On a DMP but ex-husband gets off scot free!

eira

I do feel for you-this was/is my situation. I have no time for solicitors at all-they cheerfully left me with the debts. But please please please make sure re the financial situation before the divorce goes through-you can stop it until the finances are sorted. DO NOT BE BULLIED. Once the divorce goes through you have no bargaining position at all. The debts should be taken into account in a settlement-my solicitor just didn't bother -it was 'only £30000 I would 'just have to manage'.
Ask around for a good solicitor and book a free initial half hour. Although I'm cynical to a fault about the legal profession my ex's solicitor and barrister did a superb job-and that is a truly honest comment.
Creditors don't care about the origins of the debts or your ability to pay.If you're the one paying that's who they'll go after. I also have a theory that if they smell vulnerability lone female/single parent etc they're even worse. From the ex's point of view it's a dream come true-you walk out on the debt and leave someone else to clear up the mess.

Don't feel bad-as you've read on the boards there are others who've been down the same road. Do your best now to minimise the damage to your debt free future

Thinking of you

LOOK AFTER YOUR OWN INTERESTS


Good Luck

izzybusy23

eira wrote: »

I do feel for you-this was/is my situation. I have no time for solicitors at all-they cheerfully left me with the debts. But please please please make sure re the financial situation before the divorce goes through-you can stop it until the finances are sorted. DO NOT BE BULLIED. Once the divorce goes through you have no bargaining position at all. The debts should be taken into account in a settlement-my solicitor just didn't bother -it was 'only £30000 I would 'just have to manage'.
Ask around for a good solicitor and book a free initial half hour. Although I'm cynical to a fault about the legal profession my ex's solicitor and barrister did a superb job-and that is a truly honest comment.
Creditors don't care about the origins of the debts or your ability to pay.If you're the one paying that's who they'll go after. I also have a theory that if they smell vulnerability lone female/single parent etc they're even worse. From the ex's point of view it's a dream come true-you walk out on the debt and leave someone else to clear up the mess.

Don't feel bad-as you've read on the boards there are others who've been down the same road. Do your best now to minimise the damage to your debt free future

Thinking of you

LOOK AFTER YOUR OWN INTERESTS


Good Luck

I definately second this advice.. sorry for multiple postings but I really feel for you here and would hate to see anybody get saddled with this amount of debt because of an unscrupulous partner... halt that divorce ASAP because once decree absolute has been issued you have no bargaining power as stated above.

Edited to say, see a woman solicitor.. they will understand where you are coming from and persue your interests better as they have more empathy than men...

nickelodeon

Just wanted to clarify a couple of things, although you will legally be responsible for any debts in your sole name, under the divorce all assets and liabilities will be taken into account when working out a financial settlement. Therefore just because the credit cards are in your sole name that does not stop you asking your ex to contribute towards them as part of the divorce settlement, especially if he was the one that ran up the debts!

Secondly once Decree Absolute has been pronounced most of your finanical claims against your ex are still open so this will not stop you from dealing with the finances.

Go see a solicitor as soon as possible, hopefully you will be eligible for Legal Aid and they will be able to give you some proper advice about what you are entitled to and what chance you have of getting anything off your ex!

fiveyearplan

You need to check whether he is responsible for paying maintenance for your daughter. Friend of mine split with her partner and she was told had she been married he would have been responsible for the 2 kids she had with her ex husband. Anyway its worth looking into and looking into ASAP.

ohcrap

Hello there,

I was hoping somebody might be able to offer me some advise?

I am divorcing my husband and since the separation he has cashed in assets in excess of 70K ... saying he had to pay off family debts (which did not exist)!!!

He has since our separation accumulated a number of debts, god how since he had not been paying the mortgage and during our marriage we had no debts apart from the mortgage.

He has now quit his job paying 45K per year and is filing for bankcruptsy!!!

He is making sure that my child and myself will see nothing and will not have a roof over our heads.

Is there anything I can do to protect myself and my child from his actions.

I would really appreciate anyones advise.

Thank you

Ohcrap!

Waspeze

Is the mortgage in joint names? any jointly owned debts pass to you so if it is joint it might be worth talking to your mortgage company and explaining the situation, they might help with a mortgage holiday or something... no idea if this'd work, hopefully someone else will post something more helpful

RAS

Hi

Do you have any paperwork that shows your finances prior to the breakdown of your marriage? If not can you get it FAST.

How many of the these accounts are joint? Write and if necessary hand-deliver letters to them all advising them that any further withdrawals require both signatures.

Unfortunately, some exs are vicious. I know one instance when the ex deliberately ran down the family firm which they had built jointly, went into adminstration and stopped working. Eventually, very eventually the other spouse was able to prove that the ex had taken hundreds of thousands of pounds out of the company and stashed it in accounts, some overseas.

ohcrap

The mortgage is in both of our names. I have already approached the mortgage company and they said that we cannot take a mortgage holiday because my ex has allowed it to become in arrears.

He was ordered in court to pay the mortgage & arrears but he just ignored it and has since quit his job & filing for bankcruptsy.

We had a couple of joint accounts but the debt on those is minimal and I have paperwork regarding this.

I have plenty of paperwork, luckily.

Is there anything I can do to nul his bankcruptsy as i know he has stashed a large sum of money away.

He has even been spotted looking at property & purchasing curtains & household goods with his girlfriend ...so he cannot be that poor!

I am worried that my child and I will be on the streets once the debt collectors come knocking on the door.

Thanks for your comments/tips I appreciate it!! X

RAS

I am not sure. Given you finances, have you thought of contacting CLA, see here http://www.communitylegaladvice.org.uk/

They will only help in low income situations.

With respect to the joint accounts, write to both and advise them that you have split up and that any further withdrawals must have BOTH signatures.

Do you know what assets he liquidated?

ohcrap

Hello again!

Yes he has cashed in a number of assets including an endowment policy, premiun bonds and money stashed abroad.

I will contact the banks asap... thanks for the tip. I will also check out that site.

Thanks X