy about it yet they bought the houses when the were first built and we moved in 12 years later so it is hardly our faulty.

Chailatte91

If you own the walls you don't have to answer to anyone, in my opinion. Why would they need to see in to your garden anyway? Maybe I'm a little harsh however unless they own the land you are well within your rights to put fencing up. Just let them know that you'd like a bit of privacy for when you want to have bbqs etc. No biggie!

Mojisola

mumps wrote: »

We live in a row of 3 detached houses. We are in the middle one, the fence on our left is the responsibility of the neighbour, the fence on the right is the responsibility of the neighbour. They are both responsible for the fences on the otherside of their gardens as there is no one else to be responsible. They both get really huffy about it yet they bought the houses when the were first built and we moved in 12 years later so it is hardly our faulty.

My parents had control over/were responsible for all three fences in their back garden - there were good points about it because they could have matching fences all round and paint them all the same colour.

mumps

Mojisola wrote: »

My parents had control over/were responsible for all three fences in their back garden - there were good points about it because they could have matching fences all round and paint them all the same colour.

One of my neighbours does have nice fences, the other doesn't seem to see the advantage

moneyistooshorttomention

Mojisola wrote: »

My parents had control over/were responsible for all three fences in their back garden - there were good points about it because they could have matching fences all round and paint them all the same colour.

I'm responsible for the boundaries both sides of me one way and another and that's how I prefer it to be - as I can choose what's what. Does make it rather expensive for me, but that's lesser of two evils imo.