How to choose the ideal 6th form for my son?

j.e.j.

marisco wrote: »

The OP is no such thing. A demanding, controlling parent wouldn't come on here asking for opinion and advice. They would just steam roll on without any thought or consideration and do what they felt appropriate. The OP even stated in the D of E thread that the last thing she wanted to do was to persuade her son to take part in something that he would hate!

I don't know about demanding and controlling.. probably just wanting to humblebrag about her kids achievements on facebook or in the yearly round robin

suziemoon

I've not read any earlier posts so other people may have said this to you but I'd start thinking about Year 10. My son is currently sitting his GCSEs and will be staying on at the school he is doing his GCSEs at because it NOW has a great Sixth Form with really good results last year, before that it had really poor results, they got rid of the Head Teacher and it's totally different now. So my advice is be aware of where you'd like your Son to go but don't make plans until nearer to the time.

jackyann

I can't comment on OP's exact motives, but I would say: just keep your eyes & ears open at the moment. As others have said, this is too early, a lot can change, both in terms of how good a college or school is, what subjects etc.etc.
But no harm in gathering information and sorting the wheat from the chaff - what is gossip, what is "puffed up", and especially, what is being said by kids who are most like your own?
And do listen to your son (even though most teens are not talkers!)

rdone

LET HIM CHOOSE!!!

You can go with him to see other places but it's his choice, if you choose for him he will probably end up disliking the place and blaming you.

It's his life at the end of the day and you're just there to guide and help him. Not to make his decisions.

SeduLOUs

Spinkz wrote: »

She literally followed him through schools, working at his primary and seconday school. She even forced him to take intense music and dance lessons and guess what? He is gay :rotfl:

I think you need to be careful with your posts. I know you probably didn't mean it how it read, but suggesting that controlling parents and forced dance lessons can 'turn' someone gay, and that this is somehow comical karma for the mother's behaviour is quite a derogatory thing to post.

System

SeduLOUs wrote: »

I think you need to be careful with your posts. I know you probably didn't mean it how it read, but suggesting that controlling parents and forced dance lessons can 'turn' someone gay, and that this is somehow comical karma is quite a derogatory thing to post.

It looks derogatory when you edit out the rest of it but as i'm speaking from a third person perspective it actually isn't. I appreciate your concern, just lay off the stitch up

SeduLOUs

Spinkz wrote: »

It looks derogatory when you edit out the rest of it but as i'm speaking from a third person perspective it actually isn't. I appreciate your concern, just lay off the stitch up

You're the one who said "guess what, he is gay :rotfl:" as if as a punishment for her behaviour she ended up with a gay son, which implies you think that's a bad thing...

Edit: I'm not gay, hyper sensitive or personally offended by your post. I was only pointing out how it came across to me.

SeduLOUs

I'm not arguing with you - please see my edit above.

I was only politely pointing out how it read to me, and that I could imagine others might find it offensive.

Your post read to me like it was a warning to the OP that carrying on with controlling behaviour might result in her getting a (funny) gay son too. Perhaps I'm the only one, or perhaps not and someone will come along later and be offended by your post.

Text never comes across the same as speech, so we all need to take care about how we say things. I've clearly annoyed you now which absolutely wasn't my intention at all, so I apologise for that.

rachy182

SeduLOUs wrote: »

I'm not arguing with you - please see my edit above.

I was only politely pointing out how it read to me, and that I could imagine others might find it offensive.

Your post read to me like it was a warning to the OP that carrying on with controlling behaviour might result in her getting a (funny) gay son too. Perhaps I'm the only one, or perhaps not and someone will come along later and be offended by your post.

Text never comes across the same as speech, so we all need to take care about how we say things. I've clearly annoyed you now which absolutely wasn't my intention at all, so I apologise for that.

This is how it came across to me as well. Even if you are joking its still in poor taste and isnt obvious thats what you meant

Lunar_Eclipse

rachy182 wrote: »

This is how it came across to me as well. Even if you are joking its still in poor taste and isnt obvious thats what you meant

SeduLOU I also interpreted as you did but I can see that Spinkz probably didn't quite mean it this way.

The way the words were written means the 'guess what' had to be either a particularly positive or negative thing. So 'controlling mother but guess what: her son pushed drugs for a living and ended up in prison' or 'controlling mother but guess what: her son went on to cure cancer and end world poverty.' Being gay isn't inherently one or the other, so one therefore assumes it as a 'ha ha, the mother ended up with a gay son' which most mothers probably wouldn't choose for their child (simply because it's harder in society than being straight), thus negative interpretation (not against being gay perse.)

I know that reads as very overly analytical, but of course our brain just does that in a nano second every time we read something.