Stay at home mums - what do you do all day?

MrsSippi

Before anyone gets the wrong idea from the post title, let me explain.

I am 10 weeks pregnant with our 2nd child so it's still early days but assuming all goes well once the baby arrives I am going to have to give up work. This isn't through choice but we simply cannot afford childcare for 2 children as it would leave us worse off. I have been really lucky with my 3 year old in that I have been able to go part time and she can attend nursery 3 days a week. Anyway, we have looked at the options of me continuing part time (or even full time) after baby is born but it will simply not work financially and like I said, we would be worse off.

I have got used to the idea of being a SAHM with a 4 year old and a new baby (due in May) but I am a bit worried about when older one starts school a few months later so I would love to know how SAHM's keep busy. I am sure that there will be lots of you thinking "well, we're busy raising our kids" (or similar) and I am not being sarcastic, I am generally interested. I want to know how I can make sure I am always keeping my mind occupied so I don't have time to get bored or wish I was back at work, though obviously the kids will take up the bulk of my time.

Again, I have the greatest of respect for all SAHM's as I know it is a flipping tough job (and that's just from being at home 2 days a week!) so I don't want anyone to misunderstand, I would really love to know what you all do with any spare time you do get, particularly those who may have had similar thoughts to me

lulu_92

maybe take up a hobby or a craft?

My friend makes cards, my mum does embroidery and I knit.

HappyMJ

Play online bingo....LOL please don't do that unless you know what you're doing. I do that for profit, taking advantage of all the bonuses on all the sites, instead of working and make much more than a job could ever pay. Last month over £2,000 profit. It seems to me that there are a lot of stay at home parents online during the day.

becca0417

I've been on ML for 9 months & just become a SAHM.
I play with little one, go to baby groups, visit relatives, walk the dog, do all the household jobs & food shopping so our weekends are free, do a bit of mystery shopping here & there.
I love being home with my little one & never get bored

Mrs_Shoes

I've been a SAHM for five years (eek!) hubby is military and works long hours during the week so I try and get everything clear so we have free weekends - washing, food shopping, most cleaning etc

The one thing that I think is essential as a SAHM is to have friends! We've moved a lot and having no one else to talk to apart from little ones is soul destroying. Plus mummy friends have little ones to occupy your small people!

We get out & about a lot. There's always some form of group on, or somewhere to go.

I won't lie, there are days when I bet my husband to let me do his job for a week, and for him to stay at home! I find it has got easier as my two have got older.

As for work, I'm planning to become a lottery winner

fairy_lights

I have a few friends who are SAHM's and have started their own mini-businesses making and selling jewellery, or ebay trading. Another friend is enjoying finally having the time to read and has developed a strong interest in Tudor history!

shell_girl

Today isn't a great example as lo and me are both ill, so we're snuggled in front of cbeebies.

In a usual week we will attend two or three toddler groups or sessions (things like singing group, baby gym or swimming). This can get expensive so I have a set budget of what we can spend each week.

We go for balance bike rides, do nature walks, visit the library and do lots of duck feeding.

Arts and crafts, jigsaws, letters and number games, simple baking are all good rainy day activities.

I use his birthday and Christmas money to buy season passes for local attractions like zoos, farms, nature world etc so we've always got somewhere to go.

Throw in housework, washing and cooking and I have never been busier in my life (or happier).

Edit, sorry just read you were after spare time suggestions! My partner and I have just started our own business, so I spend my evenings helping him with that, i do lots ofbuying and selling on ebay to keep christmas cash neutral, reading and lots of wasting time on the internet!

duchy

I've done all variations from SAHM to fulltime working and part-time.

A year as a SAHM was more than enough for me as I missed the adult interaction and struggled with the sometimes limiting conversation with other SAHMs as many I found we had nothing in common beyond the kids which became a bit limiting over time but it's a lottery who you meet in your Mummy circles. You could meet others who have a wider/similar viewpoint on life or not.(That sounds awful- many of them were lovely people - just not people I connected with above anything more than superficial)

When you are at home fulltime - the stuff you need to do appears to expand to fill the available time so although at first you think you'll have loads of time compared with when you were also juggling working - you actually don't in reality and still need to plan and time manage.

SAHM doesn't suit everyone- after a year I was glad to go back to work part-time which for me gave me the best of both worlds. We are all different though .

Spendless

Won't your eldest one be in full time school a few months after baby is born? (I understand this may vary depending on eldest's birthday and where you live).

I was in the same position with one child, childcare took up all my salary and no option to go part time. I went on to find evening/weekend work instead eliminating childcare costs. During the days when we were at home we visited friends/relatives, went to free story time at the library, attended mums and tots groups and once eldest was at school, was fortunate enough to find a computer course that ran with a free creche attached.

gayleygoo

"spare time" :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Although both my children are now in school for a few hours during the day, so once I've got them dropped off and got back home it takes a while to clear up the mess from the morning's rush, sort dishes and washing, make beds, generally tidy, clean out the rabbits and groan at the never ending list of other Things To Do.

Actually, I do sit on the internet for half an hour or so in the mornings to have my cup of tea, and other days I do some crafting if I get the chance. I bake, sew, batch cook, knit (although that's more of an evening hobby), make soap, and brew cider and mead. To be honest my morning mostly involves pile of clothes, dirty and clean. Then it's off to pick up the kids, get them changed and give snacks, then homeworks, then make tea. Then tidy up from that.

I was getting a bit brain-melty from all that though. I don't get out much with not having a car, and most friends working during the day, and not even children to talk to in the mornings! I started an Open University degree and really should be working on that right now than sitting on here, but it's a rainy morning and enthusiasm is low

MrsSippi

Spendless wrote: »

Won't your eldest one be in full time school a few months after baby is born? (I understand this may vary depending on eldest's birthday and where you live).

I was in the same position with one child, childcare took up all my salary and no option to go part time. I went on to find evening/weekend work instead eliminating childcare costs. During the days when we were at home we visited friends/relatives, went to free story time at the library, attended mums and tots groups and once eldest was at school, was fortunate enough to find a computer course that ran with a free creche attached.

Thanks for all the replies, which I will take on board. Maybe it won't be as bad as I am expecting, I think I just like to have plenty of ideas for keeping busy, then even if I don't need them I know they are there if I do.

In response to the above, yes my eldest will start school when the baby is about 4 months old and this is when I worry about. Luckily 2nd one should arrive at the start of summer which will help as it means we can get out more (my eldest was born in the January of the worst winter for years so this wasn't really an option). When I have got 2 of them at home all the time for 4 months or so I am sure I will be plenty busy enough but when eldest starts school I will be at home with a small baby on my own for the most part and that is what I found tough when I had my eldest.