Moving with Children

angel_eyes_3

Hi all,

I’m looking for some advice about moving house with small children. We’ve got the actual day sorted (they are going to my mum) but what I’m worried about is how they are going to react to the new place.

We have 2 girls, age 2 and 4 years. For both of them this is the only home they have known. To confuse the issue more we are moving into rented in order to break our chain, therefore they will be moving twice. Once into rented flat, then into final house.

I’m looking for suggestions on how to prevent the crying “I want to go back to our old house”. We’ve talked a lot about moving, taken photos of all the rooms, and of their hidey holes, and are going to make a scrapbook of pressed flowers from the garden. Once we get into the final house we have promised pink bedroom walls with fairies and princesses (but can’t really do that in rented!).

Any other suggestions for ways to ease them into tolerating their new homes would be appreciated!

Thank you in advance.

Angel x

p.s. have cross-posted this on house buying, selling and renting board. Wasn’t sure which was the best to post on, so thought we’d go for both!

abbecer

We too are moving soon and our boys are 2 and just gone 5 so we face similar to you. Although we will only be moving the once our eldest was concerned about leaving his school friends etc. What we have done is take them to the swimming pool near the new house and have planned to take them to activities in the vacinity of the new house. There are lots of things running during the hols at the libraries, playgroups and clubs. We are hoping that our boys will make new friends this way and will be excited to move to be near them.

Would it be possible for you to try this if your new home isn't too far??

Good luck with the move hope things go ok.

Rebecca x

misty

I moved last year when my son was 4 and half. I was worried but there was no need. I spent a lot of time saying - when we're at the house we can...... these were all positives (not that was anything negative)

It was everything from this is the fruit and veg shop we'll go to when we're at the new house. We'll be able to get to the park in 5 mins at the new house.

We got a new bed - for his new room.

We'll have a bigger kitchen for us at the new house ect.

I was bothered he might not settle to sleep quickly but he was fine. My friends who have children have been similarly suprised. I guess if you're happy they're happy. Also, they don't seem bothered about the mess and boxes.

Good luck with your move and your new house.

Doozergirl

Kids are fine when they move, mine haven't seemed to notice even.

My son was eager to see the new house and his new room before we moved and we took our 2 year old to look too.

Before we moved, we discussed a theme for our 6 year olds room and I bought a load of accessories beforehand so they were ready to go in as soon as we moved. The first things we did was the children's rooms and they elated with the surprise and have been as happy as you like in the house .

I wouldn't make a big deal out of leaving the hold house, tbh. Just act as if it's normal to move, not an upheaval.

littlemissmoney

Maybe let them "help" pack up the final bits in their old room before they go to your mums and say bye to the house so they def know what's going on?

wendym

Look in your library for story books on the subject, although I don't think it will be necessary.

My daughter moved with 2 girls the same age as yours, but the sale of the first house fell through, so they rented it out to tenants who they got to know, and whose son went to the same nursery. The new arrangement 'Jack lives in the house we used to live in' didn't bother her children in the slightest.

They are much more adaptable than we are!

Aoife's_mum

Hello

just wanted to repeat what some of the others have said. We moved last year - our dd was 2 and ds 3 months. She was completely fine - I don't think they have the same emotional attachment to houses at that age. As long as you are there I'm sure they will be fine. My dd just got into telling everyone "this is our new house" like she did with her new shoes - about the same level of excitement really! The only slightly bad episode i had was when in the area I stupidly drove past the old house because I was nosy and she got quite upset that we couldn't stop and go in. So don't do that!:rolleyes:

I would also recommend doing something nice with them after you move, so they don't associate the new house with you being stressed and busy unpacking - it can wait a while.

Hope it all goes well for you.

rev229

My kids were 2 and 4 when we move to this house, we told them we where moving and they came to visit the house beforhand (new build) they choose their bedrooms. We also bought them new bedding and curtains with their favorite characters at the time. I think they thought it very odd when all their toys where packed in boxes!! Kids are very adaptable we sent them to nursery for the day and told them when we came home it would be a new house. As soon as we got the keys we sorted out their bedrooms so that they had familiar toys etc. They came home to the new house and were fine and went to their new rooms. They never bothered about the old house. In fact I think at that age everything is very matter-of-fact. They are now 8&10 and I think they would find it very difficult if we decided to move, but I keep looking at houses anyway just in case!

Savvy_Sue

If you don't have room to unpack everything in the rented house, just make sure you have the favourites and essentials there ... and explain that the rest will still be there when we finish moving. We had our furniture in store for a while, and although our boys were older, they liked to come and look at it all from time to time!

When DS1 was just over a year old, we bought a house which needed a lot of work done on it, so we moved in with a friend while we did it. We ended up staying about a year, and DS1 was gutted when we moved out and left our friend behind! :rotfl:

gollygosh

moved mine at 3 and 5(had to change schools). my advice would be not to make a big deal about it, let them see you excited about what's to come. kids are amazingly resilient they pick up on your emotions more than anything else, if you're happy they will be to.

Dormouse

Just to repeat what everyone else has said - small children seem to cope with house moves very well (unlike the poor stressed out parents! )

Our DS was 3 when we moved; we actually moved to the other end of the country so it was a definite break away from his little friends etc. He didn't have any problems with it at all - they do seem to have a very short memory! He referred to our new house as "the new house" for months and months afterwards, which was quite amusing, but a year on, I don't think he even remembers we used to live somewhere else.

You'll be fine.