The Garden Fence - help and support in tough times

burtha

Hi magicdance , welcome to the mad house :wave:

What I find odd is the look you get if you polity say you don't do Christmas , then normally i walk away laughing , as they are so stressed about the right present, the right food, how much money they have spent regardless of whether they have it or not , ....
I know some will love it , and that's great for them , and really a don't walk around repeating we're all doomed lol , but my ideal Christmas would be , a cheque for the kids , a house with just me and dh in , ( sorry kids ,don't mean I don't love you,just freeing you so you can do what you want ) , no tv , media or decorations,or idiots drinking . plus nice food and a few good books
Simple


Scarf sounds a great idea , sure your dad would love it

monnagran

Oh burtha, you poor dear. I remember years ago when my lot were small and I seemed to be providing festivities for the world and his wife. I heard a talk on the radio where an elderly lady was describing her lonely Christmas. She was being very brave. Yes, it would be very quiet. She had a nice chicken joint that she would cook for her lunch and a neighbour had kindly given her a bottle of sherry so she would enjoy a glass of that. For the rest of the day she would just sit by the fire and read her book or watch television.
It was quite pathetic.

I was sick with jealousy.

I have always dreamed of a Christmas Day spent under the duvet with a good book and a supply of cheese sandwiches.

Now, that IS pathetic, but one day I WILL DO IT.

In the meantime I have 2more scarves and a hat to knit and a mountain of cookies and brownies to make as that is what I am giving this year.

Ah well, Titus out!

x

Softstuff

When hubbys grandparents on his mothers side are no longer with us, we're going to a nice hotel to be pampered for the festive season. Unfortunately I like them too much to hasten their demise.

Christmas here varies each year, sometimes we have money, sometimes we don't, sometimes we have time , sometimes not. Hubby and I have been known to give each other the gift of apathy and not bother with presents.... why stress about it, it's a day is all. This year I'm hoping to pick up a bit of premade stuff from the supermarket and not worry.

ivyleaf

I love some aspects of Christmas but dislike others, especially that people get ridiculously drunk, and for what? So they can wake me up on their way home in the wee hours and then spend the next day being ill, for goodness' sake? :mad:

We don't spend a huge amount on presents, but enjoy seeing the grandchildren opening theirs The past few years we've been to DD1's for lunch but this year it's me and OH at home - DS has a partially-sighted friend who lives alone, so he goes there now and they do their lunch together.

I'm Catholic and really enjoy the religious aspect, but if you don't have that and don't have family either there's not a lot left.

ETA Sorry, got distracted and posted before I meant to. Wanted to say nursemaggie i'm sorry you and DS are feeling rough! Sending get-well wishes x

silvasava

I have mixed feelings over Christmas - I had my parents and MiL for Christmas every year but they are all dead now. My boys are in their late 40's so have been doing their own thing for years. DH & I enjoy a nice roast meal, a few sherbets and a peaceful day. I do put up a tree and some decorations but it's quite low key now. I hate all the commercialisation of it though - the message of Christmas has been lost in a sea of consumerism. I'm not religious but do respect what Christmas is supposed to stand for. I think I prefer the run up and getting together with friends!

monnagran

Silvasava, I get you entirely. I do wonder what people think they are celebrating.
It does seem strange that people should celebrate the birth of a child of unmarried immigrants 2016 years ago by overeating, over drinking, decorating their houses and spending inordinant amounts of money.

It was the same as the millennium. Ask people what they were celebrating and there were blank looks. Why, 2,000 years of course. 2,000 years of what? Uhh?

At least people on here are are honest enough to say that they are celebrating Yule or the Solstice or whatever. I find that refreshing.

x

mardatha

I have always hated xmas too. I like the spiritual aspect of celebrating the midwinter solstice - without all the pretentious fake Wiccan/Pagan frills. Just knowing that for umpteen thousands of years humans have huddled around a big cheerful fire in midwinter, hoping and longing to see the sun climb up the sky again. And I do love Hogmanay and New year.. A brand new year - one that might be the happiest ever!

TiredTrophy

I am finding "Christmassy" almost impossible with the terrible things happening to those poor folks in Aleppo and other places, and the lack of compassion for those who have escaped .....
And then all those at home with their troubles of homelessness and hopelessness.
We have a table decoration and some lights, we are making presents and getting together the family in the UK . It's very low key....with those who would like going to church and lots of walking and counting our blessings.
One of my children will not be there as he works with the homeless at Christmas and another comes at New Year as she facilitates a non religious get together for lonely foreign students!
I loved it when they were little with tree and garlands and singing.....but there has never been enough money for excess.
We always donate what we can to the Salvation Army, who came to our door when we had 4 children under 7, husband working abroad and so little money that the village shop saved the out of date cans for us....the SA provided two hampers of food and a small present for each child, but also came in and sat and drank tea and played with the children when I was so tired. I dont know who tipped them off, but I am still so grateful.....
Things got better in time, the 6 children are getting on but some struggle to find work and DH and I are abroad as that's where the work he does is.....and money is tight.....but we are safe and warm....and so many are not .

Um.....a bit of a going on......I'll disappear into lurkdom for a while.

mardatha

The Salvation Army is the only organised religious body that I have any time for TT .

pollyanna_26

TT Thank you for your post . I too cannot believe the level of passing by on the other side which is so common today . The news from Syria is so dreadful but has become just another news bite . I know evil has always existed but have never known a time when people were so uncaring about fellow human beings whether in the uk or around the world .
The small town near me has over the past few years had a few rough sleepers appear . In the last bad winter I found myself crouching down talking to a very young man on the snowy high street , those passers by who weren't pushing me aside in their haste to buy the next must have christmas buy looked at me as if I'd totally lost the plot . The contrast between all the glitzy carrier bags and a distraught young man who had once been someones son made me feel that humanity was in very short supply . The " because I'm worth it " mantra has become entrenched with many and I could weep for the loss of basic care for others . For some time I have had the words of Dylan's Blowin' in the wind running through my mind .It was relevant at the time of his writing but how sad it still is fitting today .
polly

Does anyone ever hear anything of 1/ 2 Tonsils ? I think of her often as things were not good when she last posted .