What would you do?

74jax

Having been on the board of governors, I would go straight to them.

meritaten

you cant go straight to governers with a complaint. you HAVE TO go to 'teacher', Head of year if there is one, Headteacher, and only then if you feel your complaint hasn't been dealt with properly, can you complain to governers. you should KNOW that! there is a strict protocol to complaints about school. otherwise it will not get dealt with.

Indie_Kid

Spendless wrote: »

My suggestion is what I have learned to do in order to get the best outcome regarding school matters. Put it in writing, take your opinion out of it and any emotion and stick to fact. Every time I have done this, the school(s) concerned have come back to me pretty quickly and resolved the issue.

and quote their own policies.

atrixblue.-MFR-.

74jax wrote: »

Having been on the board of governors, I would go straight to them.

But you CANT you HAVE to go through the complaints procedure, Think we just got the insight of governor-governor favors.


Even if your a governor, you would know the procedure even when your child is being bullied, and follow those, but it seems that you can pull off the minutes off the record favors.


OP ask for the schools bullying policy, then read that and follow the procedures in that, if that fails then go to the governors, if the governors fail to address the issue then onto the Local Educational Authority.

NicolaB_2

atrixblue.-MFR-. wrote: »

Even if your a governor, you would know the procedure even when your child is being bullied, and follow those, but it seems that you can pull off the minutes off the record favors.

I'm a current school governor and I certainly would not expect special treatment because of it. When I have had an issue concerning one of my children I expect to (and have!) followed the same process as any other parent. Complaining first to the teacher, then the Head and then the Governors if necessary. But I agree that you can't go straight to the Governors without complaining to the Head first.

sooty&sweep

It depends what form the bullying is taking. Is it bickering between a group of girls or abit more serious.

To a certain extent I agree with letting the children sort themselves out because they do need to learn to get along together.
My daughter regularly comes home telling me she's fallen out with so & so & they're best of friends tge week after.
If parents or teachers get involved with minor disagreements then parents fall out & what was something minor that if left alone it would have been sorted & forgotten becomes a more major disagreement.

If its more serious bullying or has been going on awhile then I would be asking why they'd not intervened. Also if a little gang has formed.

Jen

TBagpuss

I think I would contact the school not 'all guns blazing' but asking the teacher to clarify what she is recommending. Has the school spoken specifically to the child about ways of responding to the bullies, for instance?

She cannot possibly be expected to use all channels to deal with it herself without some guidance as to what that means, which might involve suggestions from the teacher, or support from her.

I think if you start with a "I think there has been a miscommunication - D understood you to have told her that she had to deal with the bullying she is experiencing herself, without any help or support. She has no idea what she is supposed to do to change how [bullies name(s)] behaves. - I wanted to come in to talk with you about what you had actually been advising her to do so she understands it and know that ou will support her as she puts it into practice. I also wanted to clarify what the next steps will be if this is not effective"

That way, you are not accusing the teacher of anything. If there has been a miscommunication she can clear it up, and you still have a good working relationship with your cchild's teacher. If there was no misunderstanding and she does, in fact, expect the child to deal with it, you are in a stronger position to then make a formal approach to the school, as you have direct, personal knowledge that the teacher is refusing to help, rather than a child's word against that of a teacher. It also allows you to discuss with the teacher your understanding of the severity of the bullying.

It's always easier to escalate than to de-escalate, so don't go in all guns blazing at the very beginning.

Mojisola

madvixen wrote: »

My best friends little girl (9) is currently being bullied at school. The child has raised it but has been told by the teachers that they won't get involved until she has exhausted all avenues of stopping it by herself.

I would ask to see the school's policy on bullying. I'd be very surprised if it says that this is the way the school will handle a problem.

purpleshoes_2

A relative of mine is a teacher and any hint of bullying that she witnesses, its addressed in the classroom there and then. Zero tolerance policy. Speaking as someone who was bullied at around the same age and it was ignored by teachers, this isnt the time to be asking a child of that age to deal with it herself, she needs adult support and if that support is not forthcoming then questions need to be asked of the school.

She could turn into a school refuser if she has to go to school every day and endure being bullied.