Teenagers travelling alone

Rambosmum

At 16 me and 3 friends went on a trip to Paris with no adults. We were fine (this was 12 years ago, before you could get internet in most hotels etc). Our parents must have been worried for the whole week, as we had no way of contacting them really.

The rest I was doing at 14 - at 14 I went on a trip to Paris with school and myself and a friend were tasked with going across Paris on the metro to meet with another school group, by ourselves.

My brother however, at 16 can't be trusted to go in to town alone without getting in to some sort of trouble (usually missing the bus or train home and having no money left.

bouicca21

Of course the answer is yes. Only a few decades ago a 14 year old would have been out in the workplace. We do our children no service by infantilising them.

marisco_2

bouicca21 wrote: »

Of course the answer is yes. Only a few decades ago a 14 year old would have been out in the workplace. We do our children no service by infantilising them.

There was no suggestion of doing that. The OP was seeking opinion and advice on how best to enable her young teen to handle themselves in new situations and to grow in independence and confidence.


Great idea OP. I was around the same age when I started travelling by myself, way before the days of mobile phones too. Things went wrong from time to time but then you just learn how to cope and get back on track. Took my first flight alone at 17. Felt well looked after and safe. Go for it.

mgdavid

marisco wrote: »

There was no suggestion of doing that. The OP was seeking opinion and advice on how best to enable her young teen to handle themselves in new situations and to grow in independence and confidence.
.......

I just had to re-read post #1.
<mystified> How on earth did you jump to that conclusion? The OP didn't even mention whether it was a real or hypothetical situation, nor that they even had children themselves.

Goldiegirl

bouicca21 wrote: »

Of course the answer is yes. Only a few decades ago a 14 year old would have been out in the workplace. We do our children no service by infantilising them.

I must admit, I was thinking the same thing.

Young people seem to be wrapped in cotton wool for much longer these days.

In answer to the OP, as long as the 15/16 knows the route they are going to take and has got the money with them to pay for the tickets, then yes, I think it's perfectly reasonable for them to travel alone, and they will relish the independence.

Spendless

Just in case you are asking OP because RL people are putting you off, please don't let it. When I allowed my 14yo son to catch the train/tram to the nearest city as described above, I was told by my sister that 'I was brave for allowing that as she didn't allow her kids who are a year younger to travel to/from school alone' She did acknowledge she was being over-protective though. My sis-in-law also chipped in with she wouldn't have allowed her daughter to do the same at the same age. Her partner though stepped in with he was travelling all over at a similar age, which stopped her continuing.;)

KateBob

I know it sounds like a cop out put it really does depend on the child.

I have 2 children, the 13 year old gets lost easily but the 10 year old can find his way between the 2 major shopping centres in town.

We have a tram system connecting us to town opening soon and I had hoped the oldest would be able to go with friends into Nottingham on it to shop, see films etc but it may have to wait.

Jagraf

I have a 15 (Nearly 16) year old who I feel is taking the next step towards independence. She travels by train without changes but I'm now considering her catching the bus from home to the train station, train into London, tube across London and a train the other end to friends on the south coast.

Reading people's views help. I don't consider myself to be over protective it was more practicalities and other people's experiences.

My dad was dn the pit at 14 and walked 8 miles to ok and back in the dark each day. He was truly independent so much so he then spent his evenings in the pub, so there's good and bad in every generation.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

The eldest - I'm still pleasantly surprised that she's managed to get herself to university, as she needed somebody with her to catch a bus two miles down the road when she was 17. It took her an extra three years to get to uni but she did it. I'm still not convinced she could travel more than thirty miles alone (and it wasn't for the want of trying to teach her).

The youngest? She probably would have done it at five if I'd have let her. She crossed London to visit her sister at 13 to see her at university - partly because the eldest wasn't happy to come and pick her up. Ive got no worries about her and fully expect her to be travelling the world as soon as she gets the chance.

So like everybody else, I'd say it depends on the kid concerned. You know if it's the right thing for your own, not because of preconceived rules, but because you know how independent and competent they are.

(As a clue, if you find yourself saying 'the other left' a lot or they're the type who will stand looking at toast carbonising in the toaster rather than switching it off at the socket and opening the back door - they're not right for it yet).

KateBob

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

... if you find yourself saying 'the other left' a lot ...

If that's the rule I still shouldn't be allowed to travel alone