Tenants in Common

Tesstickle

I am living with the man I am soon to marry (it's second marriages for both of us) and we have his elderly, alcoholic mother living in an annexe next door. We all paid builders to renovate and extend the property in order that it meets with the requirements of my partner's mother. I sold my house and invested just over £70,000 into my fiance's house and his mother sold her house to pay around £220,000 towards the building works. The house has been valued at £750,000 and the plan was that all three of us were going to have a tenants in common agreement, each with a percentage of the value of the property. Unfortunately, my fiance's mother and I fell out because of her drinking and she persuaded my fiance to exclude me from the agreement. They both signed an agreement and my partner buckled under pressure from his mother that he change his will so that it is not to be revoked by his intended marriage to me. The problem I now have is that my money is invested into the house, but at present, I stand to lose that unless something is put into place that would secure my money! Where do I stand? Is there something that could be done to ensure that my children's inheritance is not lost?

tea_lover

Surely the question you should be asking yourself is why on earth you'd even consider marrying someone that would treat you with such disrespect.

heartbreak_star

Absolutely what tea lover said!

HBS x

fivetide

tea_lover wrote: »

Surely the question you should be asking yourself is why on earth you'd even consider marrying someone that would treat you with such disrespect.

Truth bomb.

The old crone will shuffle off soon, why can't he stand up to her?

Gigervamp

Maybe you can put a charge on the house. It might be an idea to ask this on the house buying and renting forum as the people over there have more knowledge in these matters.

Having said that, I'd seriously be re-evaluating my relationship if I were you.

Lovelyjoolz

^ What they said.

This man claims to love you enough to marry you and yet treats you so appallingly? How is he still breathing?? :rotfl:

At the very least, postpone or put on hold the wedding until this is resolved to your satisfaction.

As far as I know, it is not possible for him to "change his will so that it is not to be revoked by his intended marriage to me". ALL wills are null and void upon marriage.

What does the agreement actually say?

Tesstickle

I know and believe me I have questioned myself many times. But I love him and I know he loves me. Unfortunately, whenever this subject arises, we always end up rowing. I have threatened to leave on a number of occasions, but he always manages to talk me round and I feel I don't really want to go anyway. He keeps promising to make an appointment with his solicitor to change his will so that he will make sure that he leaves me a percentage of his estate, but so far he hasn't done that and whenever I ask him about it, he ends up being cross with me. To be honest, I feel as if he has me over a barrel - if I did consider leaving him, he would not be able to afford to pay me back, so I most probably wouldn't get my money back. When we first got engaged, we both agreed that as we both have grown up children, that we would keep our finances separate, so that our children would inherit from their natural parent. Sounds a bit like a business arrangement, I know, but we felt that was the fairest thing to do, rather than risking the children all falling out over who has what. But now all I need to know is what can be done to ensure my money is returned whenever that may be.

McKneff

Lovelyjoolz wrote: »

^ What they said.

This man claims to love you enough to marry you and yet treats you so appallingly? How is he still breathing?? :rotfl:

At the very least, postpone or put on hold the wedding until this is resolved to your satisfaction.

As far as I know, it is not possible for him to "change his will so that it is not to be revoked by his intended marriage to me". ALL wills are null and void upon marriage.

What does the agreement actually say?

Wills can be made before marriage. These are 'In contemplation of marriage'

tea_lover

Tesstickle wrote: »

I know and believe me I have questioned myself many times. But I love him and I know he loves me.

Nothing says 'I love you' like fleecing you out of £70k then getting @rsey when questioned about it.

What evidence do you have of handing over the money? Are you named on anything to do with the house? Tbh it sounds like he's done a total number on you.

Bean83

You say he loves you, but he and his mother have effectively stolen your £70,000. He needs to do more than change his will - what if you die before he does? Your children would never see any of that money.


And what if you split up before marriage - he can simply turf you out and you wouldn't get a penny. He's completely shafted you. Either he's a lying thief, or so weak willed that he allowed his mummy to walk all over him and you. Frankly, I'm not sure which is worse.


Unless you can get both him and his mother to change the agreement and add your name, you are stuffed (sorry to be so blunt, but I am very angry on your behalf!)

millysg1

It drives me mad when I hear "But I love him and he loves me" as an excuse for any bad behavior.

"I let him walk all over me, but it's ok, he loves me"

"i'm not happy, but I love him"

ahhhhhhhh

Sorry, rant over.

He walks all over you because you let him! Call his bluff, walk out for a couple of days, tell him your upset he has conned you out of £70k and say you wont come back until its sorted.