Baby steps to mortgage freedom for beanielou.

beanielou

potplant wrote: »

Dear Beanielou, you don't know me because I just read and don't post. But I can't let this go unchallenged! I'm sorry you're feeling so low, but - walking, falling, energy - I know this is demoralising ( see it in my own family) but as your signature said, you get up - and famously you keep plodding. That is strength not failure. Managing money- just re-read your own diary, you are definitely good at it, not that that makes it easy. Not a good mum? I seem to remember great achievements by your son even if he's also sometimes difficult like any young person. Spelling, I don't notice this but why worry? Memory, thinking - again, no evidence in diary to feel bad about, but being probably around your age I know the worry. But its a worry, not a fault of yours. And I'm sorry about your mum' s health ( and your cat's!) but no matter how responsible you feel for looking after them now, their health problems are not your fault. Weight - annoying, but in the scheme of things how much does it actually matter?
Sorry for long post. Good idea to turn off and reset. I hope you wake feeling less bleak, and I'm sure people you do know will be on here soon to counteract bleakness more effectively.

What a lovely post.
Thank you so much for taking the the time to post.
Dont be a stranger.

beanielou

ZTD wrote: »

You do well with what you have.



Public Service Announcement. Beanie would like it known that this is outside of a Saturday night in the Bigg market...



That's something you have to deal with, it's not a failure.



Really? Are you sure? I can't recall reports of your offsprung being unable to read and write and being generally feral. In fact, with his qualifications couldn't he be considered somewhat technical?

Offsprung durch technik?



If you'd been Jesus Christ - layer-on of hands, and general healer (not to be confused with other people who try to do similar but just end up in the news), then you possibly could be to blame for the health issues. Otherwise...no...just no...



You don't grief other people about that - why grief yourself?



Again, thinks you have to deal with, and not failings.

So, we're pretty much left with that you can't spell. That's not the end of the world.

Thank you Mr Z my friend.

Karmacat

Lovely post from potplant, and a typically supportive post from Z in the same vein. They both said it much better than I can, beanie. Be kind to yourself.
xx

michelle09

Adding my voice to everyone elses - you are dedicated on here Beanie, I can imagine you being great to everyone in your offline life. Have you got anyone to talk to about how you're feeling?

HairyHandofDartmoor

"I am not good with money" - None of us are or we wouldn't be here

"I am not good at walking" - that's not your fault.

"I fall a lot" - you can't help that.

"I have no energy" - that's not your fault, but make sure you eat well.

"I am not a good mum" - you love your son, so that makes you a good mum.

"Even the cat is ill" - poor kitty, it's not your fault but I'm very sorry.

"My mum has a serious health problem" - I'm so sorry about that beanie.

"I cant spell" - I can't add up!

"I cant think straight" - that's because you are under stress.

"My memory is dire" - that's because you are under stress.

"I cant loose weight" - nor can millions of other people.


You are a kind, generous, intelligent and lovely person who loves your son beanie. That makes you a success in my book .

beanielou

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

"I am not good with money" - None of us are or we wouldn't be here

"I am not good at walking" - that's not your fault.

"I fall a lot" - you can't help that.

"I have no energy" - that's not your fault, but make sure you eat well.

"I am not a good mum" - you love your son, so that makes you a good mum.

"Even the cat is ill" - poor kitty, it's not your fault but I'm very sorry.

"My mum has a serious health problem" - I'm so sorry about that beanie.

"I cant spell" - I can't add up!

"I cant think straight" - that's because you are under stress.

"My memory is dire" - that's because you are under stress.

"I cant loose weight" - nor can millions of other people.


You are a kind, generous, intelligent and lovely person who loves your son beanie. That makes you a success in my book .

Thank you
I just dont feel it

beanielou

michelle09 wrote: »

Adding my voice to everyone elses - you are dedicated on here Beanie, I can imagine you being great to everyone in your offline life. Have you got anyone to talk to about how you're feeling?

Not really, I find it hard in RL to open up.
My DS & my ma worry about me enough.
One of my good friends mum has just died.

HairyHandofDartmoor

You need to fake it until you feel it beanie.

Write down a list of positive things about yourself and your life, and then read it out to yourself every day. Eventually you will believe it.

If you can't think of anything nice about yourself then ask a family member/friend/us. They will be able to think of LOTS of things .

Don't be so hard on yourself

beanielou

What are the nice things then?

HairyHandofDartmoor

1 You are kind and give good advice to many of people on this forum.

2 You love your DS and you mam.

3 Your DS and mam clearly love you too or they wouldn't worry about you.

4 You have brought up your DS well.

5 You have good friends that you care about.

6 You like animals.

7 You manage well on a small income.

8 You are debt free.

9 You have lots of people on this forum who consider you a friend.

10 You have a good sense of humour.

11 You have a lot of common sense.

12 You are very modest.

See I've thought of loads of nice things about you, and I'm sure if I knew you in RL I would think of lots more .