Loan from my parents - payback ideas

Pixie5740

I don't know...is it allowed? Is this 7 day holiday as well as short low budget breaks and weekends?

You don't have to go away at the weekends or eat out to enjoy them.

Perhaps posting a statement of affairs over on the DFW board might lead to some good suggestions as to how you can shave £££ off your budget.

Ozzuk

You ask is it allowed, well only you and your parents can answer that. If I owed someone money then I'd probably think it wasn't allowed - I'd be effectively going away on their money so I'd instead pay them back the cost of the holiday. Also, as said, how are you funding deposit for new house?

Really, all this comes down to your relationship with your parents and how they are feeling. Money can cause highly emotive discussions but there may be no issue, they may have seen it as a gift, or they may be annoyed that you are paying back at a trifling £100 a month, only they can tell you, not us.

50Twuncle

I would seriously consider transferring the loan to a bank (on fixed rate basis) - after all interest rates are at an all time low - so it really depends on your relationship with your parents - has it deteriorated since they lent you the money ?
Can you speak to either of them on their own (your Mum may be the best ?) - explain the predicament and decide, based on what they say ?

lynz68

Im sure this is causing stress between yourself and your parents.

If someone owed me £25000 and I seen them having nice holidays planning to buy a new house etc while only paying me £100 per month I would be pretty !!!!ed off.


I think you need to put more effort into paying this loan back ASAP even if it means putting off your house move. Could you not pay them a lump sum out of your deposit money, which you must have, and start saving again?

You need to sit down with your parents and have an honest discussion about this and come up with a repayment plan that suits you both. I would be including a lump sum in this plan as gesture of good will.

27col

No one seems to have mentioned that you cannot pay a house deposit using a loan. How did that get through the mortgage application.
My wife was specifically asked if the money she gave to our son was a loan or a gift. It had to be a gift.
Sounds as if someone lied to the mortgage company.
In any event you should be making a serious effort to repay the money. Not going on holidays at your parents expense.

dealer_wins

lynz68 wrote: »

You need to sit down with your parents and have an honest discussion about this and come up with a repayment plan that suits you both. I would be including a lump sum in this plan as gesture of good will.

^^^

This is what you need to do. Have an open and honest conversation and make a solid agreement that they are happy with.

If they are still being funny about it, personally I would approach a lender and borrow the amount and pay them off.

Lending/borrowing money between friends/families can get nasty quickly, and lead to permanent loss of relationships as is seen in the massive thread here!!

RedFraggle

I'm on the receiving end of a similar situation so to give you the parent's side of it I find it extremely frustrating that there appears to be money for other things but no money to pay me back. That said, I've not had a penny, and the last time i asked for it (at £10 a month i.e. a token effort) all I received was a rant from DIL but your outstanding loan is a much larger amount (ours is £3k).

I think some of this is differences in perception between generations. What DS and DIL see as necessities I see as extravangances i.e. a family trip to the cinema on a Sunday. Having been brought up in relative poverty my perception of what are necessities is very different to theirs. What they see as a basic right I see as a luxury. This creates tension.

[Deleted User]

Pay a few hundred quid to get them a will written, with a clause in it stating that £25k of their estate will be not taken by you due to the loan.

Sorted!

(I actually did this with my Grandma, its more of a verbal agreement but it was worth the punt)

I refuse to borrow money from my parents as I don't want anything hanging over my head. They can either give me stuff, or I'll sort it myself.

2bak860

@ringo - I like your last paragraph!
@redfraggle - I understand this - thank you
@dealer wins - yes, but I also feel that they let me have the money because I came to them. If I went to a bank or sorted it out myself = non issue
@27col - its a gift from my parents that I'm paying back over time.
@lynz68 - more effort and discussion - agreed. Thanks
@502wuncle - sounds like an idea to me!
@ozzuk - from a gift from the other side of the family. Should this have gone to pay back to loan? Should I have not bought a house and lived rented giving money to some random for the rest of my years? Only time will tell.

Thanks all. I'm starting to like the idea of settling and paying back a bank. Relations with my parents could resume and no one is out of pocket.

I'll think some more, and will talk with parents, but I think this might be the better decision.

thanks all.

Mojisola

ringo_24601 wrote: »

Pay a few hundred quid to get them a will written, with a clause in it stating that £25k of their estate will be not taken by you due to the loan.

Sorted!

Not necessarily so!

If I loaned £25k to a relative with the plan that it would be paid back over the following years, I would be very put out if they decided to stop paying and just said "Take it out of my inheritance"!

I'd be very tempted to say "What inheritance?"