Consent order breach??

System

As you have invoked CSA then the chances of DD2 getting money at Uni are drastically reduced as the consent order is now dead in the water so it will be up to good will only

anna_1977

Yep I am aware of that but it's more important that he pays for the youngest as I can't manage financially without his money. DD2 has a car and insurance that Need paying for

System

DD2 should get a part time job to cover the car and insurance like other 18 year olds do.

Brighton_belle

!!!!!! wrote: »

DD2 should get a part time job to cover the car and insurance like other 18 year olds do.

That has no bearing on her father suddenly refusing to help feed or clothe her like an decent normal parent would. Also if her elder sister was supported through a levels without having to work, the youngest should be offered the same.
The poor girl - what damage this is doing to her emotionally to have her father treat her so badly is awful enough, but for her to be treated so differently to her sister is disgusting.

anna_1977

Brighton_belle wrote: »

That has no bearing on her father suddenly refusing to help feed or clothe her like an decent normal parent would. Also if her elder sister was supported through a levels without having to work, the youngest should be offered the same.
The poor girl - what damage this is doing to her emotionally to have her father treat her so badly is awful enough, but for her to be treated so differently to her sister is disgusting.

Thank you, this is the issue. She's been in tears today so upset that her dad has supported and is still supporting her older sister but not her. It's so unfair.

She does have a job but she made a decision last year to have teeth braces and it wasn't on the nhs- she's in the process of paying off £2500 as I said I wasn't paying for her. The rest of her wages go on petrol

Guest101

anna_m wrote: »

Thank you, this is the issue. She's been in tears today so upset that her dad has supported and is still supporting her older sister but not her. It's so unfair.

She does have a job but she made a decision last year to have teeth braces and it wasn't on the nhs- she's in the process of paying off £2500 as I said I wasn't paying for her. The rest of her wages go on petrol

This has no bearing on your original question, so apologies for going off topic:

£2,500?!?! Whoa!! That's crazy money!

Does, or did, she have a good relationship with her dad?

It's odd that he would do this out of the blue. Especially as he's still paying for DD1

anna_1977

Yes it is crazy which is why I said she would have to pay for them herself

They didn't have a good relationship when he first left but I thought they did now. He just says as she's an adult he can arrange money with them. For DD1 that's fine, he gives what's agreed, she's away from home. His real issue seems to be putting the money in my account. Which, if he gave her the £240 wouldn't be an issue but he's not willing to do that.

She asked me today if it would be easier and less stressful for me if she lived with him! I was very upset by that and said of course not & pointed out he doesn't have a spare room. Her response was 'when he buys another house' I suspect that might have something to do with this.

To be honest I have no idea what goes on in his head

Guest101

anna_m wrote: »

Yes it is crazy which is why I said she would have to pay for them herself

They didn't have a good relationship when he first left but I thought they did now. He just says as she's an adult he can arrange money with them. For DD1 that's fine, he gives what's agreed, she's away from home. His real issue seems to be putting the money in my account. Which, if he gave her the £240 wouldn't be an issue but he's not willing to do that.

She asked me today if it would be easier and less stressful for me if she lived with him! I was very upset by that and said of course not & pointed out he doesn't have a spare room. Her response was 'when he buys another house' I suspect that might have something to do with this.

To be honest I have no idea what goes on in his head

Do you think she might want to try living with him? Not necessarily a bad thing (though not from your perspective, which i can understand) - she may be unwilling to come out and say it as it would hurt your feelings.

I understand the difficulty, but if you showed you were upset, she may clam up. But it could be that she feels denied the opportunity to have a good father / daughter relationship?

I dont know your situatin, so could be very wrong, but perhaps it's worth having a chat to her without outsside influence?

anna_1977

I don't think she would want to really and he doesn't have the room for her at the moment.

FBaby

So what you need to ask him is why he is happy to pay dd1 the full amount but not dd2 whilst reminding him that he still has a legal duty towards her until she goes to Uni.