Managing Finances in a Relationship

tillyenna

I appreciate this is quite similar to an issue in another thread, but it got me thinking. I'm getting married in September (yay!) currently, I pay all the bills out of my account (they were all already set up in my name) and my fiance pays me half of that into my account each month. I then pay into a secondary account a 'pocket money' for myself for my own personal spending.


This works quite well, but it's messy, and if we have an unexpected bill then I get the brunt of it - also my other half is useless at remembering to put money into savings, so I end up being the only one who's saving money (unless I nag him) - I was thinking once we're married it would be easier to have a joint account which both our salaries go into, and which bills are paid out of - and then each have a pocket money account with a set amount paid into each month.


But! I'm open to more ideas than this - how do other people manage their finances within a relationship? How does it work for you? What's worked in the past, and what hasn't worked so well? What do you think are the important factors?


Thanks!

Jitterbug123

I don't have this with my partner as we're currently financially independent.

However, a friend of mine and her husband have their own personal accounts, and then have a joint account that they each pay money into by standing order from their salaries. This then covers household costs, and bills, etc. Plus they put in for holiday fund. This means that they still have financial independence, but both pay the bills.

StuC75

Go with whatever works best for you too as people have different views on here.

How close are your earnings , responsibilities and likelihood or desires to spend money? Are you renting or paying a mortgage (Is that just in one persons name or is it held jointly - granted marriage does make some of that a little murky)..

Personally I favoured the joint account for bills which we paid a fixed set amount into for all bills (based on % split of earnings - seemed fairer than 50/50 at the time - I was earning and paying higher %..).. Money went into savings and a pot for food shopping - same kind of split and we had left our own money to as wished..

some favour the fully joint account approach - but do you have faith in there spending habits..

millysg1

All wages go into a joint account for me and OH. All bills come out of there and then we give ourselves an equal amount of pocket money (that we agreed together an appropriate amount) for that month to spend on "other" things, ie going out, clothes, luxurys. Anything left over at the end of the month goes into a savings account which we agree together what to spend on.

shiney85

My OH and I put an equal amount into a joint account each month, and all the bills and food come out of this. Anything "unexpected" (not sure what this would be?) would be split equally, we then have our own accounts which we keep the rest of our income in, and pay our own phone bills, car insurance, tax and MOTs from.

I think it's important the bills and rent/mortgage are coming from an account in both your names, otherwise it's like it's just you liable for everything. If he's not very good at saving that would suggest to me he's not 100% brilliant with money (sorry if that's wrong, not meant as a nag, just a thought!) and so if for example, food is coming from this account, and you have cards (OH and I have a card each for the joint account), I would suggest keeping the cards at home til you need them, that way he can't be tempted to use it for extra bits, naughty lunches etc, I know my OH would, but luckily he's forgotten his cards' pin number! xD

RAS

tillyenna wrote: »

I was thinking once we're married it would be easier to have a joint account which both our salaries go into, and which bills are paid out of - and then each have a pocket money account with a set amount paid into each month.

What are your respective credit ratings?

If either of you has lots of defaults, then you will wreck both ratings by opening a joint account.

Kynthia

millysg1 wrote: »

All wages go into a joint account for me and OH. All bills come out of there and then we give ourselves an equal amount of pocket money (that we agreed together an appropriate amount) for that month to spend on "other" things, ie going out, clothes, luxurys. Anything left over at the end of the month goes into a savings account which we agree together what to spend on.

This is a good set up, especially if you leave a float in the joint account. That means when something unexpected comes up it can be covered by joint funds and doesn't rely on your OH having extra available to transfer in. It also means you both have the same amount of personal money you can spend without guilt and means that regular saving is covered.

[Deleted User]

I've been married twice and on both counts, I had the same set up as Millysg1. It made sense and if your living together, you are a team. You still need some privacy/personal money but the joint responsibilities are covered by joint money.

Bennifred

millysg1 wrote: »

All wages go into a joint account for me and OH. All bills come out of there and then we give ourselves an equal amount of pocket money (that we agreed together an appropriate amount) for that month to spend on "other" things, ie going out, clothes, luxurys. Anything left over at the end of the month goes into a savings account which we agree together what to spend on.

This is how we have done things for the last 35 years! Works whoever earns the most, maternity leave, etc. Helps that we think in a similar way (ie one isn't "spendie"r than the other ) and totally trust each other.

Beckyy

We are paid into our own personal accounts and have a joint account for bills only which we each pay a SO into each month. (Cost of all bills ÷ 12 then split between us each month) The account had a small buffer to make sure it didn't run dry before it was up and running enough to take the larger annual bills like insurance etc.

themull1

Deleted_User wrote: »

I've been married twice and on both counts, I had the same set up as Millysg1. It made sense and if your living together, you are a team. You still need some privacy/personal money but the joint responsibilities are covered by joint money.

Ive been married three times, i cant be financially linked to my husband as his credit is bad, not that i would ever have a joint account again! i pay for everything, i bought my house 15 years ago, before i met oh. He pays me a lump sum into my account every month to cover his share of bills. Any money left is mine, my husband has more disposable income than i do, but he pays for holidays, petrol etc, it works out quite well.