Attending parties as a single

janb5

Hi,


I have been invited to a 60th birthday in a restaurant + dancing. Really appreciate the gesture, the same friend invited me to her son`s wedding party but I hate going to functions where I am the sad old girl on her own. I resolved never to put myself in that situation again feeling more lonely amongst happy couples.


What do other singlies do?

DUTR

I prefer to attend solo even when I have a partner.

Jagraf

Take a friend with you?

Hedgehog99

Depends on the format. If you're sure you're the only single and that the couples will only chat and dance together, then it would be harder for you.

If, OTOH, there are other singles or the couples are your friends too, would you enjoy that more?

If the men are less keen on dancing, it might end up being circles of women dancing as groups anyway... unless everyone's a member of the local ballroom dancing club.

RuthnJasper

I am fast becoming the "sad old girl on her own". I'm the last of my generation in the family to not have a partner. I hate it.

But I deal with it by treating myself to something new for the party, be it an expensive item of clothing or a little piece of jewellery from Accessorize, so that I feel a bit special (in the right sense!!). I also try and arrange something really nice to do for the day or two after the party - so that if really gets to me, I can think "at least I've got that to look forward to".

And also, you might meet someone at the party. But, even if that's not important, I still look at it as me celebrating a family member or friend's special occasion, and try and be happy to be doing that, for them.

Hope it all goes well and that you have a nice time at the party. x

P.S. If all else fails, just think: No man = not having to put skid-marked pants in the wash...

janb5

Hi,


I cant take a friend with me as someone suggested as it is by invitation only. The trouble is there`s no escape route and the happy marrieds don't realize what a prune you feel sitting on a table where the only people you know are the hosts and their children( who have partners of their own!)


A friend suggested I call in sick at the last moment but that isn't great because of the catering costs to my friends.

tea_lover

Just remind yourself that at least a few of those people will be v jealous that you to go home on your own at the end of the evening

Yolina

janb5 wrote: »

I cant take a friend with me as someone suggested as it is by invitation only.

Have you actually asked or are you just assuming that you can't bring a friend?

The trouble is there`s no escape route and the happy marrieds don't realize what a prune you feel sitting on a table where the only people you know are the hosts and their children( who have partners of their own!)

I'm single and have gone to parties where I only knew the hosts. Just chat to other people? You don't need to be sitting there staring at your plate just because you're on your own

A friend suggested I call in sick at the last moment but that isn't great because of the catering costs to my friends.

That's just plain rude IMO. If you don't want to go, just say that unfortunately you are unable to attend and that's that.


Edit: and although I'm single, I certainly don't consider myself to be a "sad old girl on her own"

rachiibell

You are only the "sad old girl on her own" if that's what you let yourself be. A relationship doesn't define a person, being in one doesn't automatically make you a better person.

What is it you like about your friends? I bet none of your answers are that they're in a relationship. Well they must like you for you too! So no more feeling sorry for yourself with this sad old girl malarkey you are Janb5 and you are awesome!

Ps if it would make you feel better I'm sure .no one would mind you bringing a friend along just check with the host

janb5

Great suggestion but numbers are curtailed because of costs so no I wouldn't be able to take someone. I have no intention of pretending to be sick and totally agree that is plain rude and unacceptable.


Will try to come to a quick conclusion but wont upset/offend my friend in the process.


Btw I appreciate you all taking the time to reply- much appreciated.

gettingtheresometime

Maybe not the same thing but my mum has refused to go to numerous events because she's on her own (divorce) and she feels that the event concerned is a 'couples' event

Personally I think this is sad; the people have cared enough to ask my mum yet she's socially excluding herself over her perceptions.

Why not just go for the meal and plan to leave early if you're worried about appearing to be a 'sad old girl on your own'.