Should I tell my family I'm pregnant?

DaveTheMus

thunderstruck wrote: »

Thanks everyone for the thoughtful and considered replies.

I am 25, with a house, a marriage, a cat and a dog and have been preparing for a baby for around a year or so. My sister's was more of a surprise but I guess he just clumped our news together perhaps.

I think waiting til the 12 week mark is probably a good plan, the good thing is I've been doing the Cambridge Diet so haven't been drinking etc since the start of August. As long as people don't wonder why I'm eating a little more (the old plan was 400cals per day), hopefully the questions won't start.

Why was your Dad upset that you were pregnant?

KxMx

Possibly he considers her too young.

I often see this attitude, at 18 it's "don't come home pregnant" and at 38 it's "when are we going to be made grandparents" lol.

Some parents are only happy about a pregnancy if it happens when they deem okay.

Buzzybee90

KxMx wrote: »

Possibly he considers her too young.

I often see this attitude, at 18 it's "don't come home pregnant" and at 38 it's "when are we going to be made grandparents" lol.

Some parents are only happy about a pregnancy if it happens when they deem okay.

She's 25 and married though, that seems a pretty 'prime' age to me!

KxMx

Me too but there is nowt as queer as folk

snowleopard61

I think telling some close family members now and waiting to tell others might very well come unstuck, compounding the problem (though his attitude does seem strange). I’d tell either all of them or none of them.

When first pregnant (years ago) I was unfamiliar with the convention of waiting until 12 weeks and immediately told everyone I knew, and did the same second time around too. I was fortunate enough that both pregnancies lasted to term, but really, if they hadn’t, I think I’d have minded more if people hadn’t known I was pregnant at all than if they’d known I’d had a miscarriage. That’s just me though. I must admit I’d be secretly hurt if either of my daughters were pregnant and didn’t tell me right away, though I’d try not to show it.

Congratulations, and I hope all goes well and that all your family are pleased for you whenever you do tell them.

shiny76

thunderstruck wrote: »

I think waiting til the 12 week mark is probably a good plan, the good thing is I've been doing the Cambridge Diet so haven't been drinking etc since the start of August. As long as people don't wonder why I'm eating a little more (the old plan was 400cals per day), hopefully the questions won't start.

Sounds like a good plan. You need to look after yourself and your hubby 1st, everyone else can wait.

We told family early (due to christmas, not drinking etc) and my mum broke our confidence. We won't make the same mistake again.

Congrats BTW!

Noctu

thunderstruck wrote: »

Thanks everyone for the thoughtful and considered replies.

I am 25, with a house, a marriage, a cat and a dog and have been preparing for a baby for around a year or so. My sister's was more of a surprise but I guess he just clumped our news together perhaps.

I'd be interested to know how old your mum was when she had you - as I'm guessing the only thing he's picking out of your situation is your age (which is ridiculous). For ammunition if nothing else ;-)

TBagpuss

I don't think you 'should' tell anyone. I think you tell who you want when you want. If you feel that your in-laws will be supportive and your dad won't be, then tell them and not him, for now.
I also think that if he broke your confidence last time it is absolutely reasonable for you to chose not to tell him this time until you are ready to start making the news public rather than private.

Congratulations and good luck.

jtr2803

As a parent myself I'd be more concerned about the effects of my daughter trying to survive on 400 calories per day than I would her being pregnant at the age of 25.

Don't tell him, he has no automatic right to know. Its yours and your husband's business. Enjoy it anonymously while you still can!