Division of assets in divorce

Mojisola

groovy_chick wrote: »

It is indeed a mystery where his money goes - they have never had a joint account so all bills/mortgage etc goes out of her account. He pays for petrol for the car (she gets the bus to work), car insurance, and some food shopping (mostly for himself). He would pay towards presents and meals out (if it was at the beginning of the month!) but genuinely he doesnt seem to have anything to show for it. We have often wondered if he has another family somewhere spending his money, but realistically I think it all goes behind the bar.

She's only got his word for the fact that he doesn't have any money. He could have thousands in accounts that she doesn't know anything about.

groovy_chick

Mojisola wrote: »

She's only got his word for the fact that he doesn't have any money. He could have thousands in accounts that she doesn't know anything about.

True, although I would be totally stunned if he was a secret saver ... I would be more likely to believe secret gambler !

InsideInsurance

Cyberman60 wrote: »

The OP says that he has paid zilch towards things and her sister even cleared all of his debts, so I think he really has no claim. Only if there had been a gain in equity and he had contributed should he get a 50/50 share of that gain. Perhaps she can pay him a small amount to keep the peace, and to avoid bringing in a solicitor with incumbent legal fees etc.

The house has lost value so should he share the loss ? Possibly !!

Unfortunately peoples views on their relationships tend to be coloured by the last X months/ years and the have convenient ways of forgetting what happened 9-10 years ago.

Sister can and has afforded a mortgage on a house and the bills of 2 adults for 10 years without assistance.

BIL has earned a near identical sum of money for 10 years and yet despite having only had to pay for car insurance and petrol has no money, hasnt contributed to anything and is always begging for money by month end?

Evidently dont know what the sister earns but it evidently isnt just NMW and so either his car's fuel economy is measured in gallons per mile or there is a part to the story we and the OP doesnt know about.

So far theres been the suggestion of a second family, gambling and alcoholic but all of these things would be fairly difficult to hide for 10 years without anyone having any inclination of them.

Now it could be that actually there was much more sharing of monies 9 years ago but things deteriorated and because things are so bad now all of the positive actions have been forgotten. Unfortunately if it did go to court then his full contributions would be considered and not just his most recent behaviour.


To the OP - just because there is banter down the pub doesnt mean he is necessarily going to change what he wants. Many guys I know will say all sorts of rubbish down the pub for comradery or big themselves up or to shut people up etc and walk away without any change to what they actually intend to do.

groovy_chick

InsideInsurance wrote: »

To the OP - just because there is banter down the pub doesnt mean he is necessarily going to change what he wants. Many guys I know will say all sorts of rubbish down the pub for comradery or big themselves up or to shut people up etc and walk away without any change to what they actually intend to do.

Thanks - I do hope this is the case. I'm sure he must have chipped in more in the past, as my sister only earns an average wage and I know she struggles. I also know that ten years ago when they got married, my Dad paid for the wedding and she paid for all of the extras - all she asked him to do was get the spending money for the honeymoon ... 2 days before the big day he admitted he didn't have any money saved and she had to find it herself!! Shame she didn't take notice of the big red flag then hey !

Seanymph

It may cost her more than a solicitors fee if she doesn't get one.

If he's like my ex husband he may be beligerent and try it on with her, but a solicitors letter or two and he will perhaps start telling the truth and being reasonable.

Sometimes it's more MSE to pay someone to do these things than to try and sort it out yourself.

She needs a good divorce lawyer.