Was I right to speak out?

Acc72

Morglin wrote: »

I'm with you, as I have been a touchline parent, and my son (and coach) said that, actually, the biggest cross the boys had to bear was parents getting cross and interfering....lol. :eek:

So, I stood there, at times, all gritted teeth, and pent in aggression....but, if they ever want to play competitively, they need to learn to take the knocks, without their mums jumping in...

Let them sort it out themselves.

Lin

That approach is fine in a controlled environment - i.e. an organised game with a referee and coaches etc supervising.


What about a kickabout after school ?


I don't know the full situation but if an older / bigger lad was kicking and bullying another lad then the "stand up for yourself" approach may not work.

Morglin

Acc72 wrote: »

That approach is fine in a controlled environment - i.e. an organised game with a referee and coaches etc supervising.


What about a kickabout after school ?


I don't know the full situation but if an older / bigger lad was kicking and bullying another lad then the "stand up for yourself" approach may not work.

It depends, because if they want to play competitively, school or amateur, this will arise, again and again..

Most boys don't actually want their mums interfering...but, we all, as parents, do our best, so perhaps this was the right course of action.

Lin

Janepig

The touchline parent being quiet thing doesn't always happen believe me. My son plays under 9's rugby and this is their first season of contact rugby - they were playing a match two weeks ago, one of DS's team mates went over the try line with the ball and one of the boys on the opposing team brought his leg back and booted him full out, very near to his family jewels while he was lying on the ground. There was a near riot amongst our parents, the injured boy's mother went to check if he was ok and luckily the ref sent the boy who had kicked him off, I don't know what would have happened if he hadn't. First time in three seasons of DS playing I've seen someone sent off.

They're also only supposed to do one on one tackling at this age - DS had four of the opposing team on him at one point in the same game, I was shouting like a loony.

What surprised me though was that the child who was sent off was allowed to stay watching on the sidelines - if DS had done that I'd have dragged him back to the car by his ear and we'd have been home, I'd have been mortified.

I've told children off, friends of DD and DS, in front of their parents, no problem. In fact, DS's best friend gets told off by me more than his own mother tells him off!! I'd have no problem with anyone telling my two off if they're naughty - I wouldn't want anyone screaming in their face or anything, but a telling off and reporting back to me by all means. I've also got a "look" that I employ sometimes instead of saying anything and that often does the trick without me having to even raise my voice!

Jx

System

I couldn't have stood by and said nothing while someone hurt my child deliberately.

I couldn't have stood by and said nothing whilst watching a child do something naughty in the absence of a parent/responsible adult either.

Its the Mum in me I suppose.

VestanPance

Acc72 wrote: »

That approach is fine in a controlled environment - i.e. an organised game with a referee and coaches etc supervising.


What about a kickabout after school ?


I don't know the full situation but if an older / bigger lad was kicking and bullying another lad then the "stand up for yourself" approach may not work.

I'd say that's exactly when it works. If you want to see a lad get bullied, watch the kid that never stands up for himself.

Plus getting hacked at football isn't bullying, just part of the game.

Counting_Pennies_2

Morglin wrote: »

I'm with you, as I have been a touchline parent, and my son (and coach) said that, actually, the biggest cross the boys had to bear was parents getting cross and interfering....lol. :eek:

So, I stood there, at times, all gritted teeth, and pent in aggression....but, if they ever want to play competitively, they need to learn to take the knocks, without their mums jumping in...

Let them sort it out themselves.

Lin

If it was a competitive match, or indeed a match with a ref then I would have left it to the ref.


As it was it is 8 boys kicking a ball around in the playground after school, and one saw red and stamped on my son's ankle for absolutely no reason other than he couldn't get the ball. That is poor behaviour in my mind, so do I stand there while my son is crying his eyes out in what was a really thuggish thing to do.


Surely it teaches the child it is ok to do what he did. Instinct took over, his mother wasn't there as she walked home ahead with the younger child, but if she was there I would have hoped she would have stepped in and said the same

Counting_Pennies_2

VestanPance wrote: »

I'd say that's exactly when it works. If you want to see a lad get bullied, watch the kid that never stands up for himself.

Plus getting hacked at football isn't bullying, just part of the game.

Honestly? Seeing red, stamping on a child's ankle, drawing blood and pulling skin away is part of the game?

VestanPance

Counting_Pennies wrote: »

Honestly? Seeing red, stamping on a child's ankle, drawing blood and pulling skin away is part of the game?

Yes, you'll take a sore one every now and then. Probably dish out a few in your time too, intentionally or unintentionally.

pollypenny

I'm eith the majority, tell the little got off!

Sounds like the other lads agreed with you, OP, anyway.

Counting_Pennies_2

VestanPance wrote: »

Yes, you'll take a sore one every now and then. Probably dish out a few in your time too, intentionally or unintentionally.

So someone sees red, dishes out violence and that is acceptable? Really? In the name of football?


No wonder there are so many thugs associated with the game