What to do - workload problem

AliceBanned

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

Darn it, the OP hasn't logged into MSE since this thread. I was wondering how her "discussions" with her manager went ...

Why do people never come back and update us?

Because I had to be patient and wait for my manager to resolve. Oh and as I mentioned, I don't like being dragged down by pointless unsavoury comments when I reach out for advice.

AliceBanned

PlutoinCapricorn wrote: »

Always bear in mind that if you can take it or leave it, you are more likely to get it - very unfair I know.

People who feel outraged when they are treated badly sometimes wonder why others are lukewarm: this may be because there is nothing left! So letting some of the bad feelings go lets others get their share - on your behalf.

Thanks, very true. I'm in quite a risky position financially, and this isn't the case for my two colleagues (I know that much about them as we work quite closely and chat about our home life sometimes).


Yes I learnt quite a lot during this process, because I realised that I had to stay rational and wait, so there was no point getting worked up all the time. Applying for other jobs gave me a sense of perspective and my aim was (and is) to move on, only now I feel less desperate because my needs have been respected, and the requests from the person with less work to keep the same workload more or less, have not been met. She is more confident and vocal than me, and for me I have to have a lot of pent up anger to express how I feel, and even then I sometimes feel it's easier not to.


I realised I would be taken advantage of it I didn't learn to manipulate a bit - the same as everyone else after all. I'm not a dishonest person but I think some manipulation of situations by controlling your emotions and opinions can help. I basically was flexible with which bits of work I let go of (if can let go of any) and my manager took away more (and the most horrible bits) than I even requested! So it was a far better outcome than expected. The team should work better now too, so I think it helped all of us learn a bit more about team working. What I really can't stand is not being able to express something, or any 'elephant in the room' situation. I think I struggle to trust, including trusting myself. But it's good to realise this and work on it.

AliceBanned

I may not have mentioned that one of the team of 4 is leaving in two weeks - she got a new - better job since I first started this thread. There is probably a slight link between her leaving and this team issue.


She was also aware and too polite to raise the issue but I think she had her own goals anyway - even if this had given her a shove to get another job she would probably not want to risk her job/reputation by raising it with management - and she comes across as a people-pleasing type (if you know what I mean) so would always err on the side of caution. I'm similar but I'm a bit more under pressure and don't have as much support outside work eg a partner, close family etc which she has so I handle things differently.


She was very hard working and pleasant to work with. She has had quite a bit of time off sick with stress recently though so it does make me wonder - whether she was bottling up stress as her workload was heavy and she had the same issues about the other one taking it easy and then repeatedly saying 'no' when anyone in the team needed a hand or was off sick. I covered for her when she was off sick despite being busy..but did it cos I know she'd do that for me.

AliceBanned

PlutoinCapricorn wrote: »

Always bear in mind that if you can take it or leave it, you are more likely to get it - very unfair I know.

People who feel outraged when they are treated badly sometimes wonder why others are lukewarm: this may be because there is nothing left! So letting some of the bad feelings go lets others get their share - on your behalf.

PS I do find you very astute, PlutoinCapricorn. It's a nice quality, like you think about things deeply.

PlutoinCapricorn

I learned a lot of things the hard way!

I do try to get to the bottom of issues, and believe that inner work and evolving, leaving others behind in the remedial school, solve some problems.

I do not see how learning to state your position calmly and controlling emotions can be manipulation though. It is upgrading oneself, becoming more adult, becoming more empowered...

AliceBanned

PlutoinCapricorn wrote: »

I learned a lot of things the hard way!

I do try to get to the bottom of issues, and believe that inner work and evolving, leaving others behind in the remedial school, solve some problems.

I do not see how learning to state your position calmly and controlling emotions can be manipulation though. It is upgrading oneself, becoming more adult, becoming more empowered...

Well it shows, that you are self-aware and aware of others.


Yes you are right, it isn't really manipulation - more persuasion. That is just something I never knew I could do before. Stating my position calmly and controlling my emotions is also a determination not to be outdone by others - actually not to be manipulated by them.;)

AliceBanned

Well I've applied for 3 posts during this time and have an interview for one of them next week. It is nearer home and lower salary because of that ie not in central London, but about the same level, if slightly below. So it might not be an ideal move but is in local government which I think I would find interesting.

I am still feeling a bit desperate to leave even thought the workload thing has been improved a lot, as I just feel like a lacky in my job to lots of academics and I find it hard to feel good enough about myself. I know that's personal to me as well, but now the colleague who was skiving is almost certainly looking for a job too - I overheard her when she answered her mobile in the office and she has a lot of agency contacts. So it seems a few of us are unhappy with the workplace and the job itself.

The dilemma I am in is that my manager is finally putting me forward for training for me to move into a different type of post but I fear that the training itself won't be nearly enough. The lady on the publishing course I went on said that you basically have to be an unpaid intern to get into that type of work! So I'm feeling really sad and demoralised and stressed, despite the interview - in fact probably stressed because of it. I'm scared of making the wrong move, and know I would not take their bottom level of pay as It would be a £6k drop but I applied for it anyway - could try to negotiate if they wanted me.

AliceBanned

PS I had my 1-1 with manager, development review recently and he said that he would like to support me; the will put me forward for the second part of the training in September. I don't want to be held hostage by this training but I need to decide what direction want to go in. Anyway I've not had an interview for over a year and am feeling a bit low so probably wouldn't get the job.

I thought my manager was hinting at the possibility of a secondment for me in my current workplace but I'm not sure. HR is currently working on retention as it knows part of the problem with staff leaving is due to their lack of investment in them and they are trying to correct it (apparently). I never know what to think though. Just seems to go on and on same boring stuff.I can't take a big pay cut which I would have to do to start in a new direction. Even then I might not get in - I might need to do unpaid work as an intern and I can't as I have a lot of outgoings/mortgage etc.

I'm quite scared of the situation really.

PlutoinCapricorn

Deciding what to do in your position is not easy: I can see that.

I would make some lists, with reasons for staying and reasons for going - in general. I would then do the same for your current job and the possible new one. Weighing the facts and pros and cons sometimes causes the scales to come down very strongly on one side or the other.

If I have a strong feeling on one side, I then make a big case in my mind for the other side! This strengthens the one I really want, and ensures that I have made a considered, informed decision.

AliceBanned

PlutoinCapricorn wrote: »

Deciding what to do in your position is not easy: I can see that.

I would make some lists, with reasons for staying and reasons for going - in general. I would then do the same for your current job and the possible new one. Weighing the facts and pros and cons sometimes causes the scales to come down very strongly on one side or the other.

If I have a strong feeling on one side, I then make a big case in my mind for the other side! This strengthens the one I really want, and ensures that I have made a considered, informed decision.

Thanks PlutoinCapricorn. I have a week to think about it before the interview. Then they may or may not offer me the job and I will know more eg annual leave, salary (if negotiable) and training/prospects. Even though I'm fed up of where I am I don't want to throw away what I have built up there and I seem to be making some progress with the training etc. I may use the offer to negotiate further in my job ie knowing that I can leave and getting the feeling that they don't want me to leave I can ask for help with my career change. I have nothing to lose by doing that and I am really struggling with it as a lot of the work is via internships. It's upsetting as it means if you are poor you can't access that type of work, even though you might be as good at it or better than those who can.