I have started volunteering, but still can't get damn job!

Hedylogos

I am certainly not trying to troll. I have come here for advice and i probably shouldn't have started so many threads. I have been in my head a lot. I was on medication for my mental health issues and then i came off them, but my lack of motivation spiralled out of control and caused my anxiety and depression. I was on propranolol for my anxiety issues as i was suffering from bad panic attacks so was on 80mg dosage. The doctor treated me for the anxiety issues but didn't so much for the depression. He mentioned getting exercise and eating healhty, but i was only issued medication for my anxiety attacks. Mental health runs in the family on my mother's side and this is probably where i have got it from.

As for the work, i admit i probably should have tried to do more but my lack of motivation and confidence has been so low. I just felt and still do feel like it's an uphill struggle now because of the years out of employment. Some days i just feel like what's the point because i feel my life is wasted and i will just be working in a dead end job for the rest of my life, even though i want more. i didn't want to go back to the doctors nay more because it's embarrassing to admit how i feel so i have just refused to go back and instead i want to try concentrate on volunteering and keep on applying for jobs. I have been slacking because i haven't felt in the mood for much recently, but i need to start applying to more jobs in the coming days. I have volunteering on Thursday so until then i will send out more applications.

Hedylogos

suki1964 wrote: »

I'm calling WUM

6 months on here and all his posts are about him ( other then just one)

He logs on, does the woe is me post,gives the ones who pander to him some more sob story, then logs off

Couple of weeks later he does the same

And again and again


Not one bit of advice or offer of a job has he taken up and when he's not baiting on here, he's doing the same on the marriage relationship board

Now I'd love to be proved wrong because I'm one of the ones who have done my best to offer good sound advice

There isn't much for me to say now. I have looked over what people have posted and all i can do is try and use their advice, but i found volunteering (which people suggested) and i wasn't claiming JSA. I have recently applied for it again because i wanted to come off it to try find a job, but then decided i should stay on it. I don't want to claim JSA tbh. Any advice you have posted i appreciate.

Hedylogos

I just need to get on with things and not keep posting here. I know by now what i need to do, i just need to pick myself up and do it. Nothing is really going to come of continually posting.

topaztiger1983

My advice is that you should at least try to thank people who have given you some advice or tried to help motivate you, I totally understand about Mental issues, I have suffered from anxiety & depression as well but i found that working helped me

prosaver

try a teacher assistant course
loads of people get jobs after that

suki1964

Hedylogos wrote: »

I just need to get on with things and not keep posting here. I know by now what i need to do, i just need to pick myself up and do it. Nothing is really going to come of continually posting.

You are right, nothing changes if nothing changes

Tour GP gave you good advice, get out the house and exercise. Exercise and fresh air are proven to lift low moods. It also stops you sitting indoors procrastinating

Please please please, go find a job, any menial low paid job that will take you. Any job is better then sitting there wallowing. Working will give you a sense of worth. Even our dishwashers love their jobs and take pride in them and in return are respected and treated and paid the same as the waiting/bar staff. They turn up on time, keep themselves looking smart, can be there till long after midnight and still rock in to do another long shift the following day

Once you have a job, you can get another. It's easier to get a job if you are already in one. And use the time you are in low paid jobs to get your GCSEs in at least Maths and English at evening classes

The writing, song writing, etc, they are hobbies until you have earned enough to persue them

BigAunty

Hedylogos wrote: »

i didn't want to go back to the doctors nay more because it's embarrassing to admit how i feel so i have just refused to go back.

It's a real shame to see how pride and humiliation, or perhaps a better way to describe it is low self esteem, is getting in the way of seeking help. Your decision not to seek help from the GP when your symptoms may have caused you to suffer again.

The GP is there to serve you. They provide a general health service. Sure some GPs probably don't have great social skills or empathy but most will.

This reminds me of the way you signed off claiming JSA despite not finding work because you thought it would motivate you (and I think because you found the process demeaning).

JSA job seeking does sound like it can be a quite harsh and impersonal process. But it's your right to claim even if somehow you don't feel you deserve it.

I hope you can find a way to stop feeling ashamed of using these services. You can still define yourself as vulnerable without feeling that this makes you automatically unworthy of help.

You've popped back and quite clearly explained the obstacles that you face and your issues, so hopefully other posters will get a wider perspective on your lack of progress and continue to motivate you with constructive criticism, rather than making you feel worse.

So you should free to post and hopefully you will get inspiring posts rather than ones that make you feel rejected.

Hedylogos

topaztiger1983 wrote: »

My advice is that you should at least try to thank people who have given you some advice or tried to help motivate you, I totally understand about Mental issues, I have suffered from anxiety & depression as well but i found that working helped me

I have thanked people, or at least i have tried. I try thank people in one post as opposed to multi quoting folks. I do really appreciate people's advice, if i saw them in person i would tell them so lol. I just been in my head a lot and things have been getting me down recently with lack of social life and looking for work etc. I just feel quite exhausted about everything, but i have days like this and then tomorrow i will most likely feel better.

Hedylogos

suki1964 wrote: »

You are right, nothing changes if nothing changes

Tour GP gave you good advice, get out the house and exercise. Exercise and fresh air are proven to lift low moods. It also stops you sitting indoors procrastinating

Please please please, go find a job, any menial low paid job that will take you. Any job is better then sitting there wallowing. Working will give you a sense of worth. Even our dishwashers love their jobs and take pride in them and in return are respected and treated and paid the same as the waiting/bar staff. They turn up on time, keep themselves looking smart, can be there till long after midnight and still rock in to do another long shift the following day

Once you have a job, you can get another. It's easier to get a job if you are already in one. And use the time you are in low paid jobs to get your GCSEs in at least Maths and English at evening classes

The writing, song writing, etc, they are hobbies until you have earned enough to persue them

This is the thing, i haven't enough money to pursue writing courses or anything like that at the moment so for now i just need work so i can do this.

Do you work in a restaurant? I think i remember you mentioning that.

Yeah i am going to start applying for jobs after i've had a shower tonight and some more tomorrow. I don't mind doing anything, i just hope to hear something soon because i don't wanna be on benefits and i also want to start doing various courses.

I know you and a few others have been on my back and given me some stick (or hard love lol) and i do really appreciate it. I just need to do this for myself and get back into the swing of things. I think you're right about the exercise and fresh air, i've been spending too much time at home in between my volunteering. I think i need to look for another day or couple days of volunteering either somewhere else or increase the days at the library. I think being at home is why i am always over-thinking and posting too much on here.

Hedylogos

BigAunty wrote: »

It's a real shame to see how pride and humiliation, or perhaps a better way to describe it is low self esteem, is getting in the way of seeking help. Your decision not to seek help from the GP when your symptoms may have caused you to suffer again.

The GP is there to serve you. They provide a general health service. Sure some GPs probably don't have great social skills or empathy but most will.

This reminds me of the way you signed off claiming JSA despite not finding work because you thought it would motivate you (and I think because you found the process demeaning).

JSA job seeking does sound like it can be a quite harsh and impersonal process. But it's your right to claim even if somehow you don't feel you deserve it.

I hope you can find a way to stop feeling ashamed of using these services. You can still define yourself as vulnerable without feeling that this makes you automatically unworthy of help.

You've popped back and quite clearly explained the obstacles that you face and your issues, so hopefully other posters will get a wider perspective on your lack of progress and continue to motivate you with constructive criticism, rather than making you feel worse.

So you should free to post and hopefully you will get inspiring posts rather than ones that make you feel rejected.

It's okay, i dont take the criticism to heart because deep down i know some of them are correct. I always question myself about things because i want better for myself and i get frustrated when i see others doing well and i wish to be like them too. I don't want to rely on medication to get me better, i did it before and i think i have got over my panic attacks. I do get mild attacks, but nothing i cannot cope with. I am no longer on medication and this is why i refuse to go back on them.

I think Suki is right in saying fresh air and exercise is a good idea because i only volunteer 4 hours 2 days a week and then i just head home after, so i need to start going for walks or just take a walk around town otherwise being stuck at home just doesn't help. I sit down to write at home, but then i get inside my head and start thinking about finding a job, money, career etc and can't concentrate on writing. This is why i think getting out will do me good.

Thanks for the advice. I definitely am thankful for it :beer: