Putting up a taller fence.. How to tell neighbours?

PenguinOfDeath

When we move into our place, the back fence was really short and in bad condition, but it was the neighbour's 'side'. To our relief, about six months later they knocked on the door and told us they were putting in a new taller fence. No cake required, just a bit of courtesy!

specialboy

OP, you bought the house not the neighbours, put up a 6 foot fence inside the wall and enjoy your privacy

moneyistooshorttomention

This thread seems to rather prove that its a modern-day expectation to have privacy in our gardens (one which I personally share) and I presume it's come from all those programmes in which we are told about using it as an extra "room". It must be a widespread expectation - as estate agents make a point of mehtioning if a garden has a decent level of privacy.


I've heaved a sigh of relief that my NFH is no longer able to peer in at regular intervals, as they used to do.

Hence automatic assumption that we will put up fences if we decide to do so - though I think its fair enough to just "notify" (not "ask") the neighbours in advance if on good enough terms with them to do so.

Running_Horse

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I must admit that I was sitting there absolutely gobsmacked that those neighbours were allowed to get away with the criminal damage, theft and taking hours of effort to remove their paint splatterings from this posters' house.

The police would have been sent right round to that neighbour to read them the Riot Act and that would have been followed by taking them to Small Claims Court for the money they owed me for my fence and my labour removing their paint.

The Riot Act was repealed in 1967 and probably did not concern itself with fence disputes. The police might respond to such a call, probably to tell you it is a civil matter.

Davesnave

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

This thread seems to rather prove that its a modern-day expectation to have privacy in our gardens...

I think it's neither modern nor unusual to want privacy; it's a cultural thing.

Just like direct sunlight, we can't be sure of it, however, because it's the nature of things to change over time. Trees grow, and trees are cut down, buildings are erected etc etc.

When our unpleasant neighbour came to me and asked that we do not "disturb the wildlife" in the hedge bordering our lower field, he really meant, "If you lay the hedge, you'll be able to look right into my back garden."

He carried on being un-neighbourly. I've laid most of the hedge now. He's grown leylandii, but his only (fabulous) view is on that side, so he has a problem.....:rotfl:

It pays to be nice to your neighbours. In the OP's position, I'd give them notice of what I intended to do and say why, but I'd probably phase it over time to reduce the impact. This is roughly what I did at my old house, and one neighbour contributed gladly to the cost of fencing.

Snuggles

jfdi wrote: »

Our back garden was like that when we moved in, low fences and lots of tall shrubs/small trees for added seclusion.
It was lovely and encouraged lots of wildlife, whilst still giving little gaps (not near the house) for a natter if we wanted.

Cue 2 new lots of neighbours and they both banged up 6ft fences within weeks. Loads of the bushes etc were ripped out, the foundations for the fences killed off half our plants, the spray they painted with (one side) covered half our pots etc and we now have half the garden in permanent shade (east, west garden) added to which we hardly know the people.

Do think carefully before you do it, it can wreck the friendly neighbourhood feel of a street before you know it, although I know it's the thing for total privacy these days!

PS - and I'm 57, but this all happened 15 or 20 years back.

I do agree with this up to a point, but I think it very much depends on your neighbours. I'd be quite happy to say hello and have a bit of a chat but I also want to be left to my own devices sometimes in my own garden. Unfortunately our neighbours don't seem to have any concept of respecting personal space. If we go out in our garden, they appear, and demand constant attention by jabbering on the whole time we are outside, standing right at the fence peering into our garden, commenting on whatever we are doing and generally trying to involve themselves. I wouldn't mind this for a few minutes, but it is constant. The only way we can get away from them is to make excuses and go back inside. I don't even feel I can go out there to do any gardening, as they will literally just stand and watch, even if you try to deflect conversation by giving short answers to their comments. It really is awful, and totally ruins any possible enjoyment of our garden.

Davesnave

Snuggles wrote: »

Unfortunately our neighbours don't seem to have any concept of respecting personal space. If we go out in our garden, they appear, and demand constant attention by jabbering on the whole time we are outside, standing right at the fence peering into our garden, commenting on whatever we are doing and generally trying to involve themselves.

As I said, there's a cultural gap.

It's not that one of you is wrong; you just have different expectations. They think they're being friendly, so would probably consider ignoring you for a while to look stand-offish.

jimbog

Rather than phasing each side at a time I think it would be better to do all three sides at once so that no individual neighbour feels slighted

moneyistooshorttomention

Davesnave wrote: »

As I said, there's a cultural gap.

It's not that one of you is wrong; you just have different expectations. They think they're being friendly, so would probably consider ignoring you for a while to look stand-offish.

On your comment of this being a "cultural gap" - I'm interested to know where this gap lies.

Do you think it's an age thing - ie oldest generation not bothered about garden privacy and our generation (Baby Boomers) downwards does expect privacy? If not - where do you think this gap lies (eg maybe its a Southern English expectation)?

Snuggles

Davesnave wrote: »

As I said, there's a cultural gap.

It's not that one of you is wrong; you just have different expectations. They think they're being friendly, so would probably consider ignoring you for a while to look stand-offish.

Whilst I agree they no doubt think they are being friendly, you would expect people to pick up on social cues at some point! I do absolutely nothing to encourage them and sometimes find it difficult to hide my irritation with them, yet they persist. Surely most people want some degree of privacy in their own garden? I remember when my in laws were visiting one day (we don't see them often) and we were eating lunch in the garden. The neighbours came out, and were hanging over the fence while we were eating and butting in on our conversation. To me that's not a cultural gap - it's just plain rude.