Overwhelmed :(

dirty_magic

I think most young people think like this at times, I've had similar conversations with my friends. It does sometimes seem like life is just an endless cycle of saving money for something!

We've saved to buy our house, now we're saving for a new kitchen and bathroom. My OH doesn't want to get married and I doubt we'll have kids so we've got away with that but I can see why everything gets on top of you sometimes!

Most people do own homes and get married and have kids though so it's not impossible! It would be lovely to earn enough to be able to spend without thinking about it though!

AfterAllThisTimeAlways

It's nice to know other people have felt the same. There does seem to be this pressure to do it all, and do it all OTT. I am so not interested in a big wedding, fancy cars, huge house or anything like that. Just being married to OH, live in a nice family home and having a comfortable, not extravagent lifestyle, getting to a position where we are able to save for the things we want and not worry too much about the day to day bills etc. Probably, as has been pointed out, due to the way I've seen my mum live her life, and thought nope, not for me!

One step at a time though

crazycatlady1984

BrassicWoman wrote: »

Hi! I am not surprised you are overwhelmed as you seem to be planning

- car
- baby
- wedding
- increase %age of house
- new job

all in the next week....

All you actually need to do right now is pack boxes and buy a big tin of emulsion. Stop trying to live your life all in one go!!!

I sometimes use beta blockers to help calm me down.. have you seen your GP?

I think this is very good advice.


I have a lot of the same worries as you, and I am also a worrier, but the above is totally correct - you cant live your life all in one go.


For the moment - you have a partner who loves you and you have just bought your first home - RELAX AND ENJOY!!!! After all, what is life all about if you cant enjoy it?


Good luck! x

justme111

Getting married should be happy time , not grief for not getting the cake as you want it. I got married in my time for about £80 - civil register feel and a meal in a restaurant with husband . People seem to behave as if they were slaves to money because they want "things " - this observation is not aimed at you , rather general one from me seeing what causes people grief .

pukkamum

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

This is actually more common now than you might think. Perhaps it's time to start reassessing the options?

My husband and I are about to do this. he was earning 30k I was a sahm.
I'm going back to work on 17k and he is staying at home.
It's nerve wracking but very exciting, I can't wait to go back to work and he can't wait to get stuck into house projects.
We recently bought a house and this has meant we can afford to do this.

Worry_Wart

I've started to do yoga at my local community centre to get a grip on my anxiety. I'm generally stress free during the day but as soon as my head hits the pillow at night I go into worry overdrive. There are an infinite number of things to worry about and it just gets worse as you get older with more responsibilities (but mine definitely ramped up when I bought a house last year). Now I lie there visualising my yoga teacher and her calm words, practicing breathing and clearing my mind. It seems to be working!