Help after husband hospital stay

Cuckooclock

I had an accessment via a phone call from a local socail worker, my husband is recovering from pneumonia & is very weak. I have multiple health problem & he is my carer, I am also recovering from GCA & being assesed for PMR.

According to the social worker we can live on ready meals, despite having to be careful with my diet as I have had a renal transplant which is about 25% functional. I was told I don't need to hang out washing out to dry it indoor & that most things don't need ironing. Our son has been helping but is out of the country for 10days, I was told we can get our shopping dleivered them & we can manage short term

I felt so bad I cried when I came off the ohine, having a lifelong illness which I have never asked for help before. Can't inderstand why my husband was told to contact them for help when in hospital if there is nothing for me out there.

whodathunkit

Cuckooclock wrote: »

I had an accessment via a phone call from a local socail worker, my husband is recovering from pneumonia & is very weak. I have multiple health problem & he is my carer, I am also recovering from GCA & being assesed for PMR.

According to the social worker we can live on ready meals, despite having to be careful with my diet as I have had a renal transplant which is about 25% functional. I was told I don't need to hang out washing out to dry it indoor & that most things don't need ironing. Our son has been helping but is out of the country for 10days, I was told we can get our shopping dleivered them & we can manage short term

I felt so bad I cried when I came off the ohine, having a lifelong illness which I have never asked for help before. Can't inderstand why my husband was told to contact them for help when in hospital if there is nothing for me out there.

Whilst I can see it's a worrying time for you, the suggestions that the SW has made are perfectly reasonable and would allow you to cope perfectly well in the short term. Everybody has to adapt when illness arises and, actually, most of those suggestions would make your husband's life much easier in the long term and enable him to spend more time looking after you and less time on unnecessary household chores.

Concentrate your energies on looking after each other rather than being negative. Good luck!

Indie_Kid

whodathunkit wrote: »

Whilst I can see it's a worrying time for you, the suggestions that the SW has made are perfectly reasonable and would allow you to cope perfectly well in the short term. Everybody has to adapt when illness arises and, actually, most of those suggestions would make your husband's life much easier in the long term and enable him to spend more time looking after you and less time on unnecessary household chores.

Concentrate your energies on looking after each other rather than being negative. Good luck!

Ready meals aren't reasonable. They're expensive and no good for people who have certain dietary needs and they're generally full of processed rubbish.

OP - do you have a friend or relative who can help out?

Mojisola

See whether the Red Cross will help -
https://www.redcross.org.uk/What-we-do/Health-and-social-care/Independent-living/Support-at-home

Richie-from-the-Boro

Cuckooclock wrote: »

nothing for me out there.

we can live on ready meals

- you can, millions do [Rogers famous 'cooking test']

I don't need to hang out washing out

- you can, millions do, millions have never hung washing out, millions have no where to - hang washing out

most things don't need ironing

- I'm not sure I even own an iron, if I do I've not seen it for 30 or 40 years yet my personal hygiene remains excellent

can get our shopping delivered

- join the tribe, I've been doing that for 20 years + +, little man comes to the door and puts in in my entrance, no charge ASDA

Look you have a reducing 10 days till your son is home, you'll manage fine, you would be better researching carers allowance, DLA, and pension credit changes if your hubby is away for more than 28 days. Best of luck Cuckooclock !

Cuckooclock

How can adapt when I can't manage on my own as a rule, I am feeling very down with a 55mg dose of prenislone & am bouncing off the walls at the same time.

I am trying hard not to be negative, but my kidney function isn't good after 16yrs, we are always warned off ready meals. I have high pottasium & have to be salt free.

Yes, Ok I get it, I work all my life with a lifelong illness, in the meantime I had several life changing illnesses & the one time I need short term help, I offered to pay, there wasn't anything to be suggested.

Mojisola

Cuckooclock wrote: »

the one time I need short term help, I offered to pay, there wasn't anything to be suggested.

Why don't you phone one of the agencies in your area and book a carer for a few hours a week?

tomtontom

Mojisola wrote: »

Why don't you phone one of the agencies in your area and book a carer for a few hours a week?

This ^^

Sadly OP this is the reality for many people with disabilities, and not just for a few weeks either. Social services will 'assess', say you have no need for help, and close your case. I do have sympathy but rather than dwelling you need to make the best of a bad situation and get on with it yourself.

northerntwo1

Cuckooclock wrote: »

How can adapt when I can't manage on my own as a rule, I am feeling very down with a 55mg dose of prenislone & am bouncing off the walls at the same time.

I am trying hard not to be negative, but my kidney function isn't good after 16yrs, we are always warned off ready meals. I have high pottasium & have to be salt free.

Yes, Ok I get it, I work all my life with a lifelong illness, in the meantime I had several life changing illnesses & the one time I need short term help, I offered to pay, there wasn't anything to be suggested.

I can relate a little bit as had an accident recently that left me without the use of an arm and leg, whilst short term it meant I needed help. If you can pay there are options for you. My local Thai and italian deliver freshly cooked food, people will do your ironing etc. You can pay for a cleaner who irons and do other odd jobs. If you give specifics of what you struggle with I'm sure people could offer practical suggestions.

GlasweJen

http://www.wiltshirefarmfoods.com/search?q=Low+sodium

We use these to top up the meals my sister and mum make for my freezer, they're really nice and some are low sodium.

You can arrange for meals to come regularly or as a one off.

GlasweJen

Also a carer might not do the things you've listed, if you look at hiring a PA or phone an agency and tell them what you need done. You've not mentioned any personal care items so a cleaner might be more appropriate.

You can get all your laundry done and ironed using a laundrette service and some will pick up and deliver fairly cheap.