The Ultimate Incentive Part 11 (or 10B) It's The Final Countdown

ruby_eskimo

Thanks for the hugs Birdie, I'm feeling in a very happy mood this morning (might have something to do with only 3 weeks left in the current job, not that I'm counting or anything).

Congratulations on the promotion NIM, that's an achievement after only being there a short time.

And congratulations to Lara on the big move! Can't belive how old Robin is now, seems like 5 minutes ago you were still pregnant! I'm another one who would love to move somewhere (the Czech Republic has a special place in my heart) else for work and it would be more than possible with the jobs that OH and I do so who knows!

It was snowing down here when I left for work this morning but in London it's bright sunshine and blue skies. Still freezing in the basement but I'm not complaining really.

kavics17

Thanks Birdie, I was wondering if anyone picks up on that one. I met a guy through friends, he is just what I need and want. We match perfectly, honestly, we would work so well together. I fall in love I think. He is the first man I can imagine my life with since Leo passed away. We gave it a go 3 weeks ago but grief just does not allow us. This time it's on his side, he lost his girlfriend to cancer and he is not ready for a relationship. I understand it, I so do. But breaks my heart. I can't wait for him, I've been where he is right now and the journey is a long one. I have also started having therapy in December finally as I need to work on my grief too, I buried it for so long and it's now back with a vengeance. Little Kavics also started to ask questions about Daddy, it's amazing but utterly painful to see how she builds the image of Daddy in her little head. Nearly 3 years down the line you supposed to be better, right? Everyone expects you to be. The reality is so different.

clearmydebts

kavics17 wrote: »

Thanks Birdie, I was wondering if anyone picks up on that one. I met a guy through friends, he is just what I need and want. We match perfectly, honestly, we would work so well together. I fall in love I think. He is the first man I can imagine my life with since Leo passed away. We gave it a go 3 weeks ago but grief just does not allow us. This time it's on his side, he lost his girlfriend to cancer and he is not ready for a relationship. I understand it, I so do. But breaks my heart. I can't wait for him, I've been where he is right now and the journey is a long one. I have also started having therapy in December finally as I need to work on my grief too, I buried it for so long and it's now back with a vengeance. Little Kavics also started to ask questions about Daddy, it's amazing but utterly painful to see how she builds the image of Daddy in her little head. Nearly 3 years down the line you supposed to be better, right? Everyone expects you to be. The reality is so different.

Hi Kavics. I picked up on it too but don't feel I know you as well as Birdie to comment. I think grief is so individual and will probably peak at d
ifferent times. I think 3 years ago is such little time so cut yourself some slack.

I'm really sorry to hear things didn't work out with that guy but you have made the right decision to walk away at this time. I really hope you can make things work when he is ready.

Thinking of you, you must have so many different emotions going around in yourhead.

Birdie85

Oh Kavics, I'm sorry things haven't worked out well But, it's great that you managed to get to a place where you were able to open your heart and let someone new in. You should be very proud for taking that step. It's just so sad that he is also suffering as you have been, and still are. I don't think there are any rules for getting over the death of the love of your life. I don't imagine you could ever truly get over it, just gradually accept it. Well done for getting counselling, I really hope it helps you. Have you read 'Welcome to Holland'? It's about having a child with autism but it could be interpreted to your situation and I think it's a really beautiful way of describing that whilst the loss of a dream is painful and lasting, it is possible to appreciate the beauty in the life that you now lead. I'm not wording that well, but I hope you get the sentiment behind my bumbling ((hugs))

kavics17

Birdie, that is just what I needed now, thank you. Describes my thoughts and feelings totally.

Dinah93

Hey hon. I did notice the heartbreak diet but didn't want to pry, figured you knew we're always here to talk to if you want to. I don't really know have much to add, Birdie put it well, but thinking of you x

Busy day today, went through all the drawers and baskets in Grace's room and Ben's cupboard, looking beautifully clean and tidy, and I now know where everything is and that it all fits them. Piles and piles more clothes now though to get on ebay. Does anyone else have issues with soft toys? I swear they're breeding.

clearmydebts

Dinah93 wrote: »

Hey hon. I did notice the heartbreak diet but didn't want to pry, figured you knew we're always here to talk to if you want to. I don't really know have much to add, Birdie put it well, but thinking of you x

Busy day today, went through all the drawers and baskets in Grace's room and Ben's cupboard, looking beautifully clean and tidy, and I now know where everything is and that it all fits them. Piles and piles more clothes now though to get on ebay. Does anyone else have issues with soft toys? I swear they're breeding.

Lots of soft toys here too! I did do a cull in them a while ago though!

Surprisingly my kids wardrobes are always beautifully organised. I wish I could say the same for their little playroom. It's a disaster zone!

I do sell the odd bit of clothes on a local selling page, I find it way better than eBay. Have you tried it Dinah? I pass on the majority of clothes to my niece and nephew though but the mammies are very grateful.

Dinah93

I've tried facebook selling but it's not worth it, 50p for a bundle of 5 bits of next clothing? Would rather give it to friends and save me the time. First job is to sort the basics out and pass them on, I'm not wasting time trying to sell bundles of vests, hats, babygrows etc. I'll only try for the nice outfits, coats etc. Grace's baskets contained clothes that were 6-9 months until today .... alarmingly I actually had some of them on her last week.

clearmydebts

Dinah93 wrote: »

I've tried facebook selling but it's not worth it, 50p for a bundle of 5 bits of next clothing? Would rather give it to friends and save me the time. First job is to sort the basics out and pass them on, I'm not wasting time trying to sell bundles of vests, hats, babygrows etc. I'll only try for the nice outfits, coats etc. Grace's baskets contained clothes that were 6-9 months until today .... alarmingly I actually had some of them on her last week.

Have you tried any of the UK next groups for selling? The stuff always seems to go for a reasonable amount. It's a shame the local pages aren't good. Mine are great.

Birdie85

It's heartbreaking to see how little you get for baby clothes isn't it?! I have saved my favourite bits for next time and charity shopped the other stuff as I'd rather it get some decent money for charity than sell it on FB for 50p! There's a second hand baby and children clothes shop in the next town over to me that sells branded clothes on a sale or return basis, are there any shops around you that do that?

If you have any baby boy basics that you want to just get rid of, I know a lady from MSE/on my FB baby group who is due shortly and is quite hard up so would be a grateful recipient.

I really need to go through Z-Man's wardrobe and drawers, it's like a bomb's gone off! Mine's not much better I just don't get time, and when I do get time I lack the oomph.

And in super news, it's payday today! :j Can you hear the hallelujah chorus?! I'm treating myself to a hair cut (dry cut, I'm not made of money!) at some point this week, my mane hasn't been trimmed in about 9 months and boy, you can tell! :eek: