Looking after Grandchild

System

Must admit i had to put my foot down when my daughter went back to work. It was joked about early on in her pregnancy that i'd be having the baby whilst she went back to work. However, i soon found that it wasnt a joke. I do have him one day a week and the occasional all nighter but any more than that is too much.

If he's ill i'll have him rather than my daughter having to have time off work. If i'm ill but standing i'll have him but no more than that. His other Nanny has him 2 half days too and he goes to nursery one half day.

Our routine goes something like this.

8am he arrives and grizzles because he's tired.

10am bath time and cuddle whilst he gets dressed whilst watching Cbeebies.

12pm bed time

2pm or thereabouts he will wake and we will have dinner.

3pm a walk with the dogs or to the shop (weather permitting)

4pm i'm flagging by then but he's usually happy to play by himself by now. He loves to play in my cupboards (the safe ones). Dangerous ones are firmly secured. I'll read him a book or he will watch a bit of Cbeebies.

5pm depending on the time Daddy picks him up but i usually give him his tea.

I find having him hard work but rewarding and no i dont get paid.

Diamond_Orchid

You are very generous looking after your grandchild for so long and so often.

My mother in law kindly had our son for 2 days a week while I went back to work full time.
I was working p/time but discussed with her prior and she agreed, so I was able to go full time.

However, for my unborn daughter, they have already said they cannot do it again and this is fine. They are of an age now where they have disposable income and fairly fit and healthy still, so want to go on holiday etc without responsibilities.

She has saved us a lot of money, but would never have accepted anything financially towards it. She didn't go out with my son as not confident driving, but he would play in the house or they'd go shopping etc when granddad free. She was happy to cover food costs; we supplied wipes, clothes etc.

We don't ask them to babysit as they don't live close, plus don't want to take advantage. I know she misses my son a lot now he doesn't go.
She looked after her other two grandkids a lot when they were younger, perhaps to the point of being taken advantage of, but we have been careful not to push her into anything.

I will only return to work p/time once my maternity leave ends as cannot afford the full time childcare costs. Thankfully my son is at school now, but with working full time he needs breakfast club and afterschool club, so still a few hundred a month. I couldn't have this plus the £500+ required for my daughter and walks for my dog. That would be £1k a month and my wages gone.

maman

Personally I was still working full time and long hours when my DGDs were pre-school age so couldn't help. I did look after the eldest before and after school a couple of days a week for a while but DD had a contingency plan where childminder could take over if I wasn't available for any reason.


My brother has his DGS one day including overnight every week and he loves every minute of it although it wears him out. Only yesterday he was asking how to tell DIL he doesn't want food sent as LO (almost 2yrs) looks longingly at what everyone else is eating. My SIL has done one day a week for all her 4 grandchildren in turn as a mixture of saving them money and giving parents a break. She offered but has been firm with just one day and some weekend babysitting for special occasions.


So, in all cases I know of the grandparents had a choice and offered to do what they wanted and no more.


OP hasn't really explained why she offered to have this grandchild all day every day. I'm assuming it's to save money for the parents but not sure what changes in January. I suppose there will be some free childcare available when child reaches 3 so maybe that's the significance.


Whatever happens, plans need to be made now otherwise resentment will continue building.