Ageism at work help

purpleshoes_2

coolcait wrote: »

If you're new in a job, and miss a call because you're chatting - would it really be better if your manager noticed that? The OP probably had a lucky escape on that one!


It's also possible that the manager was trying to point out the missed call in a 'light-hearted' way.


The OP is not the first person to post on this forum about being surrounded by workmates/family who are almost cartoonishly rude.


The best way forward is to set boundaries. Either directly "I'd prefer it if we talked about something other than my age" or 'light-heartedly' -"I may be older than the rest of you - but I'm still not half as old as all the talk about my age! Let's talk about something different".

Shes been there 6 months, not really that new. I agree about the noticing about missing the call, however, dont think anyone should say to someone are you hard of hearing. It depends whether someone who was 20 something who missed a call would automatically be asked if they were hard of hearing particularly in light of the other comments that are being made to her.

I do agree, batting it back to them is the way to go.

dandelionclock30

I think if they keep going on I would bat it back and tell them straight that its getting quite offensive and then raise it with the manager if it didnt stop, its not on basically. If it was someone who was black who worked there they wouldnt dare be making jokes about their race all the time.
Its not good for the company if they let things like this go on really as it reflects badly on them.

pmlindyloo

Well I can remember being 20ish and thinking someone nearly 50 was ancient! That's life.

As you grow older you get younger (if you know what I mean)

A bit of banter is the way to go. Laugh with them. Telling them that you don't like it is not the way to go.. Will just create an atmosphere.

They'll remember it when they're your age.

[Deleted User]

Thanks for all your comments guys. I think it would be easier if there was someone else at least 30 in the team tbh. If I'm honest I don't think it's meant in a mean way but it's started to pee me off because it's like I'm from another planet.

Don't take the missing a call as any biggie I'm the top performer and it just happened the manager noticed when I missed a call because my back was turned away chatting so assumed I couldn't hear it . He wasn't being mean it's just unlike me cos I generally work like a machine lol.

I did find out that a previously older person asked to be transferred to another dept as she was so fed up with it but I like the job.

Carl31

If this was going to be a problem, why didn't you confirm who youwould be working wit in your interview?

It may be different as I go for management roles, but I always ask to meet my team and/or see the department in action during the interviews, so I know what the work environment is like

surveyqueenuk

Carl31 wrote: »

If this was going to be a problem, why didn't you confirm who youwould be working wit in your interview?

It may be different as I go for management roles, but I always ask to meet my team and/or see the department in action during the interviews, so I know what the work environment is like

That might be OK for you but I bet the majority of us wouldn't be able to turn down work simply because they might not like their colleagues.

purpleshoes_2

Carl31 wrote: »

If this was going to be a problem, why didn't you confirm who youwould be working wit in your interview?

It may be different as I go for management roles, but I always ask to meet my team and/or see the department in action during the interviews, so I know what the work environment is like

Never had that offered to me in any full time job I applied for apart from one where I was managing a staff team and even then I only met part of the staff team.

Plus, people can put on a different face for every occasion.

maman

BBH123 wrote: »

Thanks for all your comments guys. I think it would be easier if there was someone else at least 30 in the team tbh. If I'm honest I don't think it's meant in a mean way but it's started to pee me off because it's like I'm from another planet.

Don't take the missing a call as any biggie I'm the top performer and it just happened the manager noticed when I missed a call because my back was turned away chatting so assumed I couldn't hear it . He wasn't being mean it's just unlike me cos I generally work like a machine lol.

I did find out that a previously older person asked to be transferred to another dept as she was so fed up with it but I like the job.

In that case I'd just quietly get on with your work and ignore it all. They'll soon start looking at you differently.

Savvy_Sue

pmlindyloo wrote: »

Well I can remember being 20ish and thinking someone nearly 50 was ancient! That's life.

So can I, but I wouldn't have dreamed of joking about their age! And that's before age discrimination legislation kicked in.

pmlindyloo wrote: »

As you grow older you get younger (if you know what I mean)

A bit of banter is the way to go. Laugh with them. Telling them that you don't like it is not the way to go.. Will just create an atmosphere.

They'll remember it when they're your age.

I think I'd do my best to join in. I am both the oldest and the longest serving member of staff at work, we have some bright young 20-somethings and I do not always know what they are talking about.

BUT I think it's worth saying that we also have 30-, 40- and 50-somethings who sometimes talk about things I have never heard of or don't care about. It's all part of life's rich tapestry!

Edwardia

I think the banter could be an attempt to cover up their feelings of discomfort at working with someone a lot older. They don't really know how to deal with you, thinking there's no shared interests or reference points.

Instead of the stuff about talking about your age being old, which could come across as lecturing, I'd suggest meeting them halfway.

I'm not suggesting you swallow the whole online urban dictionary, dye your hair purple and listen to Radio One until your ears bleed but there are decent films, TV shows and music out there.

You could wander about on YouTube and find music you like and there are a couple of websites at least which suggest new stuff based on things you like already. Tastekid Gnoostic Musicplasma