help: tearing hair out with baby not sleeping IN THE DAY

modgit

My DS1 was just the same, it's most frustrating even if you're getting sleep at night.
The only way I fixed it was NOT to let him (and my other boys that followed) fall asleep during / after feeding. I kept them awake, which usually is hard to do, talk to them, change nappy etc and then they (should!) fall asleep because they are tired. It worked with all 3 of mine, they were all breastfed. Unfortunately, like everything else with babies it's trial and error, but that's what I did.

HTH

lindsaygalaxy

Do you use the swaddling technique at all ( where the baby is wrapped up so his arms cant escape and wake himself up?) that always used with my little one, and when she was older, she had a baby swing that she loved! I know some parents are against thema s they can get used to to the rocking motion to send them to sleep, but it always worked for us especially when my little girl suffered from colic and wore herself out crying.

rls1973

cheekyweegit wrote: »

Hugs and my sympathies to you Morty.

Firstly - a question, as your breast feeding, could you be drinking anything with perhaps a little too much caffine in it which although is not unsettling to your little one, could be keeping him awake as it's trickling through your milk, or anything else similar?


The hoover and washing machines are also quite good as they have a continuous noise which babies seem to like. The washing machine has in house entertainment too as the washing tumbles going through the cycle before the final spin.

Calpol and sudafed (snotty nose medicine) used to knock my middle son out within 10 mins of taking it. But he was a bit older and we thought it was coincidence the first few times.

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the age suitable for calpol starts from 4 months i believe

can i just add, as well as hoover, washer etc. a little radio near where baby's sleeping, low volume and slightly between stations, is another good "white noise"

regarding breastfeeding, try and drink camomile tea ,it can filter through to the milk a bit too, very calming (that's if you can take the taste of it!it's good with a bit of honey!)

amazamum

Big Hugs to you first of all,it can be a tiring stage,but they do eventually grow out of it:grouphug: .
Luckily enough my DD was great,slept 12 hours per night and would sleep a good hour or 2 through the dayfrom 4 weeks,But DS was another matter,he would wake every 2 hours through the night and wouldn't sleep at all through the day,I was litterally crying my eyes out most of the day,the only way he would drop off was to put him in his swinging chair,it used to rock him to sleep,a brilliant invention in my book,I also used to swaddle him at night and this helped.

They say you never get 2 children the same lol.
It will get better,does your partner help?,explain to him how you are feeling he might not realise the presure you are feeling.
Friends and family are also a great help.

Good luck

Savvy_Sue

Gina Ford is after my time, but I would second the idea of white noise on the radio, it's a little less intrusive for you, so could also be used at night if he gets harder to get off then as well.

DS1 always fell asleep feeding, and then preferred to stay attached, either to me or my finger (dummies were useless, and I'd sworn I'd never use one, and then cursed because I couldn't!) That DID create problems when he'd outgrown daytime breastfeeds, but that's on another thread.

DS2 NEVER fell asleep feeding, which I found hard to cope with. However white noise (the detuned radio) was brilliant. As was a wind up musical teddy bear, attached to the bars of his cot, which played for a full 10 minutes! We used to wind it up, walk away, and not go back until it stopped - and then only if DS2 was still crying. He very rarely was. Of course you don't have to go the full 10 minutes to begin with if you can't cope with that length of time to start with, but it is useful to have A time during which you don't go back.

And have a hug. They do survive, and somehow so do we ...

Woby_Tide

another vote for an untuned radio here too, saved us many a time with a baby who really didn't like 'quiet time'

Morty_007

Hi all,
thank you all for your support and advice. not sure how long I have here because my angel may start at any time so i'll answer any questions/comment as much as I can...
Before that...a but of an update:

He cried and cried last night and eventually DH took him downstairs and settled him. I had a glorious few hours sleep but was so stressed I didn't really appreciate it!
Little Angel has this morning slept for much of the morning. How much sleep should he get during the day at 6 weeks?

if very tired stroking between the eyes would work. You just run your finger very gently from just above the eyebrow down to the dip before the nose comes out again- it seems to trigger automatic shutting of the eyes & can be too much for a tired babe to resist lol!

this used to work with me as a baby and I tried it with him. Sometimes it works but sometimes he just shakes his head away and shouts louder...LOL!

Typing with one hand here as well!!!!

Have to confess he was in his room with the door shut having time out yesterday when I typed this...bad mummy

I learnt that if I wrapped him up tight in a blamket (I made a muslin sheet for hot days), making sure it was behind his head as well I could feed him & then put him down. He wouldnt feel the coldness of the sheet below him, or the space around him rather than my arms.

we tried swaddling him but he hates it and just struggles till he works himself loose.

MY son used t0 wake when putdown as well, I either had to feed him to sleep and hold him, or lie next to him on bed and sleep as well or go out in the car or put him in pram and walk him round.

Relieved that someone has suggested this. So scared of getting him into bad habits/reliant on a particular thing but sometimes I just feel I'm going to have to do whatever will work!!
Taking him for a walk in the pram is the one thing that normally works. Can't drive yet as had CS.

I cannot recommend the Gina Ford Contented Baby Book highly enough. She is very experinced and believes in regular naps and tells you just how to make sure even the most stubborn baby relents

I got Gina Ford out of the Library on Friday and took itback on Saturday. Made me feel completely inadequate and stressed out! :rotfl: :rotfl: I have heard it isn't for everyone

Firstly - a question, as your breast feeding, could you be drinking anything with perhaps a little too much caffine in it which although is not unsettling to your little one, could be keeping him awake as it's trickling through your milk, or anything else similar?

Have cut out all caffeine, alcohol (although it's tempting...:rotfl: ), I don't smoke and haven't for almost 2 years. I thought about this and there just don't seem to be any stimulants in my diet at all...maybe I should start, maybe I wouldn't be so tired!! Paracetamol doesn't seem to make any dfference to him, I have been taking it for pain relief.

Oh and as hard as it may seem don't pick them up right away when they start crying. It's amazing how quickly someone who looks so small and helpless can manipulate you into doing what they want! Oh the memories on this front!!!!!

Hmm, I'm torm with this one. Current understanding is that you can't spoil a baby by picking them up when they cry and that they are crying for a reason even if that reason is they need to know they are loved. Thats why I have such trouble leaving him to controlled crying. I don't believe they can be manipulative at this age (no offense intended!!)

Like you, I don't do dummies...never have never will, though it has been tempting :eek: . LMAO!!

At this age, my DS would only sleep during the day in his Fisher Price Cradle Swing...

again, good to know that they grow out of habits, thanks

There were several times I would walk him to sleep in the pram, and when I was pregnant with DS2 would go for a drive and when he fell asleep would pull into a layby for a quick 20 winks.

LMAO, image of a Police car pulling up...excuse me madam...is this your baby?

You could also try putting him down somewhere that's not brightly lit - a shady corner? - to encourage restfulness. It might also help to put him down whilst he's still awake rather than dropping off or asleep

Have been doing this in last few days and seems to have little effect on him. If he is going to sleep, he will sleep LOL. Think it has to be better for him though so will persevere.

You can handle the whinging so long as you get the breaks in the afternoon.

Absolutely! I cope fine in the morning but it's not having the nap everyone tells you you should have while your baby sleeps...err when would that be then?

a tip some one on here gave me was to put baby down to nap feet first not head first as the tipping motion wakes them up.

Interesting...I was told to put him down head first for the same reason. LMAO, wonder which one is true? Will try feet first for a while see if it helps.

My DS1 was just the same, it's most frustrating even if you're getting sleep at night.
The only way I fixed it was NOT to let him (and my other boys that followed) fall asleep during / after feeding. I kept them awake, which usually is hard to do, talk to them, change nappy etc and then they (should!) fall asleep because they are tired. It worked with all 3 of mine, they were all breastfed. Unfortunately, like everything else with babies it's trial and error, but that's what I did.

I tried this this morning and he is sleeping now. but he was already in sleeping mode today so who knows? He seems to have off days where he doesnt want to sleep and others (like today) when he sleeps really well...almost too much I suspect?

try and drink camomile tea ,it can filter through to the milk a bit too, very calming (that's if you can take the taste of it!it's good with a bit of honey!)

eew, really not a fan but maybe with honey...prepared to give anything a go at the moment. LOL!

It will get better,does your partner help?,explain to him how you are feeling he might not realise the presure you are feeling.

DH is wonderful but he has to work and finds it understandably hard to come home and see the pair of us in a complete state. Think the only time he has seen the angel recently he has been screaming his head off. (Lil angel not DH!)

DS1 always fell asleep feeding, and then preferred to stay attached, either to me or my finger (dummies were useless, and I'd sworn I'd never use one, and then cursed because I couldn't!) That DID create problems when he'd outgrown daytime breastfeeds, but that's on another thread.

not even thought of letting him suck on finger to settle him...another one to file away for desperate times!

another vote for an untuned radio here too, saved us many a time with a baby who really didn't like 'quiet time'

And another one to try at sme point.

Phew! I started writing this at 8.30 this morning and have ploughed my way through the posts. There are probably more now so sorry if I haven't replied this time. I have got to get out of the house and go for a walk. Lil angel is still sleeping...what a relief...for today. The frustrating thing is I can't think of anything I did differently today than yesterday but he is a different child so far.

Thank you again for all your help and support and if you got this far thorough my answers, thank you for taking such an interest!

I'll be back,
Mx

freda

I'm a great fan of the baby whisperer - I've taken a fair few ideas, esp those about body language, and used them v. successfully. See https://www.babywhisperer.com for discussion forums, you can get the booksfrom the library. Much more relaxed than G.Ford.

Sorry for short rewply, 1handed typing!

cells

Count yourself lucky, my mum tells me when I was a baby I would sleep all day and cry all night :T

Fen1

Have you tried a sonorous tick, like an old grandfather clock, or a metronome? The clock is big to buy for a baby (!), but I have always fallen asleep to the sound of a slow, lo-pitched ticking. Been a long long time since I was a baby, but a grandfather clock still makes me feel calm and dozy. Very Pavlov dog.

The ticking basically mimics your heartbeat which is comforting to a baby (remember that they can hear and feel your heartbeat in the womb); and the slow tick in itself is slightly hypnotic.
Furious tick tick tick of a battery clock just isn't the same!