Where do I start with it all?!

SandeC

Many thanks Sourcrates. Looks like I'm going to have to get my thinking cap on - I can remember a few that are no longer on the file, but I know there are more!

I've spoken to my mum and explained to her the depth of the situation, and told her of the advice all you lovely people have given me. She's going to help me with the £90 application fee for the DRO should it be needed. Not sure when I'm going to get time to go to the CAB due to work commitments (really not in a position to take any time off at the moment!), so I think StepChange will be a more suitable route.

I used the budget tool on this site, and it seems my monthly overspend is around £77. As I'm not using any credit to cover this, it means that this is how much I'm 'borrowing' from my mum every month - much more than the £10-£20 my head was telling me it was, and most definitely something that needs to stop now.

Will be getting an appointment to see my GP sometime this week to discuss a medication review and talking therapy options.

This site has been a real eye-opener over the last few days, and I'm finding something new to think about every time I come on here, which is amazing. Thank you all so much!!

enthusiasticsaver

Well done on tackling your debt problems and feeling more in control of your finances will definitely help with your depression. I have had some training in debt counselling and the first thing we always say to people who have money issues is to step back and analyse clearly who you owe money to and when you have difficulty making payments contact them asap to make another arrangement then they are less likely to take you to court and incur further costs.


As you don't have a mortgage but do have rent, then obviously that is your first priority, after that is council tax because the implications of paying that are serious but you can spread it over 12 months rather than 10 to keep the payments lower. Can you look into paying your tv licence monthly rather than yearly or are you doing that anyway? How do you pay electricity, gas and water or is that all included in your rent?


You have filled out a budget so that is a good start and a monthly overspend of approx. £70-£80 is not too bad. Look at the money saving forums for ideas where to save that from. Also keep a spending diary to help you think twice about where you spend your money and on what. That means that once you have your DRO in place you will be in a good position to move on from this stage.


Good luck.

SandeC

Thanks enthusiasticsaver

I pay the TV license monthly, and always manage to miss DDs at some point due to not keeping track of everything that's going on. I really am terrible at managing my money I have gas and electricity meters so it's all done by card and key, which really is a god-send! I don't even want to think about water, although I'm going to have to at some point. I owe them an awful lot of money

At the moment most of my monthly bills are spread through the month, and often this tends to mean that once I've paid the bills for a particular week I just spend the remaining money, and then don't have enough for the following week. Sometimes I can be really good at managing it - others I can put myself weeks, if not months, behind, if I'm having a particularly low stage. I have thought about having them all go out in one go so that I can work out a weekly cost and put it into a savings account, and then transfer it back into my main account the day before they're due to go out. I think keeping a diary is a great idea!

Many thanks again.

thegreenone

What about opening another bank account, as Fatbelly suggested. Leave your salary going in and your bills going out of the current one. Leave a little bit extra in and then transfer the remainder to the new account. Cut up or give the debit card for your current account to your Mum. Do not touch it. You will then be able to see exactly how much you have each month/week for food etc. in the new one.


I've only just done this, this week so can't report yet how it will work but I'm determined. Only one debt but desperately need to save!


Good luck, you will do it

SandeC

Something else I'm going to be looking at doing this week! I read an article on 'piggybanking' on here this afternoon, and it's something that I'm going to be trying to make routine if I can. Hopefully I'll have time to make it to the bank after work to set up a basic bank account, as you can only apply in branch. My to-do list is growing and growing!

DreamerHelen

Hi There, it sounds like you have made some positive steps forwards....and speaking to your Mum was a great idea as she can now help to support you emotionally and be with you....


Just to say - I opened a Basic Bank Account with the Halifax over the Phone and they didn't need me to sign anything - They verified my Identity over the phone....


Just do make sure that whoever you open a Basic Account with that you don't owe them any money....because I think technically they can take that out of your Account if you owe them money....


Well Done...you're doing awesome!! xXx

YORKSHIRELASS

Hi and welcome

I think most of us around here have either been in denial, or just been in a complete mess with our finances at some stage. The trouble is that you dont want to face it, so you worry, that makes it harder to face it, so you worry more. And on and on it goes.

If you take control it makes you feel better, no matter how bad it looks on paper. Its only money and there is always a solution. I have no experience with older debts but I am sure someone can advise you.

Whatever you do next start keeping proper records of where your money goes. I found that seeing it all written down made it real and made me stop frittering money away. I learnt to budget properly, it took some time but if I learnt to do it considering the mess I was in anyone can!

There may not be an instant solution for you, there wasnt for me and money is still really tight, but just feeling that you are in charge makes you a lot happier.

Good luck.

SandeC

Thanks DreamerHelen and YORKSHIRELASS

I managed to set up a cash account online with TSB. I didn't think I'd get one as I had one a while back but defaulted on it and it closed. But I paid it back so I guess that's why they've let me have another one

With regards to the TV License, I went online a few weeks ago to try and sort it out, but they wanted £48 upfront to continue paying £24 monthly, and I just didn't have the money at the time, so I was planning on doing it this coming Friday. I've been back online again today and monthly payments are no longer an option as I've missed too many payments, but I was able to set up a quarterly DD. I have to pay £75 at the beginning of December, but that will be fine because I'll put the £50 that I was going to use (and hopefully a little more) into my shiny new 'Bills Account' (I love that you can rename accounts online!) and then I just need to find the rest the following week. Then the payments drop to £36 with one at the end of January and April. After that I'll be getting a revised payment schedule, so I'll try and see if I can go back to monthly payments. For now though, I've treated myself to a cheap 2016 diary and written the payment dates and amounts in there

So thats two ticks off my list today. Tomorrow I'll begin to switch the DDs. I'll leave the rent where it is though as it goes out weekly on payday anyway, and it's gone by the time I wake up, so no chance to spend it

I totally agree that taking control makes you feel better, I really do think I've FINALLY had my LBM! Feeling so much better already, just by taking a few simple steps - haven't even begun on the big stuff yet. Can't wait to get on the phone to StepChange - need to make sure I have as many debts as possible on the list first, I don't want to miss any out if I can help it! Thank you all soooo much! X

Saver-upper

Hi SandeC,
I don't have any advice,but I just wanted to say that I can "feel" your change in mood just by reading this thread.You are just sounding so much more positive.If you don't mind,I will follow this thread,and look forward to you posting,on 12-11-16 "Tomorrow I turn 30 and things are looking up-in fact,they are fantastic :j:j:j." (Don't forget the jumpy smiley men ).

lynnejk

Hi Sandec


Just found your thread and wanted to wish you success in endeavours


I was in a very poor state in 2008 and know how frightening it is. You feel you are the only person in such a mess and wonder how you are ever going to get out of it. It seems an impossible hill ahead of you and want to just put it out of your mind, hoping that if you can't see it then it will vanish. However, you know that it won't.


It sounds like you have already made a good start. Now you have another account, and can set aside the monies for your necessary bills, you will be able to stop things getting worse. It's great that your mother is able to help you with getting things organised - she sounds super !


Once you have set up agreements for repaying your debts you will be able to see exactly how much you have left for spending on food etc. Don't try to repay too much too soon or will run yourself into problems again. Your creditors will be happy that you are repaying them something on a regular basis, even if it's only a small amount.


I think it's fantastic you have found this site, as you will get all the help and advice you want somewhere in the forums. Many people here have been 'there' in the past and understand. Please feel free to ask if you need to know anything.


I'll be following your progress, so let us know how you are getting on when you can.


All the very best to you and your sprog
Lx