Considering DMP - SOA advice please

AliceBanned

Verbatim wrote: »

It sounds great to be headhunted! Allow yourself to believe in yourself. Demonstrate self confidence. Practise self belief and you'll convince yourself and others.
And if you get the £50k job this time it could well be the £70k one the next job after that.
Boo to the co-op card. At least it's another whack off it.
V

Thanks Verbatim. I felt better for a while but I don't really have much self-confidence.


I think I get drained from all the struggling and have a habit of thinking negatively a lot of the time. Sometimes just being around naysayers at work has a bad impact but it is really fortunate that this nice lady contacted me and gave me advice and inside information about a great organisation.


I realise she is just trying to fill posts will the right people and accidentally I gave her my manager's name (not for that but she asked in the context of my jobhunt - only afterwards did I realise she was fishing for inside information as she knows my organisation is so similar in many of its goals and topics as the one I am applying to and she is recruiting to in the 70k role.) I would be so annoyed if my manager got the 70k role but I doubt he could get his shady behaviour past their watchful eyes even in an interview. He has the required experience though and I naively told her I thought that when she had sent me the job - ie it is the next level up. Depressingly if he did leave I would not apply for or want his job as I can't stand the person he reports to, and he can't stand me.


But true onwards and upwards, I need to move away from this negative situation and some of my negative attitudes.

AliceBanned

I'll add a note to my credit files re the credit card. I agree it is very bad, as far from missing a payment, I had overpaid and earlier than required. So bad.

AliceBanned

Actually I'm going to write and complain to Co-op and try to get it removed.


I paid on the day of the statement being issued! They have a problem with that! They are just being bureaucratic and unfair and it will damage my chances of getting better deals when I am in financial difficulty and doing my best to get out of it.


Really out of order and heavy handed of them.

Verbatim

Go Alice! That's the spirit.

AliceBanned

I have spoken to a helpful lady at the Co-op who is trying to get it removed but can't guarantee it.


I get very irritable - I think it is the long term stress of this so I have started a low dose of antidepressant to try and stop me being so affected by everything. I feel a bit numb but I will give it a go for a few months as I really feel I am not able to pick up my moods and I am extremely anxious and having panic attacks, especially on the tube.


When I saw the doc she said it was anxiety and there is also workplace stress. At least with the meds I feel a bit protected from all the sh£t that gets thrown at me sometimes (or I think it does, who knows whether that's accurate as I'm depressed so I can't tell).


I have now set up a DD to pay the min on my Coop card monthly, and DDs on the two Cap one cards as I am snowballing them (£170 per month between them). My problem is using cards still so effectively not paying them off. Credit cards are a big problem for me in this respect, so I have applied for a loan from a credit union of £5000 - advertised interest rates 6% but I doubt I would get this. If it is much higher I won't go ahead. I may not be offered the loan but if I am I will repay the Halifax and FD credit card - consolidate rather. I have closed the Halifax and cut up the Cap one cards.The scarey thing about cutting up more cards is when something unexpected comes up, or when I don't have money left to get to work. I am sure I will get beyond this stage but I am not there yet.

catriona79

Hello Alice, this is only brief but wanted to say well done for going to see a Dr about how you feel. Those things are the to help you, and I hope you get better. I've been though it, and it doesn't last forever, but use any help you can get, incl meds.
Big hug x

AliceBanned

Thanks Catriona that's very kind. I agree I need help and support. I think the meds are helping a bit - I am definitely determined to make changes and stop putting up with things. It will still be a slog but I have to aim towards being happier.

Verbatim

I love your grit and determination Alice. Keep going.

AliceBanned

. Thanks Verbatim. Your comment has helped a lot - I don't see myself that way but I am quite hard on myself - I need to tell myself that I am strong and can achieve things!

Verbatim

Absolutely. If you act as you want to be it becomes a habit.