I just want to live

Swampy3k

Mary don't beat yourself up about it, as you can tell from my signature I am in quite a very similar situation not too far from yourself!.

There is many options available to you, for example, why not try YNAB? this helps you see where every penny goes and could help you sort out your finances in the long run, plus you can give every penny a job.

I get paid monthly, and making the minimum payments to debt leaves me with around £120 for the month ahead, yes this looks depressive when I'm taking home £1500+ a month. But at the same time I've got a roof over my head, bills are paid, car is good to go, as is the motorbike (my one guilty pleasure) and the cupboards are fully stocked. You'd be surprised what you can do with £120 believe me, started cycling to work to save even the buttons it costs to run my motorbike into Glasgow, now i'm doing things I never really done before such as on Sunday comng I'm cycling 50 miles from Glasgow-Edinburgh for a charity thing. Karma

Don't give up, concentrate on turning SadMary into Happy Mary. the rest will follow, and don't be afraid to treat yourself now and again! I'm sure you work hard, all work and no play does make for a monotonous life.

andyfromotley

sourcrates wrote: »

Hi,


Have to disagree with the above poster.

35k of debt, at your age, with no assets, I would not waste another moment thinking about it, I would declare myself Bankrupt, and have done with it, you may have to pay for a few years, but you could be discharged within a year, I would certainly look into this further, all other options would mean you would probably struggle for money for years to come, my opinion, having been there myself, would be to go Bankrupt, but get some good advice first, National Debtline best place for this.

Hi sourcrates,

i'm not sure technically that you can disagree with me as i didn't make a suggestion as to what the OP should do.:D Option 1 was seek debt relief advice.

But on your point, the op isn't insolvent. She can meet her obligations and pay off her debt if her situation remains the same. She can't have the lifestyle that she wants now because she is paying for the lifestyle that she had but couldn't afford. I'm not against debt relief in appropriate circumstances, but in the case where 'i could pay all of this off but can't be bothered as its a drag' isn't one of them to my mind. (i know that is somewhat misquoting the op) A DMP with all interest frozen would see of this debt in around 3 years? I'm not sure thats ridiculous

sourcrates

I see your point Andy, I think it's admirable that people choose debt management instead of insolvency, but my view is kind of clouded, as I spent 6 years in an IVA, and after it was all over, wished I'd gone Bankrupt instead.

The restrictions lasted too long for me, also, the failure of my marriage was an indirect concequence as well as other stuff.
Just think it could of been over quicker the Bankrupcy route.

Jon_B_2

I rarely think bankruptcy is the right option, but that SOA is horrific. There is no solvency in that at all.

Movingon5464

Your current soa is based on a job you believe has a real possibility of being made redundant and living cheaply with a friend. If i was you i would do a theoretical soa. For example consider if you was made redundant - how much could you realistically earn if you had to find another job. If you had to rent a flat alone how much would that cost. Then work out how much you would have left to pay debts after other realistic living expenses. Then work out how long it would take you to pay off your debts with interest frozen in a dmp. I believe you should compare that situation to bankruptcy. You owe a lot of money and if your circumstances do change it could take you a long time to pay off. I personally chose to pay my debts in a dmp as i felt it was the right thing to do but financially bankruptcy would have made more sense and part of me wishes i had taken the bankruptcy route as i would be free now.

lazer-zxr

Hi Mary,
Have you looked at how a snowball affect will pay off your debts? Once you get one cleared, using the money from that debt repayment to accelerate the next. It may seem that you can over pay very little at the moment, but overtime, your power to do this will increase greatly.

You are showing that you can afford your debts, and, like others have mentioned, a DMP will be the best option as you are solvent.

Regarding entitlement, I'm not really sure you've had your true LBM (light bulb moment) as you still believe you're entitled to luxuries.
I was in the same situation. As I was accumulating debt, I believed I was entitled to things because I worked hard. But it's a false belief. You are only entitled to luxuries if you can afford them. Money, I now perceive, is a measure of your entitlement to purchase luxuries.

Take my car for example. My salary is £50k+ (supporting family of 4). I used to believe I was entitled to a nice car because of my status, and hard work. I see my fellow commuters in BMWs, Mercedes, Audis, and some of these people I know personally, and are on much lower salaries than myself. However, I came to realise, that because I had £49k worth of debt, I am not entitled to that. I am now driving an £800 Citroen (which I am saving to replace) (when I'm not pedalling to work) because until I am out of debt, I can't afford a better car. Though my old self, would have said I was entitled to it. And if it's any consolation, I'm now on free haircuts.

So please think about this. Plan to snowball your debts and see what can be achieved. And realign your entitlement expectations to your true affordability.

Also look at some other ways to boost your income, some of the one off current account switches with bonuses have helped me out with a few hundred pounds.

This is intended to help, I hope it comes across that way.

SadMary27

andyfromotley wrote: »

Hi Mary,

welcome to the forum.

two things, You are relating your happiness to the amount of money you have spend. You need to try and break that link in your head. There are tons of things you can do for free that will make you happy. Try checking out meetup and similar, there is bound to be something on their that interests you. Night school, volunteering, allotment, etc etc etc. You can have a rich, happy and fulfilling life regardless of income.

You are in a big hole financially, no doubt. You didn't get there overnight and you won't get out of it overnight either. As i see it you have two choices.
1. Debt relief of some sort. Chat this through with National Debtline, Stepchange or CAP all of whom are totally free and get rave reviews on here. Think through the consequences of this, (there are consequences) they will be able to advise you.
2. Attack this debt like it is the worst thing you have ever seen. Your weapon to fight this is income! By my reckoning you are on about £27k but have to work most/some weekends. You need to increase your salary. Ask for a rise, change jobs, seek promotion, look for a job that is 9-5 and then take on weekend and evening work. Income is king for you in destroying this debt. Every extra pound you earn goes towards your debt and you soon start to shift it.

Either way you are in for a long slog and sadly there are no quick fixes, but you can live a happy life while you do either of these things. Always remember this will pass and you will one day be debt free, even if it doesn't feel like it right now. chin up mrs.

Hi,


I am sorry it seems that I am associating money with happiness as this isn't the case.

I have hit a low because since I graduated 2 years ago, the first year I made minimum payments everywhere, but this past year I have really put all money towards debt and the decrease has been very minimal. One card I have made for example £100 payment per month since January. 8 months, and that has only paid off £200 because I am seeing nearly £80 interest. I am going nowhere.


And whilst cutting down a haircut for example from 1 to 2-3 months, along with cutting back on some others, these aren't going to be any more than £30-40 extra towards debts a month, which means I still am not going to be going anywhere fast.

SadMary27

sourcrates wrote: »

Hi,


Have to disagree with the above poster.

35k of debt, at your age, with no assets, I would not waste another moment thinking about it, I would declare myself Bankrupt, and have done with it, you may have to pay for a few years, but you could be discharged within a year, I would certainly look into this further, all other options would mean you would probably struggle for money for years to come, my opinion, having been there myself, would be to go Bankrupt, but get some good advice first, National Debtline best place for this.

I have heard a few people say on here they wish they had just gone with the bankruptcy right from the start.


I plan on contacting a charity this weekend, just wanted to hear some thoughts here.

SadMary27

Davie-G wrote: »

Mary don't beat yourself up about it, as you can tell from my signature I am in quite a very similar situation not too far from yourself!.

There is many options available to you, for example, why not try YNAB? this helps you see where every penny goes and could help you sort out your finances in the long run, plus you can give every penny a job.

I get paid monthly, and making the minimum payments to debt leaves me with around £120 for the month ahead, yes this looks depressive when I'm taking home £1500+ a month. But at the same time I've got a roof over my head, bills are paid, car is good to go, as is the motorbike (my one guilty pleasure) and the cupboards are fully stocked. You'd be surprised what you can do with £120 believe me, started cycling to work to save even the buttons it costs to run my motorbike into Glasgow, now i'm doing things I never really done before such as on Sunday comng I'm cycling 50 miles from Glasgow-Edinburgh for a charity thing. Karma

Don't give up, concentrate on turning SadMary into Happy Mary. the rest will follow, and don't be afraid to treat yourself now and again! I'm sure you work hard, all work and no play does make for a monotonous life.

Thanks Davie,


I actually cycle 5 miles to and from work each day. I felt buying a bike at the beginning of the year was a smarter move. I got a bike for the cost of 1 months travel, so I could pay more money to my debt.


It is one of the small delights I have in life just now. I enjoy getting out into the open roads and just forgetting everything

SadMary27

Jon_B wrote: »

I rarely think bankruptcy is the right option, but that SOA is horrific. There is no solvency in that at all.

What would your thoughts be to tackle this Jon?