Ex Partner Trying To Ruin Me....

Puddylove

AliceBanned wrote: »

She can't kick him out of the house. If he was unfaithful it may be a different matter. It sounds like he has let her walk all over him enough. He needs to see a divorce lawyer. He also needs to stand up to her. It always the woman who keeps the house and kids. Especially if he did nothing wrong.

Well, it's 'always the woman who keeps the house' mainly because she's the one left with the children - and the children need a home.

I get a bit tired of hearing men whining about their partner staying in the marital home, and the fact they have to pay child maintenance.

I don't hear quite so many saying 'I'll take the kids full time; so you can get a job'...

P x

AliceBanned

True. To be honest his argument was that she was the only one who wanted to leave the marriage. But that doesn't make her at fault - on the contrary possibly. I've only heard his side as I've never met her, so maybe that made me a bit unintentionally biased.


Anyway, just wanted to make the point that maybe this man the OP is in a relationship with needs to get something.. if he has nowhere to live etc and hasn't done anything wrong?

gfplux

I think you should let a little time pass.
You have had to cope with huge changes in your life in the last few months.
1) you have found a new partner, who has just left their long term partner.
2) you are now living together
3) you have found that your new partners life is emotionally and financially VERY complicated.
This must be very difficult to cope with and you should not take any hasty action.

pennystretcher

HereBeDragons wrote: »

- - -
I delivered an ultimatum for my partner to attend Gamblers Anonymous. He did for a bit, then the excuses started again. I ended it. He's been gone 9 months now. The other day I opened a letter which arrived for him. It was from HSBC, recalling his £2k overdraft (which he always maxed out) because he'd stopped using the account and not repaid the money, and not responded to their previous correspondence. Another default, then. Yet I keep getting texts saying he's sorted himself out financially and asking me to meet up with him.

I'm so glad I'm out of the relationship, and that I kept our finances completely separate and never gave in to the temptation to lend him money. - - -

Ditto - I was dating someone I really, really liked and was hoping it would develop into something serious. Then I found out that he had a gambling problem and I ended the relationship. I hear he has now stopped gambling and arranged a way to pay his debt, but even then I would not think about going back there - the doubt would always be there at the back of my mind and I don't think it's worth it although I still like him.

pennystretcher

going back to the main topic - joint account - no way out of liability as far as I'm aware. If there are other loans she has taken out in his name, get him to go to the police. No point dancing around this matter even if her family tries to convince him not to do it.

And please, please, please do not even consider taking out loans etc to pay for his debts at this point of your relationship.