Naming a third party in a divorce.

bluelass

I work for a large university so often get to hear things! A lady of around my age (36) got a phone call out of the blue about a month ago from a women saying she had found my co workers number many times on her husbands mobile bill. She went on to say she had discovered her hubby had joined many dating sites and chatted to and met a few other women and as she had seen co workers number many times wanted her name and address so she could instruct her solicitor to send her a letter to ask if she had committed adultery with her husband. Co worker told her to get lost and that she didn't know this ladies hubby and hung up on her. Anyhow she continued to receive calls and messages from her and she said her hubby had admitted to an affair with co worker and this woman said she had 5 children and one due after xmas and she would instruct her solicitor to apply for details of co workers earnings as she had caused the marriage to collapse and she wanted child maintainance off co worker as well as her husband. My co worker thought it was a practical joke but a week after the first phone call a solicitor phoned co worker and asked if she knew the man to which she replied no, he asked for her full name and address she told the solicitor she wasn't going to give either so he told her he will get them through her mobile number by way of a trace. What should be done here? This lady is married too and worried even though she knows she hasn't done anything. The woman who phoned er also says she has found an email from her to her hubby on his computer and that this man is a IT expert.

InsideInsurance

You cannot sue someone for causing a breakdown in your marriage nor get maintenance payments.

We all know that its easy to claim to be a solicitor, Wonga as an example, and just takes getting your friend with a slightly posh accent to make the call.

Ignore it, block their numbers, report for harassment if they cant

Armorica

1) She may well have done something but won't admit it to colleagues
2) She can report the solicitor to the SRA for harrassment if she really wants to
3) Any claim for maintainance is nonsense

duchy

Oh dear

I can find emails on computers.....you don't actually need to be an "IT expert" to look in a delete file. That said - the woman is a nutter. As for the "solicitor" I'd suggest if they call again your friend politely suggests if they want to sue anyone it should be the university they got their law degree from as their knowledge of law is woeful (or maybe the drama school they attended )

Personally my response would be to tell said lady to provide her OWN details so MY solicitor could instigate proceedings for harassment and slander and if she wasn't prepared to do so could you kindly flick off.

I'd then block her number -and if she continued to call I'd then when she calls place the mobile on the side for five minutes and let her talk to herself .....and stop feeding her rather odd hobby.

duchy

Armorica wrote: »

1) She may well have done something but won't admit it to colleagues
2) She can report the solicitor to the SRA for harrassment if she really wants to
3) Any claim for maintainance is nonsense

There is no solicitor -most solicitors have a basic understanding of law

Hermia

duchy wrote: »

There is no solicitor -most solicitors have a basic understanding of law

Agreed. I cannot imagine a solicitor phoning someone up out of the blue like this. My experience of solicitors is that they usually want to do everything formally by letter, especially at first. If this so-called solicitor phones again I would ask for the full address details of the firm, registration numbers etc etc so that they can be checked out with the appropriate organisations. It would be interesting to see their reaction.

Having had a few male colleagues who had insanely jealous wives I could imagine someone doing something as crazy as this.

Guest101

bluelass wrote: »

I work for a large university so often get to hear things! A lady of around my age (36) got a phone call out of the blue about a month ago from a women saying she had found my co workers number many times on her husbands mobile bill. She went on to say she had discovered her hubby had joined many dating sites and chatted to and met a few other women and as she had seen co workers number many times wanted her name and address so she could instruct her solicitor to send her a letter to ask if she had committed adultery with her husband. Co worker told her to get lost and that she didn't know this ladies hubby and hung up on her. Anyhow she continued to receive calls and messages from her and she said her hubby had admitted to an affair with co worker and this woman said she had 5 children and one due after xmas and she would instruct her solicitor to apply for details of co workers earnings as she had caused the marriage to collapse and she wanted child maintainance off co worker as well as her husband. My co worker thought it was a practical joke but a week after the first phone call a solicitor phoned co worker and asked if she knew the man to which she replied no, he asked for her full name and address she told the solicitor she wasn't going to give either so he told her he will get them through her mobile number by way of a trace. What should be done here? This lady is married too and worried even though she knows she hasn't done anything. The woman who phoned er also says she has found an email from her to her hubby on his computer and that this man is a IT expert.

The most ludicrous thing is this is probably true.

No ur co worker is not liable for anything. If they contact her again she should say 'this is harassment and I am calling the police'.

Sounds like a scam to get personal details

Mojisola

bluelass wrote: »

This lady is married too and worried even though she knows she hasn't done anything.

It will look strange if she doesn't tell her husband about this harassment - it will look as if she has something to hide.

fairy_lights

It sounds like some sort of scam - has she googled the name of the so called solicitor to check if they're genuine?
If the woman calls her again she should tell her she will report her to the police for harassment...she should also keep a record of all the calls in case she actually does end up having to report it to the police.

RAS

Hi

She should speak to her manager or HR and then ask the telephone engineers to put a special patch on her phone. Had to do this twice for people.

Any large telephone network should have the capacity to recognise the numbers and to record any calls that the worker wants to keep for possible action; both protection from harassment allegations and action agaisnt someone for haressment.

It could be anything from the distressed spouse copying down the potential rival's number incorrectly to your fellow worker ringing he wrong number a couple of times. Or even a student in the university providing the wrong number on their records.

She needs to talk to her husband in case this person gets hold of her home address.

Poppie68

InsideInsurance wrote: »

You cannot sue someone for causing a breakdown in your marriage nor get maintenance payments.

We all know that its easy to claim to be a solicitor, Wonga as an example, and just takes getting your friend with a slightly posh accent to make the call.

Ignore it, block their numbers, report for harassment if they cant

I don't know if it's possible in this country but in some states of America it is possible..... Strangely true.