The neighbour's cat - quandary

TBeckett100

We recently moved to a new build and one night when we came home, a rather friendly cat appeared and started meowing. He/she was very affectionate and we stroked it. We went in and thought nothing more about it.

A few nights later at 10pm, we heard the cat meowing at our door. It didn't come in but we stroked it (my daughter is 6 and loves cats). I decided to give it some milk, left the bowl outside and shut the door.

The cat kept coming back at 10pm (presume it must be when the owner boots it out for the night) and I started feeding it high end cat food.

Now the cat appears every morning at 7.30am. I open the door, it runs in and I feed it.

At this point we had no idea who owned the cat and it just happened when the wife and child were leaving one morning for the school run, the cat ran out of the house at the precise moment the owner walked past.

A conversation was had that went along the lines of "don't feed the cat as he is a master of food begging" "We now have a dog and they dont get on and we cant rehome him as he is 13 and nobody wants potential vet bills".

The cat still appears but the Mrs wants us to ignore it. I am still up for feeding it as I quite enjoy having a foster cat without the destruction/smells that pet ownership comes with.

Question is, should we ignore it or continue to feed it?

pollyanna24

TBeckett100 wrote: »

We recently moved to a new build and one night when we came home, a rather friendly cat appeared and started meowing. He/she was very affectionate and we stroked it. We went in and thought nothing more about it.

A few nights later at 10pm, we heard the cat meowing at our door. It didn't come in but we stroked it (my daughter is 6 and loves cats). I decided to give it some milk, left the bowl outside and shut the door.

The cat kept coming back at 10pm (presume it must be when the owner boots it out for the night) and I started feeding it high end cat food.

Now the cat appears every morning at 7.30am. I open the door, it runs in and I feed it.

At this point we had no idea who owned the cat and it just happened when the wife and child were leaving one morning for the school run, the cat ran out of the house at the precise moment the owner walked past.

A conversation was had that went along the lines of "don't feed the cat as he is a master of food begging" "We now have a dog and they dont get on and we cant rehome him as he is 13 and nobody wants potential vet bills".

The cat still appears but the Mrs wants us to ignore it. I am still up for feeding it as I quite enjoy having a foster cat without the destruction/smells that pet ownership comes with.

Question is, should we ignore it or continue to feed it?

So they've asked you not to feed it?
They now have a dog and can't rehome the cat?

If they don't want the cat as they now have a dog, why do they have a problem with you effectively taking over ownership? And what do they expect the cat to do if they don't want it anymore? Starve?

Torry_Quine

As the owner has specifically said not to feed the cat it would be wrong to keep feeding it.

It seems you want to good bits of having a cat without the negative, would the owner let you have the cat?

fairy_lights

The owner hasn't said they no longer want the cat though - just that it doesn't get on with the dog. If you do get the impression they want to get rid of it then by all means ask the question, but be prepared that they might say no.
For future reference though, you really shouldn't start putting food out for random cats that rock up on your doorstep, they are very good at acting like pathetic hungry orphans but rarely are, and might even be on special diets for medical conditions so feeding an unknown cat can be harmful for them.

Person_one

Obviously stop feeding the cat, but you knew that of course.

pinkteapot

Respect their wishes and don't feed it. It'll be getting fed at home and you risk over-feeding and therefore causing weight problems.

Does cat show any signs of wanting to come inside? If so, you could ask the neighbour if they mind if you let it come in for a bit occasionally. We did this at our old house (before we had our own cat). Our next-door neighbour worked a shift pattern that meant some weeks he was barely home. His cat was a very affectionate lap-cat and ended up spending half his time round ours if we were in. We didn't feed him - he just liked coming in for cuddles and play. Our neighbour knew and if we ever heard the neigbour calling the cat in then we'd give him back of course (plus neighbour knew where to knock first if the cat ever vanished!).

If their cat is starting to avoid their house because of the dog, they may be happy for it to spend time in a neighbour's house, where it'll be safer than roaming the streets. But again, if they say no - don't let him in - then respect their wishes. Some cat-owners are understandably not keen on neighbours semi-stealing their cats.

I feel sorry for kitty. Older cats often just want to curl up at home more so I feel sorry for him if he's being pushed out by a dog. We have our current cat due to the same situation - owner had the cat, got a dog, couldn't get them to get along, so rehomed the cat to us.

GwylimT

Giving the cat milk and new food is essentially guaranteed to cause the runs, this will cause painful bloating and could lead to dehydration.

If you want a cat to feed, get a cat.

krlyr

You may be interested to consider it from "the neighbour"'s POV, a similar previous post... https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5342393

In your case, I might enquire about whether they'd rehome to you - they could potentially have been hinting to test the waters? But if they're not interested, I would respect their wishes and stop feeding the cat. You never know, it may have or develop a medical condition meaning you're doing more harm than good feeding it (also bear in mind most cats are lactose-intolerant, so milk isn't the best for them)

fierystormcloud

TBeckett100 wrote: »

We recently moved to a new build and one night when we came home, a rather friendly cat appeared and started meowing. He/she was very affectionate and we stroked it. We went in and thought nothing more about it.

The cat kept coming back at 10pm (presume it must be when the owner boots it out for the night) and I started feeding it high end cat food.

Now the cat appears every morning at 7.30am. I open the door, it runs in and I feed it.

At this point we had no idea who owned the cat and it just happened when the wife and child were leaving one morning for the school run, the cat ran out of the house at the precise moment the owner walked past.

A conversation was had that went along the lines of "don't feed the cat as he is a master of food begging" "We now have a dog and they don't get on and we cant rehome him as he is 13 and nobody wants potential vet bills".

The cat still appears but the Mrs wants us to ignore it. I am still up for feeding it as I quite enjoy having a foster cat without the destruction/smells that pet ownership comes with.

Question is, should we ignore it or continue to feed it?

Well of course you shouldn't be feeding this cat if you don't want him to keep coming to you.

But what I am shocked about, and don't understand why people are not making more of an issue of it, is that the owners of the cat have just booted him out because 'the new dog doesn't get on with him!' What horrible, callous, dreadful people these sound!

They have a cat for 13 years, and then get a new dog and chuck the cat out?! God help that dog if they get another dog and it doesn't get on with this dog they have now!

If it were me, I would be contacting the RSPCA - sharpish! You can't just boot your pet out into the winter because he 'doesn't fit into the family any longer,' and you can't rehome him.

So contact the RSPCA now, and report these callous individuals. And maybe they can re-home the cat too. Unless you want him of course... But report them to the RSPCA anyway...for abandoning the cat.

fairy_lights

fierystormcloud wrote: »

But what I am shocked about, and don't understand why people are not making more of an issue of it, is that the owners of the cat have just booted him out because 'the new dog doesn't get on with him!' What horrible, callous, dreadful people these sound!

Where does the OP say his neighbours have booted the cat out?! They may have said they couldn't rehome him because of his age but that doesn't mean they would kick him out, or even that they would seriously consider giving him away. If they've warned OP off feeding him then they're obviously feeding and caring for mog themselves. And turning up at OP's door at ten pm doesn't mean they're chucking him out for the night either, that might just be the time he goes out, especially if he's old and set in his routine.
Calling the RSPCA would be a massive overreaction, unless there's more to the story that gives OP cause for concern.

Deep_In_Debt

fierystormcloud wrote: »

Well of course you shouldn't be feeding this cat if you don't want him to keep coming to you.

But what I am shocked about, and don't understand why people are not making more of an issue of it, is that the owners of the cat have just booted him out because 'the new dog doesn't get on with him!' What horrible, callous, dreadful people these sound!

They have a cat for 13 years, and then get a new dog and chuck the cat out?! God help that dog if they get another dog and it doesn't get on with this dog they have now!

If it were me, I would be contacting the RSPCA - sharpish! You can't just boot your pet out into the winter because he 'doesn't fit into the family any longer,' and you can't rehome him.

So contact the RSPCA now, and report these callous individuals. And maybe they can re-home the cat too. Unless you want him of course... But report them to the RSPCA anyway...for abandoning the cat.

I agree with all of your post.

It makes me so cross when people get a new pet with no regard for the existing one they have and then just abandon their original pet because it doesn't get on with the new pet.

Definitely get in touch with RSPCA or CPL and see if they can take the cat if you don't want him.

This just makes my blood boil.