Is my ex seeing someone else?

Delree

This is a crushing situation for me, but here goes.

We split up in the summer (ages ago I know) but we remain close. Or did until this weekend. She's been very secretive about what she was doing this weekend and when her brother brought it up earlier tonight she shut the conversation down.

I heard that she made out with another guy at a works leaving do in April (yeah we work together) and now my head is full of this.

I know I'm imagining the worst but it's driving my crazy.

She obviously doesn't want to say anything but I need to know. I know I could just ask but I don't think she'd tell me. She's so worried about upsetting people.

I'm going round the bend. Sorry.

elsien

She's your ex. Like it or not, Who she's seeing is longer your concern.

Delree

elsien wrote: »

She's your ex. Like it or not, Who she's seeing is longer your concern.

Absolutely right, I wish it were that easy though.

missbiggles1

You don't "need to know", you're just being nosy.

Delree

missbiggles1 wrote: »

You don't "need to know", you're just being nosy.

I want to know then. It's crushing but I want to know as I feel I should. But I guess you're not entitled to anything.

Just feel like I'm a fool. Probably because I am.

Kynthia

What good do you think knowing would do?

1940sGal

You need to move on. Working together isn't helping, more so if the guy she is or is not seeing is also a colleague.

Also, you don't need to know. The fact that you're obsessing over it and letting it get to you so much is really unhealthy.

You have to face cold hard reality. She's moved on and you need to aswell. Hard I know but there is really nothing else to be done.

Randomjargon

Get on tinder mate.

Delree

Randomjargon wrote: »

Get on tinder mate.

Sounds like a plan!

Delree

1940sGal wrote: »

You need to move on. Working together isn't helping, more so if the guy she is or is not seeing is also a colleague.

Also, you don't need to know. The fact that you're obsessing over it and letting it get to you so much is really unhealthy.

You have to face cold hard reality. She's moved on and you need to aswell. Hard I know but there is really nothing else to be done.

I know. Thank you I need some tough words because I am well aware how unhealthy this is for me. I can't help it though. I've never felt this way before. It's awful, wouldn't wish it on anyone.

1940sGal

Delree wrote: »

I know. Thank you I need some tough words because I am well aware how unhealthy this is for me. I can't help it though. I've never felt this way before. It's awful, wouldn't wish it on anyone.

If you find yourself unable to get over her after a reasonable time has passed you might want to look at finding a job elsewhere. It's extreme I know but if she's in your life everyday you're just going to be putting yourself through hell. Once she's out of your life and you don't see much of her, you'll find yourself feeling better, thinking of her less and less and eventually you'll find someone else.

Either way, a fresh start is definitely needed.