The Duke Of Edinburgh Award

Nikkisun

fairy_lights wrote: »

As brilliant as scouts may be, becoming a boy scout and having your mum go along too as a helper is probably the average 14 year olds idea of hell.

When my son first joined army cadets he wanted me to sign up as an adult instructor - I told him if he was still there after six months I would as I wanted to be sure he'd stick with it - needless to say he's still going strong as a cadet but wants me nowhere near the place!

Maddybee33

I completed my Bronze (didn't like it, so I didn't go on to do Gold or Silver) when I was about that age- I didn't find that it made much of a difference to job or university applications, but, in hindsight, it's still a good thing to do as it gets them out there and teaches new skills. That being said, I completed my Bronze... some people dropped out half way through.

I don't think it will cause any depression, even if he doesn't like it. Maybe take him shopping for cool looking equipment that he'll be able to put to use on the D of E? Also, talking to slightly older children who are pushing for Silver or Gold may help to boost his confidence.

Good luck!

j.e.j.

geek84 wrote: »

Can you suggest how to eliminate his fears and encourage him to take part?

The last thing I want to do is persuade him to take part with him resulting in hating every moment of it, which may put him in a depressed mode for the long term.

Thanks in advance for your responses.

It depends what you mean by 'encourage'.. I wouldn't push it if he really doesn't want to do it. Maybe there are other things he likes to do? (Music, etc?)

Camping and outdoorsy stuff appeals to a certain type of person but it's certainly not for everyone!

And it makes not one jot of difference for university, which in any case is 4 years away (that's if he even wants to go!)

princeofpounds

Can I just ask ( as I don't know) does silver and gold help more than other forms of experience to get into uni?

Depends on the university, depends on the course! Universities are just looking for students where there is 'something to them' and it's just one way of demonstrating that.


However, I have to say I'm surprised by how unenthusiastic and lethargic many of the responses here seem to be. I can't underline enough how important it is for 14/15 year old boys to 'man up' (in the most positive sense of the phrase) and this is a great way to do it.

lulalola

Another person here who didn't do DofE (it sounded horrific) and still got into a top university for a competitive subject. I suspect now, as back then, so many people do it that it really isn't the magical element to the university application that schools try to tell you that it is. As others have said, university admissions tutors will be interested in extra-curricular activities and skills development in general, rather than one specific thing, so I would suggest working with your son to find some volunteering work or similar that would suit him better (I had a part-time job, played a musical instrument, had several hobbies and did some voluntary work experience).

miller

The list of skills/physical activities can be misleading. In reality it will be a subset restricted by one or more of the following: cost; travel/distance to get to; convenient hours (e.g. potentially out of shcool time); finding someone to sign off the book (perhaps excluding some of the more exotic choices).

The expeditions are generally well supported by the school with regards the above.

The Gold expedition was probably one of the best things I've done, but I dont think I've slept in a tent since!

susancs

lulalola wrote: »

Another person here who didn't do DofE (it sounded horrific) and still got into a top university for a competitive subject. I suspect now, as back then, so many people do it that it really isn't the magical element to the university application that schools try to tell you that it is. As others have said, university admissions tutors will be interested in extra-curricular activities and skills development in general, rather than one specific thing, so I would suggest working with your son to find some volunteering work or similar that would suit him better (I had a part-time job, played a musical instrument, had several hobbies and did some voluntary work experience).

I agree with you on this. I have a friend who deals with Uni admissions and she says DofE award is now on so many statements, that it is just considered commonplace, so does not make the applicant stand out. She says they are more interested in that something extra than "the norm" from applicants especially if related to the subject they wish to study. For example my daughter got a reduced grade entry offer for pharmacy after attending an interview in which she discussed her weekend job in boots, her shadowing of a researcher, her pool lifeguarding qualification, her Extended project qualification research and her piano playing. Friends of hers who had done the DofE with predicted higher grades than her in less competive subjects, did not get as many offers as she did.

jackyann

I think that DofE, Scouts, Guides (and dear Woodcraft Folk, our own choice) are all wonderful organisations BUT
if your teen wants to do it, but is nervous because your family doesn't get out into the great outdoors and do stuff, then encourage (and try it yourself!)
if he doesn't want to do it because it's not his thing, leave it - let him find out what is - and yes, for most 14 year old boys it's "hanging about"
but slowly, somewhere - maybe in activities you or family members do, or maybe through school, he will find an activity that suits him
one of mine went along to a small local swimming group, because his friend did - he found himself helping out some of the younger kids - and 2 years later he's got his lifeguarding & "official volunteer" status.

I know it seems worrying at present, but listen to those parents who know that pushing & nagging teens results in the opposite of your good intentions.

kingfisherblue

My son completed his bronze DofE, but it was his choice. As it happens, he was a year younger than the other participants, and the only boy! I was amazed that he was confident enough to go ahead under the circumstances. My son also has depression, but the fact that he wanted to do his DofE gave him a focus. His favourite part was volunteering in a village for elderly people.

If your son doesn't want to do his DofE, I wouldn't push it. Maybe he's just not ready - remember that boys mature more slowly than girls. Maybe is really just isn't his thing, in which case, although unlikely to cause depression, it could cause him to resent you. Whatever the reason, you should respect that your son is growing up and is at an age where he can make his own choices. You can guide him and advise him, but you shouldn't be making these choices for him.

Jagraf

OP I guess you're just asking! I think you have his best interests at heart actually. So long as you can give him informed choices, which is what you are asking, I'm sure he will be fine.

I wouldn't think about uni yet - my DD has just informed me this afternoon that she wants to do drama at uni instead of medicine. Ha Ha. So much for my input