On a DMP but ex-husband gets off scot free!

Shineyhappy

I really would go and see a solicitor asap and see if you can take him to court for non payments of these debts or do something as this really is unfair. Many

RAS

Hi

Saving a few quid on a solicitor is going to cost you £40,000.

Also if you have a child, you really do need legal advice re maintenance, housing and pensions rights.

Please halt this process until you have proper legal advice.

If you cannot get out of the situation and are not buying a house, you should take advice from CCCS or national debtline re BK. That would force the creditors to chase your ex.

peb

As DR Hook says if the debts are joint and several then the creditor will not care who pays them. As you are doing a DIY divorce you may not have considered the ancillary relief situation - usually addressed between nisi and absolute. At least see if you can get a 30 min free appointent to discuss ancillary relief - it may be that under an order (preferably a consent order but your ex may object!) that your ex pays all costs.

pandakl

I can't thank you all enough for the advice. I should explain the situation in a little more depth.

There are no children involved with my ex-husband (thankfully) but I have a daughter from a previous marriage. I *think* I got ancillary relief as I didn't have to pay the court fees for the divorce - is that the same thing? Not sure.

My house is rented from the council. I get no Housing Benefit as I earn too much money (yeah right - £800 a month) but I get my 25% CT discount. I get no maintenance as there is a joint parental responsibility and shared care although in reality,my daughter is here 90% of the week, but I would rather have that than maintenance.

I hastily divorced my ex as I eventually came to my senses and realised that, apart from the cheating he did, the bills were racking up. I wrongly assumed that the banks would also go after him as they were in joint names. Big mistake. He is now back with his ex (who, incidentally, claims as a single parent) and probably laughing his socks off at the fact that he is not being chased for the debt. He does not know I have a DMP, he knows nothing of my financial situation but it doesn't take a genius to work it out!

Ideally, what I want to do is for the banks to pursue him...that's not going to happen so I guess that leaves me with either paying it and learning a very hard lesson or going after him myself...legal aid? Not sure.

I guess It's solicitor time? Eeeeek!

Panda

izzybusy23

pandakl wrote: »

Thanks Rog. I find the whole situation amazing because these creditors have the opportunity there to get their money repaid quicker if they chase him, yet they are totally disinterested!

Unfortunately, even though the whole 40K is HIS debt, I was stupid enough to let him run up half of that on my credit cards (I know..stupid) so I have to swallow that and I will, but I'm really not happy about him walking away and leaving me to clear up his mess. My credit rating now sucks and it had taken me months to stop the nasty phonecalls and letters. I shall have to contact CAB because I can't let him get away with this.

Panda

Hi there

Surely this joint debt should had been sorted out as part of divorce negotiations? If not then before its finalised I would see your solicitor and ask for half of this debt to be included in the divorce and until he agree's you will not let it go to decree absolute.

Terrible that your ex-DH is getting away with this. See your solicitor ASAP!!

Edited to say that I just read that you done the divorce yourself. Eeeek.. get your backside to a solictors for a free half an hour consultation and try to HALT this divorce and get a solicitor to do the rest... ok its going to cost you some money but nowhere near the £20k you can shave off the debt.

Good luck and let us know how you get on!!

Dr_Hook

Seeking professional legal advice is definitely the way forward. Regarding taking action against your ex, I doubt you'll have much recourse (unless you can still remedy this in the divorce). At the moment he owes the creditors (as do you); the most you'd be able to claim from him (AFAIK) would be a percentage (probably half) of whatever you have already paid to the creditors you jointly owe.

From what you've said of your situation, prima facie, the best course of action would be bankruptcy, but make sure you take advice from National Debtline/CCCS/PayPlan/CAB before proceeding down this route.

Bankruptcy would leave you debt free, shouldn't affect your tenancy (though you might want to check with the council to be on the safe side) and is unlikely to affect your job (though obviously check your employment contract - I'm making this assumption based solely on your salary level).

Once you're bankrupt creditors will have no choice but to pursue your ex if they want full repayment - that should wipe the smirk off his face!

RAS

Ancilliary relief is when the financial settlement associated with the divorce is sorted out.

The banks are not going to pursue him just because you want them to.

You say he does not know about your DMP? and that the bills were racking up?

Do you know what state his finances were in?

Maybe of the two of you, your record for trying to pay off debt is better than his? So they are going to go after you.

The problem I see is that if the debts are joint, the creditors are not going to just agreed to split it into two separate debts with sole liability as this means that they can only chase one of you instead of both of you.

How much is in joint names and how much was acquired jointly but in your name?

pandakl

You say he does not know about your DMP? and that the bills were racking up?

He doesn't know about the DMP because he refused to speak to me after I made it clear he wasn't coming back home. He knew the debts had racked up - he is fully aware of the debt financial situation but nothing abut the DMP - he probably doesn't even know what a DMP is anyway.

Do you know what state his finances were in?

Are in??? Well, I can only assume that he has wandered off with no debt to pay, seeing as I have it all on my shoulders. he is living with his ex who is claiming single parent benefit and he earns roughly (trying to remember now) £1800 a month.

Were in??? He was ok when he was here because muggins sorted out the repayments with my wages and we lived on his. Big mistake.

How much is in joint names and how much was acquired jointly but in your name?

Roughly 25K is in joint names which is the two big loans. The rest is in my name only on a few credit cards he racked up

My credit record was fine until he came along - ironically I worked at a major bank before I moved to my current job so I was careful not to run up major debt. He, however, has managed to wiggle out of paying off a loan before, or so he told me, but I don't know how.

Surely this joint debt should had been sorted out as part of divorce negotiations? If not then before its finalised I would see your solicitor and ask for half of this debt to be included in the divorce and until he agree's you will not let it go to decree absolute.

This would play into his hands in just one respect - he refused to sign the divorce papers initially as he would not accept that I wanted one. It wasn't until I emailed his girlfriend asking her if she knew why he wouldn't sign the divorce papers, that he immediately did. Heh heh - I knew THAT would work.

I know bankruptcy is a useful option but that makes my legs turn to jelly! I should go and read the boards more.

Jeez the more I explain the situation, the more stupid I feel - I can't believe I didn't see this coming a mile off and I'm kicking myself for not being cautious.

Panda

myrnahaz

Don't feel stupid - we all have to trust our partners and it's certainly not our fault if he/she is a complete twinkie. You don't need to re-read these posts, just make an appointment with a solicitor immediately. and stop worrying about bankruptcy - it may not come to that, but you won't know until you see a solicitor and see if you can save yourself some of that £40k.

izzybusy23

pandakl wrote: »

He doesn't know about the DMP because he refused to speak to me after I made it clear he wasn't coming back home. He knew the debts had racked up - he is fully aware of the debt financial situation but nothing abut the DMP - he probably doesn't even know what a DMP is anyway.



Are in??? Well, I can only assume that he has wandered off with no debt to pay, seeing as I have it all on my shoulders. he is living with his ex who is claiming single parent benefit and he earns roughly (trying to remember now) £1800 a month.

Were in??? He was ok when he was here because muggins sorted out the repayments with my wages and we lived on his. Big mistake.



Roughly 25K is in joint names which is the two big loans. The rest is in my name only on a few credit cards he racked up

My credit record was fine until he came along - ironically I worked at a major bank before I moved to my current job so I was careful not to run up major debt. He, however, has managed to wiggle out of paying off a loan before, or so he told me, but I don't know how.



This would play into his hands in just one respect - he refused to sign the divorce papers initially as he would not accept that I wanted one. It wasn't until I emailed his girlfriend asking her if she knew why he wouldn't sign the divorce papers, that he immediately did. Heh heh - I knew THAT would work.

I know bankruptcy is a useful option but that makes my legs turn to jelly! I should go and read the boards more.

Jeez the more I explain the situation, the more stupid I feel - I can't believe I didn't see this coming a mile off and I'm kicking myself for not being cautious.

Panda

Unfortunately it looks like you are saddled with the CC debt if just in your name but definately get to a solicitors to demand half of the £25k debt. He has as much liability to that as you do and I am sure a solicitor can sort this out as part of divorce settlements go. When I got divorced we had an £800 overdraft on a frozen account. My ex was being an idiot and refusing to sign to get the account closed. In the end he did and I repaid the overdraft but persued him for his half, £400 and that was settled via divorce. Not on the same level as you I know, but it was sorted...

Book yourself a half hour free consulatation ASAP to see where you go from here.. plus as you have a daughter and now a single parent surely you will be entitled to legal aid?

Good luck!!! Don't let that man make you a push over..