Is frugal the new normal?

culpepper

We are trend setters all.
Not so long ago we had need to help out with some clearing out of a family house ready for it to sell. I turned up in my old hoody and jeans, trainers and t shirt, almost all from a charity shop and already well used by me and OH's trendy,well off sister had on almost the exact same thing (obviously brand new) .
One of our nieces has distressed jeans complete with holes which are not that different to OH's own, real life worn out jeans.

Pooky

I grew up in the early 70's and money was scarce - all of our furniture was 2nd hand and the majority of it was only still holding together with the amount of layers of paint on it. If it looked shabby it was because it was - not because someone had attacked a newly painted surface with a bit of sandpaper and a rasp.

I'm all for anything that brings people back to crafting, gardening and learning how to do stuff for themselves but that doesn't need to involve "named" paint at £45 a tin, a range of cookware/fabrics by this years "in" designer or buying into expensive trends.

I've upcycled my fair share of furniture, all 2nd/3rd/4th hand and all with paint I've had or got very cheaply. One lady that visited my house recently who is well known in the area for her "shabby chic" projects, was pouring praise on one of my projects, telling me how well I'd done it and then asked which shade of "named" paint I'd used as she wanted one just like it....I replied it was a £1.99 bargain tin of satin wood paint from a DIY warehouse and she couldn't believe that it gave such a good finish.....she said unfortunately she couldn't use anything other than named paint on her stuff as people wouldn't buy it.

Goldiegirl

Is frugal the new normal?


To be honest, no I don't think it is


Although, if you spend time on certain areas of the board you'd think it was.


But most of the population are just getting on with their lives, spending money at the supermarket without thinking too much about it, buying new clothes and cars and going on holiday. And so what? It's their lives, to live as they please.


If a person is on a very low income, I can totally understand the need to be frugal all the time.


But, if you choose to be frugal, then that is your choice. On these boards I've noticed a tendency towards being judgemental or disapproving regarding people who choose not to be frugal all the time.


Maybe people choose not to shop and Aldi or Lidl, and don't bother with Yellow Sticker items, or go out for a few coffees and buy some clothes new rather than second hand, and get a new phone from time to time. It's their choice and they have their reasons for doing it. But there's no need to frown on them.


I spend time on the Pensions board, which has some very wealthy posters. They have money which most of us could only dream about. So it'd be crazy for them to worry too much about shaving a few pennies off their shopping bill. But, in their own ways, they are as MSE as the people on this board. They look for ways to make the most of their money by investing for the future.


When I'm on that board I feel financially poor by comparison even though they aren't judgemental about people who have less.


Yet on this board I feel profligate, and also slightly judged. If I reveal that I spend £250 per month at the Supermarket for 2 people, I know there'll be people who would like to comment on this and say that it is 'too much'. Yet it's right for me. That is the key thing - to live your life as you want, and not pay attention to what everybody else thinks you show do.


If you want to be frugal that's fine - if you want to spend a lot, that's also fine (as long as it doesn't put you into debt)


The majority of the population are like me - somewhere in between

fuddle

I just think it's interesting watching trends and attitudes change as society dictates. When you've had judgemental comments about having not a lot, making do and mending etc to suddenly be accepted by the very same same people who have inflicted hurt, and 'want to be seen to be in your gang', it can't go without question really. Why? What's in it for them? That's all we're doing really. We're discussing a change in attitudes in society on the whole, but scratch underneath and you'll find that frugal people have most probably had to endure hurtful comments about this life. Live and let live, absolutely. We have been trying to live without wondrous ridicule for quite sometime.

Those that have to watch their budgets do so because they would go under without a keen eye, knowledgeable attitudes etc. In that respect I don't think it's judgemental towards those who don't have to do that. I just think it's disbelief that they would choose to be so frivolous.

[Deleted User]

I think that the most lucky of us have been the ones born into families that had to be frugal, so we learnt to be frugal from being tiny. It was just a way of life and we were happy in our simplicity. Personally, this frugality was not called being frugal but it was a way of surviving in the 70s and 80s when mortgage rates hit 15%, salary was instantly cut by 1/2 for dh but he had to work even harder and longer. It was care and companionship, either everyone took the cut or people were laid off

Frugality spread to being financially aware, ie aware that a little money had to be spread around, so cash into envelopes every month and a very strict notebook of every penny spent. At the end of every month, if there was a little cash left, we had a bottle of pop and some crisps for the family. It was ok though, very satisfying in many ways

Eventually we were able to save a bit and then more when I went back to work. Frugality didn`t stop there, any spare money we had went towards pensions. In our lifetime we had one exotic holiday, maybe 5 in france or germany and lots of camping. Maybe that was the secret of why we are still a close family, we pulled together

Now, on my own, I can wallow if I want, I can buy what I want when I want, I can holiday where I like but frugal ways are part of me and tbh I don`t need anything more than to get the house ready for my old age. I don`t much care for holidays, why would I when I live in a rural village in a beautiful county. I meet nice people, I have very satisfying hobbies, I don`t care what I wear, I haven`t had a designer label in my life and I really am old enough now to say what I like and to not care what people think of my simple lifestyle

What bandwagon? It is all in the mind

Caterina

Thank you all for your interesting and thought provoking posts!

Hello, Icey! Long time no see, can't believe that your baby is ready for nursery! Catch up soon, I hope! xx

I would like to add that I am certainly not judging people who choose to spend more than me, I am practically surrounded by them, living in a middle class area and associating with mostly middle class people.

My gripe is that the poorer among us are becoming even poorer, partly because this trend towards "frugal chic" is taking the cost of frugal living, as it used to be, higher and it is viewed as a fashion, rather than a true necessity.

My other gripe is about people claiming to be skint and then splurging in stoooopid expenses (eg if you are truly skint AND have an over 60s travel pass, you just don't drive everywhere, or buy DOG PSYCHOLOGY books on Amazon for your dog - true story). I have nothing against people who earn their money, say "this is my money and I do what I want with it" and enjoy the fruit of their labour how they see fit.

But don't come to me bemoaning how poor you are, while you are dressed top to toe in designer clothes - even if you bought it in the sales! It's the people who MOAN about money and then really have no intention of looking at how to manage it better, they go right up my nose.

I have heard before that some people have felt judged in the OS thread and I am puzzled by that, and sorry, because in my experience I have only found friendly, kind and helpful people. I am openly middle class, reasonably well off (finally, thanks goodness!) and nobody has ever made me feel bad about it on this thread. My family and I just choose to spend wisely and this is partly the reason why we no longer have a mortgage and no debts. But I have never felt out of place here!

fuddle

A true frugal person worries about the price of food and how to pay their bills in order to keep the roof over their heads and the wolf from the door. I don't see how people buying into the apparent lifestyle is upping the prices for me at all because I don't buy into it.

Any basics that need replacing are replaced in places that aren't fashionably shabby chic or vintage. I'm well out of that game.

missyrichards

We started being frugal when I lost my job but the habits have stuck years later.:)

I definitely think being frugal and being more conscious about spending has become fashionable in UK society. I think it is a very positive trend.

Goldiegirl

fuddle wrote: »

Those that have to watch their budgets do so because they would go under without a keen eye, knowledgeable attitudes etc. In that respect I don't think it's judgemental towards those who don't have to do that. I just think it's disbelief that they would choose to be so frivolous.

If a person is very wealthy, I don't think it is frivolous of them not to micro-manage every single penny that passes out of their bank accounts.


They know they can afford what they want to buy - so there's no need for them to look that closely.


But they haven't got wealthy by accident. They've had to work very hard, and be very shrewd with how they invest their money.


They are being MSE, it's just different to what is termed as MSE on the OS board

fuddle

Oh I do get that. I like nothing more than to see people of status and wealth watching what they do with their money.

What I was referring to was the idea that people of frugal ways judge people who don't have to watch their ways of spending. To pat ourselves on the back for reducing our grocery spends or coming across as a bit high and mighty because we have excelled at something that has made our life a little better for not very much money appears to come across as us being whollier than thou and judgemental.

Not at all. It is difficult having to watch the pennies. The feelings that I get in making do and mending etc blow the feelings I get from consuming, having and getting, right out of the water... and I have been on the other side of it.

Self appreciation here is high because no one else understands, no else gets it. I think we're a group of people who get along because we have a liking to OS values and so much of that is about making do/mending, appreciating what we have etc.

I said earlier that I felt frugal was different to thrifty and that being frugal, I felt, had negative connotations. I am frugal, my sister is appearing to be thrifty. I feel it's appearing to be thrifty that is fashionable. I believe the MSE way is fashionable and ever so great because it brings out the savvy consumer.

I believe they are two separate things. I don't judge the thrifty amongst us at all but I feel the thrifty, or appearing to be thrifty, judge us frugal folk and just don't understand that we can have good feelings from the things we do to get through life. Achieving with very little isn't rubbing people's noses in it that spend more. It's just that it's a good feeling to succeed in circumstances that don't allow for a lot of extra income.