Got here by luck, intending to stay by judgement.

mark55man

No is a hard word, I think my focus is more on Less or perhaps (if you will indulge me with 2 words) That'll Do

Goldiegirl

mark88man wrote: »

I know some on here (and it is good advice) want you to strategically and immediately change your ways - but the emergent method of gradually tightening and tightening your spending and reducing your lifestyle commitments does work

I tend to think gradual change can work best as it is very difficult to make wholesale changes overnight, and maintain them. Making smaller changes over a period of a few months can pay dividends as it's much more sustainable.


However, I do feel that Mr B may have his fingers in his ears going 'la-la-la' when it comes to advice and general interaction with people who post suggestions on his diary.


I asked a direct question that only needed a yes or no answer yesterday morning, but Mr B didn't acknowledge me. I genuinely am interested, as I think Mr B has a great opportunity to make changes at this point in his life, but it is very difficult to remain interested when you feel that your suggestions are falling on deaf ears.


There's the old saying ' Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance'.


No one expects a plan to be in place over night, but I get the impression there's not even a plan to make a proper plan. Considering what has happened in the past, I have concerns that Mr B will slip back into his old ways without a structure to work within

mark55man

A bit of shameless self promotion here

As its fathers day and this thread got me really thinking - here's my diary

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5266436 entitled Got Myself Comfortable - Now Increasing the pace

Mainly focussing on cars at the moment - which I suspect may be Mr B's guilty secret - so feel free to post on there if you want to take the heat away from your diary

getmore4less

Gradual change works when the books balance in the first place

You have to do the initial cutback treatment to get them to balance.

But to do that you need to know what is going where to make the decision of what to cut.

MrBloater

Cleared a big mental hurdle today. The return to my old workplace went well. Left with a smile on my face and am looking forward to tomorrow. Means that rather than worrying about if the right decisions were made, I can spend more time focusing on the main task in hand (clearing this mortgage by July 2024) That'll take approximately £1100 of overpayments a month which is doable - and I also want to start not using the overdraft, and having a contigency fund. This could potentially remove the need for credit cards whatsoever. Once we have enough money for the emergency flights for Mrs B and the two littlies to a remote transatlantic destination (in case of a family emergency) then we are sorted.

So, having looked at the various inflows/outflows coming out, the priorities are
- Start living without the overdraft
- Build up a 6k contigency fund
- Renew any expiring insurance agreements with a one-off payment rather than spreading it over the months (just done this with the car tax)
- Get the kids involved - get them using a savings account and selling/donating/exchanging their unwanted stuff (thanks for whoever mentioned gumtree/carboots - with the possible exception of about 20 highish value items, most of the tat that is already marked for redistribution - ie cluttering up my shed in tubs, would get just as much money using non ebay means. The days of me having nerds fighting to pay top dollar for my uber-rare Bark Psychosis LP are long gone, the only vinyl left is the stuff nobody wants)

- Keep my eye on the prize - mortgage free in 9 years.

wantabetterlife

Well done Mr B...you are making some great changes :j

solentsusie

MrBloater wrote: »

The most important pledge I can do for myself is to stop thinking there are any schemes or plans in place to augment my income - it's reasonable, not as much as it used to be, but I have to budget within what we have coming into the house now - not looking for some pie-in-the-sky ideas that will likely end up backfiring. I just need to exude agreeability and stop checking how much greener the grass is elsewhere, as the main prize isn't career advancement, it's getting this paid down whilst maintaining myself as a decent father, husband and son.

Great to hear that you are looking at budgeting within your income and no longer looking for the 'next great scheme' to save you.

I know that it can be tough at first, and it can certainly be tough saying 'no' to the little Bloaters but you do need to live within your means so that you do not end up back in the same boat again but with additional debt on your mortgage. It sounds as though you are hopefully on the way to this and an attitude change is on the cards which is excellent news.

Yes, it does take time to break patterns of behaviour and bad habits, but if you persevere rather than taking the famine or feast route, then hopefully you will get there. Also, it feels really great to see money in the savings account rather than an excess charge on the credit card!

I wish you well with your journey.

gallygirl

solentsusie wrote: »

Great to hear that you are looking at budgeting within your income and no longer looking for the 'next great scheme' to save you.

I know that it can be tough at first, and it can certainly be tough saying 'no' to the little Bloaters but you do need to live within your means so that you do not end up back in the same boat again but with additional debt on your mortgage. It sounds as though you are hopefully on the way to this and an attitude change is on the cards which is excellent news.

Yes, it does take time to break patterns of behaviour and bad habits, but if you persevere rather than taking the famine or feast route, then hopefully you will get there. Also, it feels really great to see money in the savings account rather than an excess charge on the credit card!

I wish you well with your journey.

I agree with susie. Also what is really important is to set a good example to your children - knowing they can't 'have it all' is a very important lesson for them to learn!

How is the sun visor .

getmore4less

How do you plan to identify if you will need to use the OD?

I would forget the mortgage overpayment till you have the books balanced and saving a regular amount each month with the target to grow that amount up over time.

Once the emergency fund is sorted then use the savings to overpay.

You need a simple goal that is much closer than 2024, you will just find excuses to delay with 9 years.

You need something like have the £6k saved by Jan 1st and NO new debt.

If you manage that £1kpm then come Jan 2016 you can set your next target

getmore4less

All income from one offs like selling stuff needs to separate from saving from income plan.