Turning 30 - What a strange age!!

egoode

My 30's so far have been fairly traumatic in my personal life. I had my Mum die 6 weeks before my 30th. Then 3 years later my Dad announced he was transgendered and her new name is Jenn causing major rifts in my family. I finally had a proper relationship but it ended fairly badly and I've been trying to buy a flat in London for over 18 months now and just feels like it's never going to happen.

However as hard as the last 5 years have been I've learnt a lot about myself. I'm definitely more resilient then I thought I was and there have been lots of good times along the way with my friends and family and I've also managed to get a job in the last 2 years that suits me perfectly.

I think it's definitely the time when you finally don't care as much about what other people think, you realise a bit more everyone has major issues in their life no matter how perfect it looks and I feel I've accepted myself more and generally I'm happier in my life and myself.

jackieblack

I had a massive crisis about turning 25 (early 20s you can still be excused foolish decisions, late 20s sounds like you should be much more responsible) but 30 and 40 didn't bother me at all.

The way I look at it now, I'm a day older every day and this is equally true on my birthday - I'm just one day older than I was the day before

fivetide

jackieblack wrote: »

I had a massive crisis about turning 25 (early 20s you can still be excused foolish decisions, late 20s sounds like you should be much more responsible) but 30 and 40 didn't bother me at all.

The way I look at it now, I'm a day older every day and this is equally true on my birthday - I'm just one day older than I was the day before

Likewise. "Late 20's" seemed terrible but being 30? meh. Don't feel any different. All about the attitude I think.

hazyjo

Same as cazziebo.

It was HELL! The whole year ended up being hell, in fact.

Now I'm in my 40s, I've realised age doesn't matter!!! OMG to be 30 again (only with the knowledge I have now!). Really, it's just a year over 20s. You're still a baby - only, I know, it feels like you're ancient lol!!!

Nobody these days starts settling down properly 'til they're in their 40s anyway

A 47 year old colleague is still out playing footie, and my BIL is still going away on lads' golfing holidays and goes out to 'lively trendy dancey bars' (not my cuppa any more). I certainly did all that in my 30s though (not the golf!)!

Jx

Anatidaephobia

jackieblack wrote: »

I had a massive crisis about turning 25 (early 20s you can still be excused foolish decisions, late 20s sounds like you should be much more responsible) but 30 and 40 didn't bother me at all.

The way I look at it now, I'm a day older every day and this is equally true on my birthday - I'm just one day older than I was the day before

I was the same about turning 25. When I was a kid, I always imagined 25 to be the "cool age" where my life would be totally sorted and perfect and I'd have a great job/house/boyfriend/social life, etc. So, as I got closer and closer to 25, I was increasingly aware of the fact that my life was nowhere near where I expected it to be. It's been fine ever since I got past 25.

Orlando_Virgin

I think the thing about 30, is it is that age where you THOUGHT you'd have pretty much your life plan in action, as socially it is accepted that there is no real plan for your 20's, just enjoy them.

In truth, now that I am 30 it has rung a few bells, but I don't get hung up on them. I just feel a bit indifferent, both when I go around to my married friends' house (not jealous, just think about what might have been) and when I'm out with 24/25 year olds (makes me remember I'm not 24/25 anymore) haha!

Overall though I have a good career, I'm happy where I live, have a great family and set of friends and I have always preached to everyone who has asked my advice that I would never settle for someone just because I hit a certain milestone or because it's "normal" to be with someone by this age. I'll just keep doing what makes me happy and see what comes of it!

No one has mentioned the increase in grey hairs and the introduction of anti-ageing moisturiser either!! jeez

hazyjo

Was even worse for me cos I got married that year (had been with him 6 years) only for him to dump me for his secretary three months later.

Talk about bolt out of the blue. It wasn't just the humiliation, the fact he'd let me hand my notice in at a particularly stressful overworked job (very unlike me - I've only had 3 jobs in my life and am never reckless like that!), the upset/grief, the confusion, the anger, the 100 other emotions, it was the fact that, at 30, I really honestly thought my life was sorted/mapped out.

Can you imagine how awful?!

I thought we'd be trying for kids within a year or so - but, instead, he had a daughter with her within the year.

Maybe it's cos I felt I lost my mid-late 20s cos I was more of a home bod with him, but I did go a bit wild again in my 30s!

Age is but a number... you realise that far more the older you get (plus it's an excuse to behave inappropriately at times lol).

Jx

HPoirot

Orlando_Virgin wrote: »

Haha, too old to be a socialite and too young and single to hang them up!! Strange times. Hope you're all well

No you're not! I was still swigging jaeggerbombs at 30; I am 37, married and settled now and wish I still was! Still think I'm not ready for kids either!

Ok I may be a bit extreme but age is what you make of it

Person_one

I turn 30 this year, I don't really have any strong feelings about it, except for shock at how quickly the years pass by!

I realise this sounds a bit like a guilt trip, it isn't intended that way, but my dearest friend died suddenly in her early twenties so I will never ever complain about reaching a birthday. The only alternative is to not reach them, so I'm luckier than many.

miss_independent

I turned 30 in February and I was kind of okay with it - I was resigned to the fact I had little choice in the matter! I do agree it's a weird age. I definitely thought I'd be married with kids and a good job by now. Instead, on the morning of my 30th I woke up on the floor of a girl's flat who I hadn't even known six months before, due to getting caught in a storm and I spent the day at uni (yep - 30 and a student!). I didn't really celebrate my 30th, I was going to go out for a meal with my parents but I was too busy with coursework. I'm single with no prospect of romance on the horizon, again because I'm so busy with my studies.

In a way though, I feel I've got much greater insight than I used to and I'm more emotionally mature. Lots of things are "clicking" for me. Certain things I find hard about being 30, particularly the fact of the biological clock ticking and that my loved ones are getting older. Other things, like the maturity, feeling like a woman (as opposed to a girl) and not having to deal with the petty drama that can abound in younger life is great!

I agree with Person_one, better to be 30 and alive than the alternative.