What's the cost of having children?

[Deleted User]

Loss of income was our biggest cost. Wife going part time meant a drop in household income of ~£20k. We were fortunate to have great in-laws who were childminders when we needed it. It cost us £80k to move to a bigger house when the second child came along - admittedly, it might have been possible to have 2 kids in a 2 bed terrace but we didn't want to experience it.

Nursery costs have been more on the second child since he's a September birthday, and you're effectively paying for a year extra of nursery. There goes £350 a month. I think i'd honestly cry if I sat down to figure out what they cost.. but they're good kids and worth it

ben_m_g

A lot.

As mentioned child care is the biggy.

A nursery will cost in the region of 9k, obviously if you or your OH stop working, that will have to be taken into account.

onlyroz

I have a six-year-old and a ten-year-old.

For each child we spent around £45k in nursery fees getting them to school age, so that's £90k. (£12k a year for three years, dropping to £9k for the final year taking into account the 15 free hours early years provision).

I currently spend about £3k a year in after school club and holiday club costs.

That's before factoring in the extra food, heating, electricity and clothing costs. We also upgraded the car and did a loft conversion to give us the extra required space.

MallyGirl

ringo_24601 wrote: »

Loss of income was our biggest cost. Wife going part time meant a drop in household income of ~£20k. We were fortunate to have great in-laws who were childminders when we needed it. It cost us £80k to move to a bigger house when the second child came along - admittedly, it might have been possible to have 2 kids in a 2 bed terrace but we didn't want to experience it.

Nursery costs have been more on the second child since he's a September birthday, and you're effectively paying for a year extra of nursery. There goes £350 a month. I think i'd honestly cry if I sat down to figure out what they cost.. but they're good kids and worth it

Loss of income was big for us and has continued to this day even though I am back in full time work and DD is 13! When I got pregnant I earned more than OH. I took a year off then went back 3 days per week. Got made redundant and had to take a lower grade job to achieve the 3 days a week but softened the blow by becoming a homeworker. Once DD reached yr 5 I was doing enough overtime to be 4 days a week but not getting the extra benefits so I swapped to 4 days a week and 2 years ago finally went full time. I now earn less than half what my OH does due to putting the breaks on my career. I wouldn't change the way I did things as it gave me time with DD, involvement with school, time to study a hobby in depth, etc but I didn't anticipate that it would affect salary for the rest of my life.

FreddieFrugal

MallyGirl wrote: »

I wouldn't change the way I did things

More to life than money, as you say.

Kaye1

There are lots of things which I didn't budget for.


Ballet lessons- not a necessity I know- however, my LO is very good at it and totally obsessed by it. It is brilliant exercise and is teaching her discipline and life skills. (You could substitute pretty much any sport instead of ballet)


She is totally dedicated to it- we support her in this, so it costs a fair amount. She understands that she can have the basics, not the frills. So we pay for the proper leotard/shoes etc- her cardi is knitted by Nanny. Hair bits bought by me from Poundland.


These are the things that catch you out.


Food- the eldest couldn't eat certain things (medical not fussy!) so food bill shot up.


Nappies. Oh my goodness.....


Car seat.


Shoes- as already mentioned. Can shop around but cheaper shoes sometimes fall apart....


Days out- we always look for low cost days but the bigger places cost a fortune. Eden Project for a family was over £70- luckily I had vouchers....! We took a picnic too.


Occasional treats- they add up. Mine don't have pocket money but they are allowed to choose a magazine once a month. Two magazines- £6 p/month x 12.


School dinners- our school is £11.50 p/week for cooked lunch. My oldest has them on her 'long' day, when she is out for longer than usual, rest of time is packed lunch. Depends if you want them to have a hot meal every day.


School trips, school uniform, school clubs, swimming at school...........

DinkyLass

Can I just say how great it is to see someone actually considering the cost of children instead of just blindly jumping into parenthood!


Me and my Husband are childfree, partly through circumstance and partly through choice. We were on the verge of going for fertility treatment when we forced ourselves to think about why we really wanted kids...and we struggled to come up with a good reason! Money was a factor in the decision making process, we're comfortable and we could probably afford to have a child, but ultimately it just boiled down to the fact that we didn't want it badly enough.
I guess if you get to a point where you both know you desperately want children then you'll make sacrifices and budget accordingly.


Good luck with the planning!

MallyGirl

Kaye1 wrote: »

There are lots of things which I didn't budget for.

Ballet lessons- not a necessity I know- however, my LO is very good at it and totally obsessed by it. It is brilliant exercise and is teaching her discipline and life skills. (You could substitute pretty much any sport instead of ballet)

substitute music lessons for us - again it was our choice but she really enjoys playing and isn't sporty so it is nice for her to get involved in non-academic things.

Kaye1 wrote: »

Shoes- as already mentioned. Can shop around but cheaper shoes sometimes fall apart....

my DD has very narrow feet so it had to be Clarks or Startrite - it is still Clarks now and she takes a 7!
At one stage she grew a half size every 5 or 6 weeks. New school shoes, trainers, plimsoles for school PE, ballet shoes, jazz shoes, wellies (after a full size jump), walking boots (we are keen walkers and her feet needed proper support as much as ours did) each time plus a smattering of sandals, flip flops, etc. I am glad this has slowed down now!!!

scarlet55

You can factor in a couple of thousand even before the child's born.
My daughter and her partner have spent a small fortune on kitting out the nursery, car seat, pram/buggy, nappies, first size clothes ect.

duchy

scarlet55 wrote: »

You can factor in a couple of thousand even before the child's born.
My daughter and her partner have spent a small fortune on kitting out the nursery, car seat, pram/buggy, nappies, first size clothes ect.

Ah but your daughter isn't a self styled "Moneysaving Ninja" like the OP

There is absolutely no need to do this -and a healthy secondhand market in baby goods .

Nothing wrong with spending a couple of £K if you want to and can afford it (and you'll be contributing to the health of the secondhand market when they are no longer needed) but it isn't a need it's a want.

It's a bit like weddings - some people spend tens of thousands others spend a couple of hundred- both are valid and legal choices and what is right for you may not be right for someone else but ultimately the retail industry will encourage you to spend as much as possible to "show your love" .