Can you fall in love after just coming out of a long-term relationship?

Kim_kim

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

I don't know, i've just recently come out of a relationship and right now i can't even contemplate dating yet alone be ready to fall in love again (in fact i could quite happily stay single for life right now, love just seems pointless and doomed to end up in heartbreak).

That's not to say it can't happen though, some people move on quicker than others (in my experience the ones who ended the relationship seem to move on quicker, possibly because they have less feelings to get over so to speak)

Snap
I do wonder if the cure is to get dating again?
I've never been quite so "bothered" before (& I'm twice divorced) so I've never worried about the cure for heartbreak so much.
But maybe that's a faster cure than time?
Maybe that's why people do it?

System

Kim_kim wrote: »

Snap
I do wonder if the cure is to get dating again?
I've never been quite so "bothered" before (& I'm twice divorced) so I've never worried about the cure for heartbreak so much.
But maybe that's a faster cure than time?
Maybe that's why people do it?

Maybe

After the previous break up to this one it took a few months before i felt ready to throw myself out there so to speak. I did actually meet the most recent ex not long after starting online dating. A friend once crudely told me the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else :eek: not sure i quite agree with that, but meeting new people does shift your focus from the past i guess.

Kim_kim

In my case he moved out just over a year ago. We had a brief reconciliation around Xmas (maybe a month before & a month after).
That's far to long to be missing someone isn't it.

System

ladeeda wrote: »

For most, love doesn't happen often - take it when you get it

So very true.

vodkachick68

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

I don't know, i've just recently come out of a relationship and right now i can't even contemplate dating yet alone be ready to fall in love again (in fact i could quite happily stay single for life right now, love just seems pointless and doomed to end up in heartbreak).

That's not to say it can't happen though, some people move on quicker than others (in my experience the ones who ended the relationship seem to move on quicker, possibly because they have less feelings to get over so to speak)

I feel exactly the same was you! My ex is seeing someone new and I can't really be arsed to even contemplate seeing anyone else. He treated me so !!!! I can't trust another man to be honest. Going to stay on my own for a while and find out who I am:)

Mike86d

If they fall in love so soon after leaving a relationship, there is a good chance they were cheating? I sound like a philosopher :cool:

persa

Sometimes when a relationship 'officially' ends, it's been dead a long time. In which case, it may seem like someone has moved on really quickly - but truthfully, they may have been alone a long time.

clearingout

lulu_92 wrote: »

I worry for the kids who get introduced to new daddies more times than they've had hot dinners.

only new dads? not new mums?

marisco_2

When a long term relationship ends I think people need time to heal. To reevaluate what went wrong and work on themselves. When a person goes right back into a new relationship after getting out of one it's often on the rebound and it doesn't work. The amount of time between the two relationships can vary and really depends on when someone is ready. It is important to move forward carefully when children are part of the equation. Their stability and wellbeing should come first

cte1111

I fell in love with my husband a few months after I'd come out out of my only other long term relationship. It was just a case of meeting the right man at the wrong time. It did make life difficult for me in many ways, I'd not had enough time to get over the end of the previous relationship. You can't always time life perfectly but I am glad I met my husband and we are still happy together 10 years down the line.

I had a book on recovering after the end of a long term relationship and I remember it said that you can fall in love on the rebound, I certainly did. I've only really had 2 serious relationships and was single for years before meeting my first long term partner so I don't think it was the case that I couldn't cope being on my own.