Dad wants to go bankrupt.

Paul_1977

Deleted....

Free_Spirit_31

Your mother is very wise, I would agree with what she says.

For all you know, he could take your money, squander it or pay off his debts for him to go back into debt again.

It seems some people have to learn the hard way and not be spoon fed and bailed out all the time.

National_Debtline

Hello there,

Sorry to learn about the situation. Do you know if your father has sought any professional advice about his debts from one of the debt charities - such as ourselves?

I'm not certain that the money you have saved would be sufficient to pay off all of the debt although some creditors may accept a lower lump-sum than the amount outstanding in 'full & final' settlement. You can read more about those here. On the face of it, bankruptcy may be an option although it's difficult to say whether or not it would be the right option given the limited information you have provided. The car is likely to be at risk too - either by it being an asset which would vest with the official receiver (depending on value) or one which might have to go back to the finance company if it is on a hire purchase arrangemement.

Here is our bankruptcy fact sheet. Hopefully it will provide your father with a little more information to help him make the right decision, the process has changed a little from ten years ago.

Based upon helping callers over many years, I'm not certain that you helping him would guarantee that the situation will get sorted. Many callers we have spoken to who have had help from family and friends have often gone on to borrow again. Of course without knowing the situation in full I can only provide you with informed speculation.

You father may find it useful to complete a statement of account, he can complete the MSE one here: http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php

There is also one which meets the industry standard here on our website.

Very best wishes,

David @ National Debtline.

Paul_the_Painter

Listen to your mother. If you give him the money you'll never see it again. Be there if he needs some food/shelter, but don't give him cash, he can't be trusted with it.

consumers_revenge

Sorry OP but your dad justs sounds irresponsible.

His i'll keep taking money from the bank until they say NO attitiude then declare my self bankrupt and write it off is dire.

Hope you get another job soon though.

alastairq

Contrary to the above, I don't get the impression Dad's attitude is 'dire' one jot!

It is symptomatic of someone who feels they are on a downward spiral, however...and that attitude has been felt by the vast majority who still post on this forum, I suspect?

There is no clue from the information given by the OP as to what, or how, the debt situation has arisen?

Nor any real clue as to the domestic arrangements that prevail? {IE, are Mum & Dad still living together? Does the OP live with Dad? Or, what? Without excessive detail, of course]

Dad obviously feels inclined to try & deal with the financial situation himself...this, evidenced from the initial selling of the house?

But the spiral of debt means we cannot stop the world to get off.....we cannot bring life to a standstill while we try to dispose of the debt.

The finance industry does not want us to do that anyway..they want us to continue paying..it's how they make their profits, after all.

We have all been there [On here!...Others still live a blinkered life, in the belief they are still solvent?}....and most of us realise that, plans for the future laid on one day, can all be blown to smithereens a week later.

The pressures applied to us are unrelenting...and often, in order to simply appear to be surviving, we take the line of least resistance.

The fact Dad is even considering Bankruptcy actually tells me he has finally decided to be positive and pro-active in dealing with the financial situation.

What Dad actually needs, is support..from family & friends.

Not financial support particularly, but practical & moral support.

I suggest the OP gets Dad to look at the site below? [Maybe a few others could do with a look-see too?]

http://debtcamel.co.uk/

If only to obtain a reality check on the facts about bankruptcy...and the fact that BR isn't the end of the world, or the 'lowest point'....[ to me, an IVA fulfills that position admirably..]....

What DAd needs is a breathing space....hence his response re- using up the overdraught?

PasturesNew

Paul_1977 wrote: »

I have money saved, around 12k which I was going to use (once I had saved more) for a deposit on a house. But I am wondering should I give it to him to pay off most of these debts?

Do I let him be eaten by the dogs, or save him.

As harsh as it sounds, yes, let him "be eaten by the dogs". Your 'meagre' savings cannot save him.

Just be there for him and get help from the forums here.

-taff

Eaten by what dogs? He's spending money irresponsibly as you say, with no intention of stopping until he's stopped.
Do you think he will suddenly become responsible if you lend him your savings that you earned?
All that is likely to happen is he'll use your money, then do it all over again.

He's supposed to be the one setting an example for you, not you bailing him out.

BillJones

alastairq wrote: »

Contrary to the above, I don't get the impression Dad's attitude is 'dire' one jot!

I do. I get the impression that he's a user who'll drag the OP down with him given half a chance. As the OP has pointed out, his attitude is that he'll just spend until he can't get any more credit, then default.

OP, please, don't give him your savings. You are not helping him by doing this, and you'll just end up resenting him when he lets you down.

Tryingsohardtofloat

Keep your money, don't give it to him as he cannot be trusted with it. He needs to get a point where he can address the reasons why he is spending and this will not happen until he is forced to confront it. I suspect if you hand over your savings to him he will be very grateful & initially plan to use it to repay debts, but then whatever is in his mind that compels him to spend will kick in & before he knows it all your savings are gone & his debt is untouched.

If he is planning to declare bankruptcy then it may be prudent to let him know that the Official Receiver will take an extremely long hard look at someone who takes credit knowing that they cannot pay it back, it really is not advisable. Also your dad may need to know that BR doesn't automatically clear every single debt (there are some debts that cannot be included) & there may also be a repayment plan set in place for years to come, particularly if the debtor has shown signs of borrowing money with the intent to declare & never pay that money back.

Don't give him your money, in the end it helps nobody. But you are a lovely son

longtermplanner

I agree with the others. He has to learn the hard way. H won't be 'eaten by dogs' he will just have some unplsant calls from creditors and then when he is bankrupt he will have to live within his means as he will not be able to borrow.

By all means help him out with paying his bankruptcy fees, give him practical assistence to complete the forms etc But keep your money for yourself and your future.