How can we Protect my Sister's Inheritance

DandelionPatrol

thorsoak wrote: »

Is there a possibility that you could set up a Trust for her? With you and her brother as the sole trustees? With income only for her (and any children that she may have?)

Unfortunately, unless the will specifies or enables that the money goes to a trust, there is no real mechanism or justification to set up a trust. Any attempt to put the money into a trust outwith the letter of the will would rightly be viewed as an unjustified attempt to control the money of an adult and would most probably be struck down.

About the only hope of setting up a trust as far as I can see would be to do a deed of variation on the will. Crucially, this would require the sister to sign. Good solid legal advice required for this.

DigForVictory

I'm sorry you are (all) in such unhappy times.

Short term, when the estate needs to be sorted, stash it in the probate account for as long as possible.

Medium term (oddly, starting today) get your sister help - and if that means dragging her to the hospice where a counselor can meet up with her whilst her mother is gradually breathing her last - think mum would understand & approve. She may still think her marriage is normal - and as siblings and males you are on a sticky wicket trying to say it isn't - you need a third party with no axe to see and say. Or leave open this webpage open on a tablet he can't review. Maybe even ask the Scottish care home pastoral team to have a chat.

Long term, this isn't your problem, it's (initially) hers. I agree with you that from what you've said the situation sucks, but unless you start some serious legal fandancing, that third is hers and if she chooses to let him blue it, then that's her (unfortunate) choice.

If he then scampers off in to the blue yonder leaving her terrified & destitute & looking to you for help? It's called family. There is no crystal ball & shoving him off a cliff, whilst it may seem tempting, would not resolve her belief in him (and any other relationship she may form). Do what you can to get help to her and keep as much of it off his radar as possible. Offspring meetings to discuss care of mum? Even he would be pushed to deny her that and still look saintly, but unless she's ready to accept that not only is she shortly to loose her mother she'd be happier to loose her spouse first, you are pushing at a closed door.

Right now, while she believes in him, you can do terrifyingly little to protect another adult of sound mind.

967stuart

Maybe you could just stay out of your sisters business and focus on your own life?
obviously your sister is married to this guy and they are together.

willieormandsheroes

Thanks @DfV - will look into a Probate Account. I don't know what these are and what they are for. My brother will be executor of my mum's estate as well as having power of attorney.

Everything else you say is pretty much how it is - and how I see it. Not too much we can do without our sis's agreement - and she'll struggle to keep anything she does with us from him. For instance -he doesn't let her have a mobile phone as he wants to hear everything she says to us - and the landline is the only way to do that. He had my mobile number blocked from their landline as he didn't want me to be able to call her and speak to her - saying that I was upsetting her (I had been telling her how my brother and I saw her situation and trying to advise her).

All not very nice at all - and as much as my brother and I might despair at my sister she's had a tough life - things have never gone her way - but she is a nice and decent person but has never got any breaks and is often her own worst enemy.

But when my mum goes my sister has an opportunity - even in her early 50s - to make a start on a better life. That's all we want for her but are struggling to see how we can do it given the circumstances as I've outlined.

I'll add - as I haven't mentioned it as it might have complicated things further or irrelevant - my brother-in-law is disabled and my sister is his legal carer - and so she feels (and has) a responsibility to him that makes it difficult for her to walk away - despite how badly he treats her. I have to add that my brother and I are very suspicious about aspects of his disability and that he overdoes his dependence upon our sister as a controlling mechanism (so they never go out of the house unless he lets her)

willieormandsheroes

Yes @967stuart we could - and it would be very easy for us to do that if we thought only of ourselves and indeed how much hassle and worry she caused our parents over many. many years. But they never stopped loving her,

Also we recognise that our sister is not a strong person, has had a rubbish life - and the eventual loss of our mum gives her an opportunity she would be unable or too frightened to grasp without our help and support.

But we know that we can't really force her to do anything - and as with everything that has happened to her through life - she's made her bed - she may choose to lie in it.

pmlindyloo

Much depends on what your sister wants to do.

Have you spoken to her about what she is going to do with the money?

You may have your sister's best interests at heart but in the end unless you can prove that she is vulnerable and being controlled by her husband then there is little you can do.

If (and this is a big if) your sister does not want the money then she can agree to a variation of the will and relinquish her share.

http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/money/experts/article-2918385/Can-share-father-s-estate-children-instead.html

Not exactly the same scenario but the advice contains what she would need to do.

Obviously you cannot do this for her.

The crux of the matter is what your sister wants to do with the money.

willieormandsheroes

Thanks all for the kind thoughts and words of advice. I had a long telephone conversation with my sister this morning - asking her to really think through her situation and be honest with herself about it - I gave her a Women's Aid contact telephone number. Just had a call from her and Women's Aid absolutely confirmed by feelings - and so my sister is now off to call Legal Aid Scotland to dfind out how she can instigate proceedings.

Interesting piece of advice she was given by Women's Aid was that opening a joint bank account with either myself or my brother, would prevent her husband having access to any money in that account. Not sure how that actually works.

Anyway - let's see how things pan out.

SuzieSue

If she isn't divorced by the time she inherits the money, any divorce settlement will probably say that he is entitled to a share of it especially if her husband is disabled.

It would be possible for all 3 of you as beneficiaries of the will to ask a solicitor to draw up a deed of variation within 2 years of your mother's death so that your sister's share is left to you and your brother. Once she is divorced, you could give her her share of the estate.

However, I am not a lawyer, and I am not sure if this would be acceptable in a divorce court, although I cannot see why not.

It would also mean that she would have to trust you and your brother completely and unfortunately, money does strange things to people and can split up families.

willieormandsheroes

Seems like a good idea. Fortunately both my brother and I are relatively well off and have no need for her share - not that that makes much difference for some folks

Mojisola

SuzieSue wrote: »

It would be possible for all 3 of you as beneficiaries of the will to ask a solicitor to draw up a deed of variation within 2 years of your mother's death so that your sister's share is left to you and your brother. Once she is divorced, you could give her her share of the estate.

I would check with an experienced divorce solicitor first.